Friday, February 27, 2015

Mobilizing all Forces to Discredit Former Victims

Hi J,

I was wondering if you received my e-mails informing my former bosses that I was being emotionally harassed on the job by the new guy, but of course they didn’t take me serious, because they were all in together plotting against me.  My book triggered their own repression and to keep their own lies, illusions and repression intact, they mobilize all the forces at their command to discredit me, just as I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions, page 173 “It really is a powerful feeling, and you’re likely to find yourself possessing a power that will be threatening to a lot of people. Society is on the side of the status quo, so be prepared. As Alice Miller writes in Free from Lies, going against the parents “is a source of major alarm for others … They will sometimes mobilize all the forces at their command to discredit the former victim and thus keep their own repression intact.”82”
This was exactly what my former employer S, PP, and S board did, they started mobilizing all the forces at their command to discredit me and after six months of trying every manipulative trick available to them and not being able to do it, they just fired me without a reason.

You might like reading my blog post of 2-8-15 Stalking the Soul, it articulates very well the manipulative tricks they were playing to make me lose it emotionally, so they could declare me mentally unstable to force me to quit or fire me with the reason that I was not mentally stable. They were pure evil, they rather destroy a soul than face their own illusions and repression. People like this are nothing but cowards.
Thank you for listen and I am looking forward to hear what your thoughts are.

Have a good weekend.

Sincerely,
Sylvie Shene

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge  

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Empathy

Dear J,
Thank you for the beautiful card. Your sympathetic words and understanding  is very helpful in helping me get through this dark cloud the sociopaths from my last job left over me. I think what I am going through is also what Alice Miller went through in her life and her readers’ letters gave her the strength to keep going and not give up.
My readers’ letters are also what is giving me the strength to keep going and not give up, because the sociopaths in the world really can suck the life out of you and stop you from doing your most important work.
Take good care in this world full of sociopaths posing as nice people wearing sheep’s clothes waiting for an opportunity to stab you in the back when no one is watching.
Hugs with love,
Sylvie

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Driven by Jealousy to Hurt Others


Hi L,

Nice to hear from you! Yes, I changed jobs. P’s mission in her last year at S was to make sure I would be gone. I triggered her jealousy and she was driven by it to plot against me, and few Rs on the board that are uncomfortable by my gained higher experienced knowledge, joined her in plotting against me and when they were not able to get anything on me, they used the new guy, MB and the Security company to plot also against me and  fire me without a cause.
Some people when you trigger their insecurities and fears can get very nasty and mean. What they did  to me was pure evil.  It was very sad, but I am better off now. Read my e-mail below to Mrs. A.  

I was born to expose the bad people in our world wearing sheep's clothes, so I did my job well at S,  because it sure did brought out their true colors!


Reading the words in the article What Really Makes Narcissists Tickthe property manager at my last job come to mind, she got so jealous and envious of my success of publishing my book, that she had to do everything in her power to try to destroy me to transfer her bad feelings into me, so she could feel better and superior again, but she was not able to and I'm sure she is suffering from depression like never before and probably taking medication. 
“The characteristic subjective experience of narcissistic individuals is a sense of inner emptiness and meaninglessness that requires recurrent infusions of external confirmation of their importance and value. . . . When the environment fails to provide such evidence, narcissistic individuals feel depressed, ashamed, and envious of those who succeed in attaining the supplies that they lack.”

Thank you for writing and my best wishes to you and everyone you love.
Much love,

Sylvie


date: Mon, Jan 26, 2015 at 4:06 PM
subject: Real Life Villains and Spotting a Sociopath - You Can't Win
Hi Mrs. A,
I am pretty sure I am being a target of a sociopath at work and I think you know who I am talking about.  I triggered her jealousy and now she is going to use her last year at work to manipulate things to make me look like I am crazy and unstable and make her appear to be the bigger and saner person. I am going to try to be careful and watch my back and keep my distance from her and see if I can survive her last year. Otherwise I might have to look for another job.

Below is an article about sociopaths if you have time to read it. I am her target and once a sociopath targets you, you can’t win and the only way to keep your sanity is to stay away from them.  This is why she didn’t share your e-mail with all the board members and just shared it with the one in charge of  Security, because in this way she has fewer people to persuade and keeps more control. The board member that is in charge of Security right now is totally emotionally blind and will never see through her games and will play him like a mouse.

I see the games people play so clear!

Thank you for listen and see you tomorrow,

Sylvie

Also read my blog post Experienced Knowledge

Friday, February 20, 2015

Proof of one of the Sociopaths’ Plotting

From: Sylvie Shene <sylvie@.com>
Date: Wed, Feb 4, 2015 at 4:22 PM
Subject: here is proof that I am being harassed on the job
To: "KW (work)" <k.w@sinc.com>

Hi K,

I have more proof I am being harassed on the job. Today it came to my attention that the new guy MB called others co-workers at home to see if they had anything bad to say about me. It proves that the new guy MB has been plotting against me to steal my job. You can ask other co-workers for yourself, if the new guy MB called them at home trying to get information about me, that he could use against me, this is total harassment. Anyway this is how I found out, this co-worker asked me if he could give four hours of his Fridays shift to CD and I told him that down town office would have to approve it also and if he didn’t mind waiting a little bit, because I was dealing with a lot of staff right now and he says: I know! The new guy MB called me at home to see if I had anything bad to say against you and I told him that I didn’t have anything bad to say about you, that all these years I worked here, you only have been kind to me.
This is exactly what sociopaths/psychopaths do, just like the article I sent you says: “1.Know your enemy: Sociopaths manipulate, lie and scheme against you. They think nothing of spending 10 hours a day on the phone, or in person, telling anyone and everyone lie after lie about you. Your reputation may be in tatters by the time they are done. According to therapist Martha Stout in The SociopathNext Door, sociopaths have no remorse. They do not feel sorrow when they destroy your life.”

I am the victim here and haven’t been able to sleep well because the emotional harassment I have been through on the job. And yesterday when I was being interviewed by the ladies at HR, I felt like they were accusing me of wrong doing and the problems were caused by my actions, which could not be further from the truth, but this is what the sociopaths do, they twist everything around to make them look good by destroying their target so they can steal their job or money or whatever their target have that they want for themselves. The only wrong I have done to the new guy MB, or anyone is of being too kind, nice and wanting to help all of my co-workers. He has no idea how good he had it there if he had work with me, instead of working against me.

Sylvie

Thursday, February 19, 2015

My First Day on the New Job

Hi Mrs. PS,

Today was my first day at my new job! I felt like I was a star! :-) Everyone would come up to me everywhere, even when I was in the ladies bathroom and people would ask me: are you Sylvie? And I would say: yes I am! And she replied: I am M, I work at HR, welcome aboard! And I said: Thank you! I am happy to be here! :-)

Mrs. PS your husband must have given references out of this world! I never felt so welcome into a new company in my entire life! Thank you so much! Please let me know if I can ever be of assistance to you.

This experience showed me who is real at S and who is not.

I will never forget any of you that helped me get through this very dark cloud in my life.

I don't know how PP, some members of S board, and the Security Company can sleep at night after of what they have done to me, it was pure evil. They did everything in the book to break me emotionally, to murder my soul and when they couldn't, they just let me go without a reason, because their little plan to discredit me and declare me mentally unstable didn't work!

Forever grateful to you all,

Sylvie

Monday, February 16, 2015

You are not Alone


Dear S,

Thank you for your kindness and comforting words.

It’s very comforting to hear from people that fully understands what happened and is capable of really seeing and feeling.
Sadly the work place can become a place where people unconsciously and compulsively tell their true tragic stories of their own childhoods by reenacting it with innocent people and making them their scapegoat, turning the work place into dangerous and a toxic environment .
I too went through most of my life feeling unwanted and rejected, and if I have not healed my childhood wounds of being unwanted and rejected as a child, I have no doubt this present rejection and betrayal would have thrown me over the edge.
Thank you for sharing about your personal experiences in the work place. I know I am not alone, but it's nice to be reminded by others that I am not alone.
All the best to you and stay safe.

Sylvie





Sunday, February 15, 2015

They showed me the Truth of their own Childhoods


Dear Sylvie, I am very sorry to read on your blog that you have been terminated. This is a very painful experience even if you understand - as you do - what is really going on. I wish you all possible support from your friends and from your inner knowledge. It is such an incredible journey you made and you were able to describe in your book. So encouraging. I read your book for weeks, time and time again - but just now I feel it is even too much for me and I lost the contact. Sometimes - not, always - I don't know how I survived because there weren't any helping witnesses in my childhood. The bad and cruel experience you describe with your ex I made several times.  Sylvie, sometimes I think you could be the right person to become a professional counselor or therapist or as you would name it. You have the knowledge, you have real and honest exchange and communication in your life. But however I wish you a safe place from which you can continue to do good and lovely things.

Thanks for your book and for speaking out and all the very best to you – 

Dear S,

Thank you for writing and for reading my book. I am glad to hear my book is being a helping witness to you.

Understanding that people rather murder others souls and destroy others, so they can keep their own repression and illusions intact to protect themselves from having to face and feel their own painful truths, helps me to get through it, but it still hurts and is a very big reminder of the pain I suffered as a small defenseless child at the hands of ignorant and abusive teachers and older sisters and brothers.
The way they are treating me, they are  also showing me unconsciously and compulsively how they were treated as small children and how they have treated their own children.

I am starting a new job soon and now that I am getting away from this toxic situation hopefully this will be water under the bridge soon and I can keep doing my work and continue to be a helping witness to others.

Wishing you the very best to you too and thank you for understanding,
 Sylvie

Dear S,

I like to add a few more words to the e-mail I sent you yesterday, to let you know, that when I read your e-mail I was feeling down by the betrayal I suffered at my work and feeling pretty lonely. And reading your understanding words, I didn’t feel so alone, knowing that there was someone out there capable of seeing and feeling and that understands what I am going through was very comforting to me.

I am sorry you didn’t have a helping witness in your childhood, no child should have to grow up all alone in the painful emotional prisons of their parents and because of it you too have to suffer so much, like me, in your adult personal relationships.

Take good care and again thank you for writing and I hope you find your personal freedom soon.

Much love,

Sylvie




Saturday, February 14, 2015

Cowards always get Others to do the Dirty Work for Them

Hi F and G,

Thank you for writing.

The real culprits here are PP and X Board. What Mr. K wrote on his e-mail is totally bullshit. Years ago when Mr. C was on the board in the chair of security, he came to me and told me: if any anyone under me or anyone else gave me trouble to call him and he would take care of it for me. Over the 9 and half years I worked there, I have worked with difficult people, but I always managed to work with them. But once, while Mr. C was still on the board, I did have a little issue with the Security Company over a pay vacation check that they kept insisting that they had paid me, when they had not, and after many e-mails and phone calls to HR, I could not get them to fix their mistake and pay me for my vacation, so I called Mr. C and explain to him my issue with S. and Mr. C called S and told them: that if I ever quit my job because of S that S would be gone too! And my little problem with S was solved over night!

When I went to Mr. K to tell him I was being emotionally abused or bully by the new guy MB, he told me that it's an issue of the security company and he would rather not get involved. Of course he didn’t want to get involved, he, PP and other members of the X board started the emotional harassment with their packages abusive procedure  and were plotting with the security company to finish the job they started and do the fatal stabbing in my back to finish with me.

The quotes below describes exactly what happened after i published my book! The property manager recruited a team of flying monkeys taking turns doing her dirty work and she got the new guy and the security company to finish the job she started, this is how cowards work! We all know who the real culprit is!? The property manager!!!

Yes, she wanted to discredit me and reduce me to an inferior being, less than nothing.
Yep! This was one of the big reasons i was target by the sociopath that was the property manager at my last job, because i am a truly happy and free person, but she was not able to destroy me and she didn't walk away wearing my skin. But instead her true self was revealed.



Reading the quote above, the property manager at the community where I worked comes to mind. She was very jealous of me and she and the board manipulated by her came up with a messy packages abusive procedure, but then I came up with a package procedure that was really efficient and she comes up to me saying: I heard you created a very efficient package procedure and I just ignored her, because I knew she was full of it and then she says: I am trying to give you a compliment! She was trying to give me a compliment my ass, she was seeing what else she could come up with to bring me down. She has everyone fooled, but she never had me fooled from day one, I knew I could not trust her. 

The quote below also articulates exactly what the property manager did. Totally she wanted to destroy me! And she got the new guy and the Security Company to finished the job she started, she is talented!!! 


Thank you to you both for being my friends.
Hugs with love,

 Sylvie

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge  

Friday, February 13, 2015

The Ultimate Betrayal

Hi Sylvie,

I am so sorry to hear about what has happened this week.  I can’t even begin to understand, and I really want you to know how much we miss your smiling face each day.  This just does not make any sense,
A

Dear A,

Thank you for writing. I was treated by S board and the Security Company like I was a criminal, of the worst type. The Security Company left a message on my voice mail Monday afternoon not to report to work the next day, that if I did, I would be escorted off the property. I even was not allowed in, to retrieve my personal lap top and other belongs. The Security Company still has my personal staff, because I don’t want to go alone to pick them up. I need to ask someone, preferable a man, to go with me.

This has been one of my worst experiences of my life. But it showed me the true colors of some people at S board, especially of the ones on the present board. Read my personal blogs if you like to get the full scoop of the emotional harassment I went through by S Board and the Security Company. This all started right after my book was published. My book is a mirror and they don’t like their own reflections. I already have a new job and if all goes well I will be working again by next Thursday.
Thank you for your support over the years and for caring.

My best wishes to you and everyone you love,

Sylvie

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Experienced Knowledge

Hi S,
Thank you for writing.


You are very welcome, being helpful to people, all beings, not just people, is my nature wherever I am at.
They terminated me without given me a reason. But I know the reason. I triggered P’s jealousy and she manipulated the very weak and very emotionally blind present board and all plotted against me. Some Rs wanted me to take P's place when she retires this Christmas, I always said I didn’t want her job, besides going in and out and gossiping and plotting against others, she does nothing! But I guess she could not handle just the thought of me taking her place.


Just like I wrote to Mrs. A a few weeks ago:
"Hi Mrs. A
I am pretty sure I am being a target of a sociopath at work and I think you know who I am talking about.  I triggered her jealousy and now she is going to use her last year at work to manipulate things to make me look like I am crazy and unstable and make her appear to be the bigger and saner person. I am going to try to be careful and watch my back and keep my distance from her and see if I can survive her last year. Otherwise I might have to look for another job.

Below is an article about sociopaths if you have time to read it. I am her target and once a sociopath targets you, you can’t win and the only way to keep your sanity is to stay away from them.  This is why she didn’t share your e-mail with all the board members and just shared it with the one in charge of security,  because in this way she has fewer people to persuade and keeps more control. The board member that is in charge of security right now is totally emotionally blind and will never see through her games and will play him like a mouse.
 I see the games people play so clear!

Thank you for listen and see you tomorrow,

Sylvie"

I am not sure if I will be available to take care of your house this summer, but let’s talk when you are about to leave.
Best wishes,

Sylvie

P.S if you like to know more of all the scoop of what went down. You are welcome to read my blog posts below, this is another reason P and the X Board were uncomfortable with me, because they know I see through them all. I have too much experienced knowledge.
Stalking the Soul
Emotional Abuse in the Workplace
Silencing and Suppressing others to Manage Repressed Fears 
Rise Above the Sociopaths' Bullshit
I am the Target of a Sociopath
They are Allergic to my Aliveness
The Ultimate Betrayal
Cowards always get Others to do the Dirty Work for Them
They showed me the Truth of their own Childhoods 
You are not Alone
My First Day on the New Job 
Proof of one of the Sociopaths’ plotting
Driven by Jealousy to Hurt Others 
Sociopaths or Evil People what they Fear the most is the Light 
Empathic people are natural targets for sociopaths - protect yourself
I Guess the Shoe Fits Him
Tough Decision to Make
Love and Freedom Experienced in Childhood that Turn us into Compassionate Adults
Sign the Circumcision Authorization Papers Young Lady
Expressing our Fears
Narcissists or Sociopaths Want to Destroy Anything that is Good
Reasons Sociopaths and Narcissist people make you a Target
Germanwings Plane Crash
Forgiveness is a Trap
Sociopaths and Narcissists Make sure they get to the Crowd Early
Narcissists
Hurting others to keep Childhood Repression Intact
Free Speech in America is an Illusion
Open Letter to the Media
Preaching Forgiveness is Another Form of Abuse
Mobilizing all Forces to Discredit Former Victims
The World Is Full of Enablers like Mrs. Cosby
They Are Criminals
Gaslighting
That’s all she ever did pass the buck and cover her ass
It Was An Attempt of a Psychological Lynching
Reenactment
Narcissism Comes from Pain Suffered in Childhood
Never Trust a Person that Proclaims to Having Wonderful Parents and Childhood
Narcissists are Secretly Suicidal and Homicidal
Sadly the World is Full of Charlatans that Keep us Distracted and Numb 
The World is in a Real Serious Trouble
We Live in a Word of Lies
Most People out there are Prostituting Themselves Everyday 
Enablers are Just as Guilty 
Psychological Warfare
Risking Safety for a Cause Bigger than Me
Don’t Show your Vulnerability to Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths  
It’s an Upside Down World
Freedom Ain't Free
Better Alone Than Being a Scapegoat 
The Pope is Fooling Himself and Others with the Illusion of Love
Aligning the Mind with the Heart
6 Signs You’re Arguing With A Psychopath
Facebook post About the Bank Robber in Chandler Arizona
Hornets’ Nest of Corruption
Secrets to a Long Life
Bird's Eye View
Sociopaths Hate Us
For a sociopath, winning is all
The Word "Safety" with Regard to Women
White supremacists urge trolling Clinton supporters to suicide
America Was Blinded by Sexism and Misogyny to Vote for a Fascist
Donald Trump Provides the Scapegoats People Desperately Need
I Get a Little Satisfaction
Psychopaths/Sociopaths Belief that just like them Non-Psychopaths Can’t Change Either
Donald Trump Is Gaslighting America
Donald Trump is Grabbing America by the Pussy
Vulnerable Women Always Gets the short End of the Stick
The Propaganda Spread by the Established Media is the Most Damaging
This Article Sums it Up Pretty Good about Donald Trump and All of Us
Donald Trump is Stalking the Soul of America
A sociopath will attempt to drain you of everything
The Silence from the Media is Deafening
They do Have Blood on their Hands
The Lie We Live
Scapegoating
Terrorism is the War of the Poor and War is the Terrorism of the Rich
The Roots of Sexism and Hate for Women
I’m used to people trying to put me in my place! First of all I’m not ashamed of my past. I was an honest and a clean dancer. I enjoyed dancing, having a fit body from all the dancing and of course enjoyed the extra money! If dancing was still clean like it was in the mid-80s and 90s and I was still young! I would be doing it right NOW! I was a lot safer working as a dancer than I was in my so called “real” job of nine and half years. While I was a dancer, I never was emotionally harassed by mob of sociopaths like I was in my so called “real” job!
Renewing my Nursing License
We are all Prisoners of our Childhood
The Conversation About the Effects of Childhood Repression Needs to Start Happening in the Stage of the World
Letter from the Director of Correspondence of Hillary Clinton
The Wall of Silence is Everywhere
The Roots of Most People Hate for Hillary Clinton
Donald Trump and his Followers Are Stuck in the Diaper Stage
The Media is Like a Deer Caught in the Headlights
Why 2016 Was the Year the Feminist Bubble Burst
A sociopath will attempt to drain you of everything
The Lie We Live
Why Males Are More Violent
Most people's objective in life is to one day own their own slaves
We Women Are not Allowed to Express Anger
Know Your Enemy
Arizona Senator Jeff Flake
Hurting Others is the Malignant Narcissist Pain Killing Drug
Big Cover up by the Sociopaths at my ex job, FBI and the US Marshals
The Fascist Way
Facing Racism and Discrimination

Monday, February 9, 2015

My New Website Just went Live!


I spent the weekend recovering from an emotional hangover from dealing with sociopaths during the week.

If I had not resolved my childhood repression the present betrayal would have triggered the repressed emotions of the child I once was and I would have been blinded by them to act against myself and lose it emotionally AND I would have been exactly where the present sociopaths wanted me to be, so they could declare me mentally instable.

But I am excited that in spite of being attacked  by sociopaths! I was able to finish my new website with the help of DT Design Studio in Phoenix and it just went live!!!!

Check it out www.sylvieshene.com

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Stalking the Soul

In the excerpt below from the book Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and the Erosion of Identity, by Marie France Hirigoyen  articulates beautifully what S board, MB and Security Company did and are doing to me. They want to murder my soul like they own parents or childhood care givers murdered their own souls, so I will be soulless like them.


"Physical violence can be testified to be outside evidence: eyewitness, police and medical reports. With emotional abuse, there is no proof. It's a clean violence. Nobody sees anything. 


                                                            The Victim is Cornered

During the ascendancy of control phase, the emotional abuser essentially acted to inhibit his victim’s powers of reasoning and critical judgment. In the next phase, through a strategic series of commands, he provokes feelings, acts, and reactions.

If the opponent can “outdo” his rival in abusive defense strategies, the battle can only end in the surrender of the less perverse of the two.

The abuser tries to make the victim act against him so he can denounce her as “evil.” What’s crucial is that she seem responsible for what happened. He uses a weakness---a depressive, hysterical, or temperamental tendency--- over-exaggerates this trait, and then leads the victim on to discredit herself. Pushing the other into making mistakes allows the abuser to criticize and tear her down, but even more, reinforces her poor self-image and guilt.

When the victim loses control, the abuser simply injects a small dose of provocation and contempt to obtain a reaction, and later reproaches her for it. If, for example, the reaction is anger, he makes sure that everyone sees it. On occasion, an outsider might even feel compelled to call the police. One even sees cases of abusers egging their victims on: “poor thing, you can’t expect anything from life; I don’t know why you haven’t jumped out the window!” It’s easy after that for the abuser to make the victim a mental case.

The victim needs to act, but because she is blocked by the hold over her, she can only find her freedom in an extreme gesture. To an outsider, any impulsive action, especially a violent one, is considered pathological. The person reaction to provocation seems responsible for the crises. Guilt in the eyes of the abuser; she appears like the aggressor to outsiders, who don’t understand that she can no longer live trapped in a horrible situation. Whatever she does, she can’t set herself free: if reacts, she is responsible for starting the conflict, and is she doesn’t react, the deadly stalking of her soul continues.  

As he drives his victim to destruction, the abuser gets that much more pleasure from pointing out her weakness or unleashing her violence. He makes her feel debased and unworthy. Depending on her reaction, she is described as temperamental and neurotic, alcoholic, or suicidal. The victim feels defenseless and tries to justify herself as if she were, in fact, guilty. The abuser’s pleasure double: he bamboozles or humiliates his victim and subsequently rubs her nose in her humiliation.

While the victim dwells on her guilt, the abuser benefits from the situation, making sure to cast himself as the victim.

Justification becomes impossible when nothing is said and no reproach is made. Desperate to find a solution to this horrifying impasse, the victim may be tempted in turn to use innuendo and manipulation. The relationship then becomes ambiguous: who is the abuser and who the victim.   

The ideal outcome for the abuser is to succeed in making the other “evil,” which transforms the evil into something more normal because it is now shared. He wants to inject the other with what is bad in him. To corrupt is the ultimate goal.

His greatest satisfaction lies in driving his target to destructive acts or, in a larger framework, leading several individuals to finish each other off. (This is what S board did, they started the emotional harassment and now is leaving it to MB and S to finish it off)

All abusers, sexual or emotional, try to drag others into their orbit and distort the rules. Their destructive capability depends on the propaganda they disseminate among victims’ families, friends, and associates, showing to what extent the victims are “evil” and that it is therefore normal to blame them. Sometimes they succeed and seduce allies by ridiculing and scorning moral values. Not leading others into a circle of violence means failure for abusers and, therefore, becomes the only way to stop the spread of the abusive process.

From the book Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and the Erosion of Identity by Marie –France Hirigoyen page, 120, 121 and 122

Yes, I had my soul stalked for over six months at my last job by pure evil people. The words below articulate exactly what happened to me!


Emotional abuse defined: "These are evil psychological assaults. This aggression arises from an unconscious psychological process of destruction consisting of either hidden or overt hostility on the part of one and sometimes several abusers toward a designated person; a real target in every sense of the word. It is effectively possible to destabilize or even destroy someone with seemingly harmless words and hints, inferences and unspoken suggestions; usually those close to the situation will not intervene. A narcissistic abuser grows in stature at the expense of the other; she also avoids any inner or spiritual conflict by shifting the responsibility for what is wrong onto the other person. If the other is responsible for the problem, wrong-doing, guilt and suffering don't exist. This defines emotional abuse."

"The very definition of emotional abuse is challenged by some who prefer to use the catch-all term of psychopathy."

""Whether the subject is serial killing or emotional abusiveness, the matter remains one of predatory behavior: an act consisting in the appropriation of another person's life."

-Dr. Marie-France Hirigoyen from "Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and the Erosion of Identity"



Book Review: Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and The Erosion of Identity 
"Yet, really? No victims? In relationships that serve only one party? That is the popular wisdom and the frequent conclusion of many psychologies. Therapists are trained to remain neutral even when obvious emotional abuses are played out in front of them. Infidelities and narcissistic emotional abuses are not considered serious enough to warrant speaking out in favor of the victim. Then, there is the truth that we as a culture hold the victim to blame for whatever occurred to attempt to make sense of, to impose rationale onto a world that often does not make a lot of sense. Well, dispense with such New Age ideas that absolve all relational wrongs such as: “there are no guilty parties, only accomplices in the outcome.” What if it is just plain wrong to abuse the trust of another, especially someone in an intimate relationship? What if deception—of any sort—is abusive? What if using another person for one's own gains—even if that using is unconscious—is wrong? Just plain wrong. Wrong as in: not condoned, no neutrality accepted in the face of abuses and deceptions. This book calls for an end to therapeutic neutrality and directs therapists to cease listening dispassionately and to actively speak up and even to intervene when abuse is observed. What if a morality of protecting the less powerful person in relationships is developing? This book calls for an end of therapeutic dispassion and a return of empathy and kindness, a sort of patient championing, yes—taking sides. What if there really are perpetrators in relationships? And what if those perpetrators have real victims, sometimes many victims? Now, that would be an entirely new way of exploring relationships."
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"Stalking the Soul" will illuminate emotional abuse in a way that will shake you to the core. Marie-France Hirigoyen has insight that is usually reserved for those who have walked the path. I was impressed with the depth of her knowledge of narcissism and the insidious and covert nature of the disorder. Emotional abuse is a double-edged sword because it is so hard to prove. You'll go crazy just trying. The abuser is careful to reveal himself only to his victim while showing his false self, the one that hooked you, to everyone else. Manipulation is second nature to the emotional abuser, allowing him to slowly and methodically erode your sense of self and to murder your soul. The latter being their goal. You have become their prey, some'thing' to conquer. I immensely appreciated and respected Marie-France Hirigoyen careful avoidance and rejection of blaming the victim. She shows in compassionate detail how it is your very strengths and talents that make you perfect prey to a narcissist, not your weakness, as so many other books on the subject will have you believe. Blaming the victim is just another layer of abuse and this author discredits that theory with a few strokes of her mighty pen. She appears to have an intimate understanding of the inner workings of a mental abuser and her knowledge flows freely from the pages directly to you. Where it is the abuser's goal to destabilize, Marie-France Hirigoyen is the friend who lovingly shakes
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Tina Jensen Friis: Very interesting read about abusers and their ways, - how it will always be the victims fault and making the victim look like "the abuser", even a mental case to others, - a pointless battle where you ultimately must learn that people can think what they want - escaping and surviving the abuse is all that matters!
"The ideal outcome for the abuser is to succeed in making the other “evil,” which transforms the evil into something more normal because it is now shared. He wants to inject the other with what is bad in him. To corrupt is the ultimate goal."
"The abuser is careful to reveal himself only to his victim while showing his false self, the one that hooked you, to everyone else. Manipulation is second nature to the emotional abuser, allowing him to slowly and methodically erode your sense of self and to murder your soul."
The pain will always remain inside....


Sylvie Imelda Shene Thank you, Tina. Yes the abuser’s goal is to succeed in making the real victim appear to be the “evil” one and therefore deserving what was coming to her. I lost my job, but she [the property manager at my last job] did not succeed in transferring her evil into me. The quote below describes beautifully what she was trying to do, she wanted to kill my soul and walk away wearing my skin. 
I shared more about my experiences and quotes in this link.



                                       No, I will never look at anyone the same way!

Also read my blog post Experienced Knowledge