Thursday, March 5, 2015

Hurting others to keep Childhood Repression Intact

Since writing this blog, exactly a year later, my ex-boss, who the property manager recruited to do her dirty work, killed himself in a standoff with the local police after robbing a bank on March 11, 2016, that by coincidence was my birthday! So, the property manager does have blood on her hands after all, because I know without a doubt, if she had not started this psychological warfare against me, he would still be alive – he was her collateral damage – when people start wars someone always gets hurt or killed!!! I was her target to destroy, but when was one of her helpers to lose his mind and self-destruct, everyone involved became silent, and now is a big cover-up that involves the FBI, the US Marshals, and the media. It's a shame he was not strong enough to stand up to do the right thing and let himself become a puppet of the property manager -- he paid a high price for it. Puppets never have a good end. If it was me, the little woman to commit a crime my name and face would have been splashed all over the news stations! And then all probably go on TV talking about how disturbed the little woman was -- to discredit me and my book -- and make a name for themselves by standing on my head. And all probably say that you need God in your life, my ex-boss was a Mormon, a man of God, but he was the one to lose his mind, but now is a big cover-up. I could see their dirty games and traps so clearly.
Read more in the link below:  


People that Refuse to Explore their own history will make innocent people their scapegoats.

Talking on the phone with an ex-resident from S, he asked me what I thought might have happened to PP in order to want to destroy me like she did. And I said: I am not sure, because the 9 and half years we worked together and the subject of childhood would come up, she could never talk about it, it was a big taboo for her and if I kept talking about childhood, she would get very uncomfortable and leave. I am very aware that people that can’t talk about childhood can’t be trusted because there is a big chance their repression can be triggered and they will try to make you their scapegoat.

And no doubt my book triggered her own repression and instead of taking responsibility for it, she rather destroy me  and kill my soul like her childhood abusers killed her own soul when she was a defenseless little child, so she can keep the idealization of her parents,  childhood, and repression intact. 

And then while talking on the phone with my friend, the image of her father entered in my mind. 

I met her father a few times, he had a lady that lived with him in the same assisted living retirement home, where he lived, that used to live in Brazil and spoke Portuguese, so because I am Portuguese, they invited me to have lunch with them, her father kind of fell in love with me, and he wanted me to meet them for lunch on the weekends often, he was a very charming man that I could tell had perverted sexuality and poor sexual boundaries because when saying goodbye to me after having lunch, he would give me a hug and he made sure he could feel my breasts a little bit. I didn't think much of it at the time, but now, I have no doubt in my mind she was sexually molested by her father when she was a child. And now I had to pay and suffered for what her father did to her when she was a defenseless little child.

My response below to Elza’s comment on a facebook post come to mind:
Elza, labeling people as inferior and comparing them to animals might make you feel better about yourself temporally and superficially, but does nothing to help stop these atrocities, but actually is a cover-up for the real causes and perpetuates the vicious circle to continue endlessly. Yes, they lack feelings, but only because their true authentic feelings were suppressed in childhood and yes, they are cowards only because they are too afraid to look in their past and see their parents or childhood caregivers as they really were and to keep the idealization of their parents and childhood intact, they endless unconsciously and compulsively reenact their childhood traumas in the present moment making others suffer for the wrongs done to them when they were defenseless little children. You never want to talk about the past, and I am sure Dr. Julio Machado vaz doesn’t like to look at his past either, but ignoring our childhood truth keeps us stuck living in the past without realizing it and makes us act destructively even though we don’t want to do so. People abusing others has nothing to do with character but with the fact they themselves were mistreated in childhood without being able to defend themselves. I explain these psychological mechanisms very well in my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions.

Also read Experienced Knowledge

Comments on this post from Facebook 

Monica Chelagat A brief reflection on this post comparing with my own personal experience which is very different in the cause behind. In the previous related posting, you mention a person who was interested in your [job] which in my understanding is not PP. If so, PP was instrumental a sick opportunist but was not the cause. The mobbing I went through at the was Institutional but at the formal managerial level. Each character that joined in the lynch either was incited with lies or was a sociopath who capitalized on the blackmail against me and inevitably feels threatened on my defense reactions. It is complicated. It is important to understand why and who started once that is clear you can address it externally and inside you. I have done work and feel better overall. Addressing it is the best 'therapy'.

Sylvie Imelda Shene PP and another resident at the community where I worked started the plotting and MB, a new guy that was taking the place of a guy that died of heart failure, he wanted my job and saw me vulnerable, so joined in the plotting to steal my job. When I thought I had a battle won, another sociopath would take over and continue the emotional harassment the first sociopaths started. I was being attacked by sociopaths from every angle. They wanted to kill my soul to keep their own repression intact and some just for their own personal gain.
Read my blog post Stalking the Soul


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