Saturday, November 21, 2015

Don’t Show your Vulnerability to Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths

This is what makes the property manager and her flocks at my last job so evil! Because after reading my book, they knew my history and they were confident, they could regress me to my childhood wounds and make me lose my mind, so they could say: I always have been messed up and discredit me so they could go on with their facades, lies, and illusions, as usual, they rather destroy me than face their own painful truths. I never have seen pure evil like I did at my last job. You would think to work in an upscale gated community I would be safer from evil than dancing in a nightclub, but in my 18 years as a dancer, I never saw pure evil directed at me like that.

Facebook comment

Monica Chelagat Absolutely right Sylvie. It was the same for me. I couldn't share with anyone not to show my vulnerability, but all the same, she/they used a colleague who they chose to 'assist' me or team up with me to monitor to my stability in my private life. Really awful they were. So this post very well expresses that experience too for me.






Facebook comments

Monica Chelagat The worst trauma is invisible, it subjects the victim to suffer even more in isolation with the ignorant ones labeling as playing the victim. I have received hints on such an annoying attitude.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Yes, Monica, emotional abuse is worse, if I had been shot in retaliation for writing my book sharing my life experiences and psychological discoveries, I would have the attention and sympathy of the whole world, but because the violence I suffered to try to silence me was psychological nobody cares.

Monica Chelagat It is difficult to keep it all inside you, I am sorry I had to expose what I went through and may have lost much sympathy from former colleagues and friends. But it was more important and healing for me to speak it out. Those that have let or avoid me were not friends after all. The real ones remain, always.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Yes Monica, it's important to speak up and not keep it inside to protect our physical and mental health, even if no one is listening and understands. It's the repression that can be dangerous to our physical and mental health.

Steve Thomas People can really stink sometimes. Hang in there, Sylvie.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Thank you, Steve, for your support and the courage to stand by me!

Steve Thomas Not a matter of courage. But it's been a long time since that happened, I hadn't said anything and I decided I couldn't live anymore with being your Shittiest Most Worthless Facebook Friend. (little attempt at humor, there. You don't have to laugh, it's okay.)

Seriously, nobody needs to tell you that time absolutely does *not* heal all wounds, and it's definitely possible you can find better advice than this, but I think I might know kind of what you're feeling. Ridiculous as it sounds, the only 'advice' or 'support' that anybody ever gave me that made a dime's worth of difference during bad times was 'Hang in there'. So that's what I wrote. Doesn't take courage.


Sylvie Imelda Shene I’m laughing! smile emoticon Steve. The mob of sociopaths at my last job didn't hurt me emotionally! Emotionally I’m stronger than ever!!! Maybe my memory got affected a little bit. The only real difference is that I used to give people the benefit of a doubt, but now I don’t any longer give them the benefit of a doubt and take the red flags and my gut feelings very seriously! I post a lot about my experiences with narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths, because I want to expose these evil people, acting as if personality, pretending to be human and good people, but are wolves in sheep’s clothes, yes I did lose half of my income and I’m struggling financially a little bit, because I took a loan to pay for the book publishing costs, because the Indiegogo campaign only raised about $6000, the rest of the contributions were all mine!!! And until I pay off the loan payment of $470 every month, it’s tough for me. I was not comfortable running a campaign to raise the money, because I’m used to people giving me shit I don’t need or I don’t give a damn about to impress me, manipulate me and fool me to like them, but when something is really important to me and I really care about, they pretend not to see it and they ignore it, but my co-writer convinced me to run the campaign, he said that I work so hard and I should allow people to help me sometimes, he was still very naive about the true nature of most people, but working with me on my book and my experience at my last job, I think it has helped him open his eyes to see the true nature of most people.


Very true! The fact that I was getting good reviews on my book was one of the major reasons that drove the property manager to try to destroy me, so she could discredit me and be the bigger girl again.

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge  

Friday, November 13, 2015

Risking Safety for a Cause Bigger than Me

Facebook comments on the post below

Your kind of thinking fits in with the majority in our society that allows the sociopaths and narcissists go Scot free and puts the blame on the real victims. Yes, if I had not written a book, I probably would not have been a target of the sociopaths and I would be safe in my comfort zone because I would never have triggered the sociopaths' jealousy and fears of exposure, but that doesn't mean I deserved it! Just like when people blame the woman for being raped, because of the clothes she was wearing or she was in the wrong place or should not have been out that late. Because a woman should be at home. Women have the right to go out into the world like anyone else. Now, tell me what children and animals do to deserve all the torture and exploitation we witness in this world? The reason I work so hard and risk my own life to expose the sociopaths, narcissists, and psychopaths in our world is to protect the most vulnerable in our society, children, and animals.



Very true! This is exactly what a mob of sociopaths at my last job of nine and half years was trying to do to me after I published my book, so they could declare me mentally unstable and discredit me. I could see so clearly what they were trying to do that they didn't get the reactions from me they were hoping for. And the sociopaths and their flocks are the ones looking bad. I know they all are hating me for removing their masks. I still go there to do private work for some residents with my head up and I look at the sociopaths and their flocks right in the eyes, but they look down and pretend not to see me.

Monica Chelagat A colleague so obsessed by me did the same thing, I was amazed how a who unit of over 20 or 30 colleagues many of whom I thought had known me enough suddenly were anti-me and betrayed me in the end year divisional performance reviews where the who division of professional staff met to discuss individual support staff performance. Very harmful these sneaky characters and how easy it is for people to abandon an innocent colleague without understanding the background. I have no doubt these people are so miserable.

Sylvie Imelda Shene I'm sure they are all miserable too, especially the property manager, the original instigator. The reason they target us is to transfer their misery into us, so we are as miserable as them, but i no longer take in others misery projected at me.

Sharon Tan sorry, if I may ask: do you easily or immediately recognize a narcissist or it takes time to figure them out, by which time, the damage may have been done.

Sharon Tan  Also, what do you think if I tell you that each and every one of us attracts people of sorts depending on our general energy as well as that energy we have at any moment in life.

Sylvie Imelda Shene I'm no longer blind to the red flags and I recognize a narcissistic from a mile away, and I don't allow myself to get too close to one, but in the workplace are hard to avoid and not always easy to stay under the radar of the narcissistic/sociopath. The reason the narcissistic\sociopath targeted me at my last job of nine and half years, was because after I published my book it triggered her jealousy to a boiling point and was driven by it to try to destroy me so could declare me mentally unstable and discredit my life's work. 
As for answering your last question, I recommend you read my book A Dance to Freedom your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions 

Sharon Tan: ok, thank you for the time and thought to answer me. My questions may seem quite lame to you, But, you see, perhaps I was born lucky in life and I am sure I see my life in another circle of thought. In any case, I truly can understand what you have had to go through. Best wishes for good things to come.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Your kind of thinking fits in with the majority in our society that allows the sociopaths and narcissists go Scot free and puts the blame on the real victims. Yes, if I had not written a book, I probably would not have been a target of the sociopaths and I would be safe in my comfort zone because I would never have triggered the sociopaths' jealousy and fears of exposure, but that doesn't mean I deserved it. Just like when people blame the woman for being raped, because of the clothes she was wearing or she was in the wrong place or should not have been out that late. Because a woman should be at home. Women have the right to go out into the world like anyone else. Now, tell me what children and animals do to deserve all the torture and exploitation we witness in this world? The reason I work so hard and risk my own life to expose the sociopaths, narcissists, and psychopaths in our world is to protect the most vulnerable in our society, children, and animals.




To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge  









Thursday, November 5, 2015

Psychological Warfare

Yes, that's what the sociopaths at my last job of nine and half years were trying to do, but they messed with the wrong person. They were too emotionally blind to see that I could see what they were trying to do. 

I guess they didn't believe what i wrote in my book. 

I see very clearly the traps people put in front of me and I no longer can be fooled by their mind games. 

They thought there was no way a gate attendant, a nobody in their eyes, could be smarter than them. 

I always knew I was surrounded by evil masquerading as good and nice people and I was very aware that they could turn against me. 

There's is no such thing as good and bad people. The property manager used to come to the gate all the time ant bad mouth the residents she didn’t like, because they would stand up to her, she loved to label them as bad people and I used to think to myself: you are not better than them. There are unconscious or repressed people acting as if personality pretending to be good people that can turn against you at any time and doing their evil acts behind closed doors without witnesses, and there are unconscious people that can't act or pretend and they do their evil acts in the open and usually get caught and end up in jail. And of course there are a few of us that have taken responsibility for our own childhood repression and come from a place of honesty and authenticity. 

Just like I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions: “The people who try to use and manipulate me usually realize their mistake pretty quickly, and either apologize or head for the hills. My liberation has definitely given me added protection against sociopaths! 

Resolving childhood repression is the vaccine against the charlatans of the world who exploit those who are still emotionally blinded by the unresolved, repressed emotions of the children they once were. 

Once you’re free, your whole outlook on life is going to change. This quote, from a patient of Alice Miller’s, expresses what happens perfectly: “The world has not changed. There is so much evil and meanness all around me, and I see it even more clearly than before. However, for the first time, I find life really worth living. Perhaps this is because, for the first time, I have the feeling that I am really living my own life. And that is an exciting adventure. On the other hand, I can understand my suicidal ideas better now, especially those I had in my youth — when it seemed pointless to carry on — because in a way I had always been living a life that wasn’t mine, that I didn’t want, and that I was ready to throw away.”80 I’ve removed all the barriers of false morality and am totally free to experience all my feelings, take them seriously and decide whom, if anyone, to share them with. I’ve faced my past and can deal with my present circumstances in the context of growing awareness instead of childhood fears. These words by Alice Miller express how I exactly feel: “If I allow myself to feel what pains or gladdens me, what annoys or enrages me, and why this is the case, if I know what I need and what I do not want at all costs, I will know myself well enough to love my life and find it interesting, regardless of age or social status. … I will know that I have lived my own, true life.”81 

It really is a powerful feeling, and you’re likely to find yourself possessing a power that will be threatening to a lot of people. Society is on the side of the status quo, so be prepared. As Alice Miller writes in Free from Lies, going against the parents “is a source of major alarm for others … They will sometimes mobilize all the forces at their command to discredit the former victim and thus keep their own repression intact.”82 But thanks to Alice Miller, I’m content to be who I am regardless of what other people think. This passage, from Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, sums it up so well: “To live with one’s own truth is to be at home with oneself. That is the opposite of isolation. We only need confirmation when we are alienated from ourselves and in flight from the truth. All the friends and devoted admirers in the world cannot make up for the loss.”83 When I die I will not be sad because I have truly lived and will die in freedom, no longer scared and no longer a captive of the emotional prison into which I was born.” Page 172 and 173

Yes, the quote above describes the  property manager to a tooth.

Comments from the share of this post on Facebook.

Sylvie Imelda SheneToday I waved at an asshole! I’m cat sitting at the community where I used to work and while driving in, I saw one of the assholes that behind closed doors were in on the plot to destroy me. I believe he used to work for the government, I think he was in the CIA or the FBI, I guess he was well trained in psychological welfare and I guess he too was confident that they could get me to self-destruct with their mind games. I looked at him and I waved! He looked and when he saw it was me, he put his hand up and drove away. I could tell he was very uncomfortable, because he knows what they did to me was evil!

Monica Chelagat Good for you! This is their life: Constantly uncomfortable...

Sylvie Imelda Shene I'm sure they all feel like a failure that their little plot to destroy me didn't work. And they all look like assholes! They wanted me to look bad, but they end up looking bad themselves. All of my life people's number one mistake has always been underestimating me.

Monica Chelagat I read your responses and amazingly I could have written the same for the tremendous abuse I went through. The only difference is I survived the intentions of firing me. In 1998 a brainwashed chief of the unit I was working under his management accepted to fire me, I wasn't even working for him directly but he by passed my supervisors al based on lies by the asshole or assholes he felt were important in his power management). I came back from my summer leave and there commotion I didn't realise what had happened then I discovered through a reliable colleague. Their plans shamefully failed thank to the HR Chief at the time she did not let it happen. She realised the viciousness in the injustice done to me. I am sorry there was no one like this to rescue you but at least you left uncompromised. Much respecgt for you Sylvie, it must have been horrible but they are in a worse position than what you went through.

Sylvie Imelda Shene I’m sorry, Monica, you too went through this kind of emotional harassment in the work place. Yes, they are in worse place now. I know all their fears and disowned repressed feelings that they tried to transfer into me with their mind games, and for very short time I got to feel them and believe me they are very dark, but I gave them their fears and dark feelings back to them and because their plot to destroy me to manage their fears of facing their own repression didn't work, NOW those fears and all their dark feelings intensified big time, they wanted me to live their darkness and then they could appear to be the good and sane ones.

John Wilwerding I've experienced "Gas lighting as a child", I think parents think of it as a control technique without harm. Wrong.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Yes, John, sadly parents transfer their own unresolved repression “darkness” into their children and then when their children act out their own repression “darkness”, they punish their children. This is the biggest injustice I have witness in our world. Just as I wrote in my book page 84: “Children are like sponges. They absorb everything their parents repress. And because children are such perfect mirrors of their parents’ repression, they’re also powerful triggers that put parents into panic mode to keep repressing. No one can trigger in us what’s not already in ourselves, but many parents don’t want to see that because it would force them to feel the painful truths of their own childhoods that they try to avoid at all costs. Instead, parents force their children to feel what they themselves can’t feel. They use their children as scapegoats or “poisonous containers,” and endlessly punish them for their bad behavior. Most parents don’t take responsibility for the fact that, on some level, they’re the cause of their children’s bad behavior, due to their own repression. This is one of the biggest injustices I’ve ever witnessed in this world. And when this happens, parents lose the opportunity to nurture their children and heal their own hearts. This is very sad and tragic. Parents don’t realize that, in most cases, their desire to have children comes from their compulsion to reenact their own childhood dramas — not as victims again but as the oppressors, the ones in control. After all, that’s what they were taught when they were children themselves.”

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge