This blog is about learning to understand all of our feelings and learning to consciously face, feel and experience all of our feelings within the context of our own childhood.
Everything we become and happens to us is connected to childhood. Not every victim becomes an abuser, but every abuser was once a victim of abuse, these are facts, Violence is not genetic, it’s learned.
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2014/08/a-dance-to-freedom-book-reviews.html
Wednesday, November 13, 2024
The Golden Child
A "golden child" is a child who is treated as exceptional by their family, often with excessive praise and special treatment. The term is often used to describe a child who is expected to be perfect, avoid mistakes, and excel at everything.
Golden children are often raised by narcissistic or controlling parents who create a toxic environment where the child feels unsafe expressing their own opinions. The child is expected to live up to unattainable levels of perfection and meet their parents' desires, even if they don't agree with them.
The role of the golden child can lead to a range of emotional and psychological challenges, including:
High stress levels
Perfectionism
Difficulty with independence
Anxiety
Depression
Relational difficulties
With therapy and self-reflection, it's possible to start to take more risks and stand up for yourself.
I went through this with a coworker no long ago. I knew what she was trying to do, to destabilize me by transferring her poison into me, but I just ignored it and eventually, all backfired on her.
"The ideal outcome for the abuser is to succeed in making the other “evil,” which transforms the evil into something more normal because it is now shared. He wants to inject the other with what is bad in him. To corrupt is the ultimate goal. His greatest satisfaction lies in driving his target to destructive acts or, in a larger framework, leading several individuals to finish each other off.
All abusers, sexual or emotional, try to drag others into their orbit and distort the rules. Their destructive capability depends on the propaganda they disseminate among victims’ families, friends, and associates, showing to what extent the victims are “evil” and that it is, therefore, normal to blame them.
Sometimes they succeed and seduce allies by ridiculing and scorning moral values. Not leading others into a circle of violence means failure for abusers and, therefore, becomes the only way to stop the spread of the abusive process." [Yes, I keep getting my soul stalked by pure evil.]
Emotional abuse defined: "These are evil psychological assaults. This aggression arises from an unconscious psychological process of destruction consisting of either hidden or overt hostility on the part of one and sometimes several abusers toward a designated person; a real target in every sense of the word.
It is effectively possible to destabilize or even destroy someone with seemingly harmless words and hints, inferences, and unspoken suggestions; usually, those close to the situation will not intervene.
A narcissistic abuser grows in stature at the expense of the other; she also avoids any inner or spiritual conflict by shifting the responsibility for what is wrong onto the other person. If the other is responsible for the problem, wrong-doing, guilt and suffering don't exist. This defines emotional abuse."
"The very definition of emotional abuse is challenged by some who prefer to use the catch-all term of psychopathy."
""Whether the subject is serial killing or emotional abusiveness, the matter remains one of predatory behavior: an act consisting in the appropriation of another person's life."
"The goal of abusive individual is to gain or maintain power by whatever means possible or else to mask his own incompetence.
In order to accomplish this, he must get rid of anyone who impedes his progress or sees through him." page 71
-Dr. Marie-France Hirigoyen "Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and the Erosion of Identity"
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