I. has to understand that the old tactics she used with L to get money no longer work because C won't let that happen.
I. has to let L and her money go. L doesn't care about her. L. and I. are at different ends of the same stick. There are Fxcked up people with money on one end and there are Fxcked people without money on the other end, but both are Fxcked up nevertheless, the only difference is one has money and the other doesn’t.
Have no doubts if I. was better off financially instead of C. L would be at I's house running away from her daughter. For L, money, status symbols, and being around people with financial success is what is most important to her, no matter if they have a heart or not!
If I. wants to save herself, she has to let L. and her money go and let go of the reins of control and leave everything behind. And start mourning all the things lost and what could have been but never was.
Even if I. could get money from L. would just buy her more time. She has to face the inevitable and the sooner the better.
Her health issues are caused by the pressure from all that she has been repressing all of her life and running from facing and feeling the painful truths in her life.
The moment she lets go of the reins of control and lets everything go her health will improve.
The words
below by Alice Miller are so true. The body never lies, It sticks to the facts.
“Inability to face up to the suffering undergone in childhood can be observed both in the form of religious obedience and in cynicism, irony, and other forms of self-alienation frequently masquerading as philosophy or literature. But ultimately the body will rebel. Even if it can be temporarily pacified with the help of drugs, nicotine, or medicine, it usually has the last word, because it is quicker to see through self-deception than the mind, particularly if the mind has been trained to function as an alienated self. We may ignore or deride the messages of the body, but its rebellion demands to be heeded because its language is the authentic expression of our true selves and of the strength of our vitality.” From the book “The Body Never Lies: The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting” by Alice Miller
Another truthful quote by Alice Miller comes to mind: “Children who have been beaten, humiliated, and abused, and who find no witness to come to their aid often develop a grave syndrome in later life: they have no knowledge of their true feelings, fear them like the plague, and are therefore incapable of recognizing vital connections.” — Alice Miller
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/05/swords-and-knives-review-of-alice.html
Maybe one of the secrets to living a long life is to be disconnected from one’s own truth and feelings, but it’s done at the expense of others and the next generations. When I was a kid I used to say to myself: the pain stops with me and I was willing to die than passing it into an innocent being. I much prefer resolving my own childhood repression to have a chance of living a long life than living a long life at the expense of others.
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