So true.
As the saying goes... when something is too good to be true it is because it's too good to be true!
Yes, I have the power to walk away and stay away. That's real power!
Yep! I see people connected all the time by fear, hatred, and money, but seldom do I see people connected by love.
Yep! They can't survive on their own no matter how much money the narcissist has... They constantly need a scapegoat or a poison container for projection or transference effect to temporarily and superficially alleviate their unresolved childhood repression.
Yep, I have learned to cut my losses and walk away from these people who just want to stand on my head to give them an advantage in the games people play and feel superior to others.
These words by Alice Miller could not be truer: "...like every psychopath, not at all interested in understanding himself, only in controlling, misleading and manipulating others. ..."
Very true. They are very cheap! They hate spending their money.
Once they show you who they really are and that they are choosing darkness walk away and let them be to meet their own future and destiny.
Yep! It's insane. We are the crop! Eventually, they will take everyone around them down with them
7 - Without Truth, there can be no Help
A great deal of understanding is shown for an unemployed father who beats his children. There is no problem understanding an overburdened executive who does the same thing, especially when he is irritated by his wife. The wife also meets with understanding when she can't help beating her child after the milk boils over. Page, 130
The Jungian doctrine of the shadow and the notion that evil is the reverse of good are aimed at denying the reality of evil. But evil is real. It is not innate but acquired, and it is never the reverse of good but rather its destroyer. Page, 142
Evil people
Our knowledge cannot alter them. They can change only if they sense, not merely intellectually but with their feelings, how they have been turned into evil people. Only then will they be able to remove the blockages and, by experiencing the blocked pain, liberate the abused child who had to wish to harm anyone on coming into the world, the child who wanted love but found no one to make that possible for him. All he found was barbed wire and walls on all sides, and he believed this to be the world. When he grew up he built gigantic worlds full of walls and barbed wire, or complicated philosophical and psychological systems, in the hope and expectation of receiving love in return, the love he never received from his parents when he was an 'unworthy life. Page, 143
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=banished+knowledge+
Our knowledge cannot alter them. They can change only if they sense, not merely intellectually but with their feelings, how they have been turned into evil people. Only then will they be able to remove the blockages and, by experiencing the blocked pain, liberate the abused child who had to wish to harm anyone on coming into the world, the child who wanted love but found no one to make that possible for him. All he found was barbed wire and walls on all sides, and he believed this to be the world. When he grew up he built gigantic worlds full of walls and barbed wire, or complicated philosophical and psychological systems, in the hope and expectation of receiving love in return, the love he never received from his parents when he was an 'unworthy life. Page, 143
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=banished+knowledge+
Yep! I see people connected all the time by fear, hatred, and money, but seldom do I see people connected by love.
Yep!
Yes, malignant covert narcissists are the most dangerous.
Yep! Because they are too afraid to walk away and be alone to do their emotional work to resolve their own childhood repression, so they become like the people they grew up with and hated so much.
Yep! They can't survive on their own no matter how much money the narcissist has... They constantly need a scapegoat or a poison container for projection or transference effect to temporarily and superficially alleviate their unresolved childhood repression.
Very true!
Yep! I'm so glad there are no narcissists in my life right now, it's so peaceful. I don't make a good supply so they don't want me in their lives. If they had their wishes I would be in jail, mental hospital, or dead. They hate the existence of people like me. The existence of people like me ruins the wicked, evil manipulative games they play to exploit the emotionally blind people in this world.
No, it's not my job.
With my book and all my writings, I give people the map and keys to liberate themselves, if they ever find the courage to do their emotional work --- the most important work in a person's lifetime --- And leave the emotional prison of their childhood, as the quote below says this journey is theirs to take.
It takes courage to see, face, and feel our painful truths -- intelligence alone is not enough; but it rather helps create seductive rationalizations, theories, illusions, and lies to help us run from facing and feeling our own painful truths.
"You can't heal the people you love. You can't make choices for them. You can't rescue them.
You can promise that they won't journey alone. You can loan them your map. But this trip is theirs." Laura Jean Truman
Flying Monkeys, they suck. Walk away from the narcissist and his/her Flying Monkeys. Let them be to meet their own future and destiny.
Yep, they show us how they truly feel with their facial expressions and their disastrous reenactments -- it reveals the truth of their emotional state.
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=the+games+people+play
True. They can't deal with reality and face their own painful truths. They gather kill and be killed than face their own painful truths. They are doing everything in their power to avoid facing the pain that they were born into this world without love. So they settled for the illusion of love. As children, this illusion helped us survive but as adults, this illusion will keep us endlessly stuck in the emotional prison of our childhood.
These words by Alice Miller are so true: “We cannot really love if we are forbidden to know our truth, the truth about our parents and caregivers as well as about ourselves. We can only try to behave as if we were loving, but this hypocritical behavior is the opposite of love. It is confusing and deceptive, and it produces much helpless rage in the deceived person. This rage must be repressed in the presence of the pretended “love,” especially if one is dependent, as a child is, on the person who is masquerading in this illusion of love.” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self) Page 23
In this Interview "The Feeling Child" with Alice Miller by Diane Connors for OMNI Publications International in March 1987 --- Dr. Alice Miller says:
"Pain is the way to the truth. By denying that you were unloved as a child, you spare yourself some pain, but you are not with your own truth. And throughout your whole life, you'll try to earn love. In therapy, avoiding pain causes blockage. Yet nobody can confront being neglected or hated without feeling guilty. "It is my fault that my mother is cruel," he thinks. "I made my mother furious; what can I do to make her loving?" So he will continue trying to make her love him. The guilt is really protection against the terrible realization that you are fated to have a mother who cannot love. This is much more painful than thinking, "Oh, she is a good mother, it's only me who's bad." Because then you can try to do something to get love. But it's not true; you cannot earn love. And feeling guilty for what has been done to you only supports your blindness and your neurosis.
I try to reach the child in the readers and allow them to feel. I see my style as ranking keys. Everybody can take one so that they can go open their own door to find something. Or they can say no, I don't want to go through this door; I will return the key. I try to evoke feelings, and images. In this way, I offer keys to your own experience. You can then go look at your children and learn from them, not from me. Because only from your own experience can you really learn.
In my first studies, I was very abstract; I wanted to understand the most abstract ideas -- of Kant, Hegel, or Marx. My dissertation in philosophy was very abstract. Now I see that each philosopher had to build a big, big building in order not to feel his pain. Even Freud.
If a child has been molested and the therapist doesn't deny this fact, many things can open up in the patient. The therapist must not preach forgiveness, or the patient will repress the pain. He won't change, and the repressed rage will look for a scapegoat." Please read the full interview HERE.
"Pain is the way to the truth. By denying that you were unloved as a child, you spare yourself some pain, but you are not with your own truth. And throughout your whole life, you'll try to earn love. In therapy, avoiding pain causes blockage. Yet nobody can confront being neglected or hated without feeling guilty. "It is my fault that my mother is cruel," he thinks. "I made my mother furious; what can I do to make her loving?" So he will continue trying to make her love him. The guilt is really protection against the terrible realization that you are fated to have a mother who cannot love. This is much more painful than thinking, "Oh, she is a good mother, it's only me who's bad." Because then you can try to do something to get love. But it's not true; you cannot earn love. And feeling guilty for what has been done to you only supports your blindness and your neurosis.
I try to reach the child in the readers and allow them to feel. I see my style as ranking keys. Everybody can take one so that they can go open their own door to find something. Or they can say no, I don't want to go through this door; I will return the key. I try to evoke feelings, and images. In this way, I offer keys to your own experience. You can then go look at your children and learn from them, not from me. Because only from your own experience can you really learn.
In my first studies, I was very abstract; I wanted to understand the most abstract ideas -- of Kant, Hegel, or Marx. My dissertation in philosophy was very abstract. Now I see that each philosopher had to build a big, big building in order not to feel his pain. Even Freud.
If a child has been molested and the therapist doesn't deny this fact, many things can open up in the patient. The therapist must not preach forgiveness, or the patient will repress the pain. He won't change, and the repressed rage will look for a scapegoat." Please read the full interview HERE.
