Only Children are Abandoned

Let's make it clear: are you an adult? You feel abandoned when another person leaves you -- you are stuck in childhood without realizing it -- because only children are abandoned -- adults are left, not abandoned -- If we can understand and consciously feel this feeling of feeling abandoned within the context of your own childhood -- you will grow yourself up into a conscious adult. You will never again suffer when people leave you or ignore you.

Only children need and must have unconditional love and protection; it’s their birthright and parents’ obligation. But adults can never be loved unconditionally. You would not love a rapist or dictator. The love between adults needs to be earned. 

“As adults, we don’t need unconditional love, not even from our therapist. This is a childhood need that can never be fulfilled later in life, and we are playing with illusions if we have never mourned this lost opportunity. But there are other things we can get from a good therapist: reliability, honesty, respect, trust, empathy, understanding, and the ability to clarify their emotions so they need not burden us with them. If a therapist promises unconditional love, we must protect ourselves from him, from his hypocrisy and lack of awareness” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self) Page 45