Wednesday, June 12, 2024

9 signs someone is a low-quality person, according to psychology

It's interesting to me how many write great articles describing the minds of low-quality people, malignant people, or narcissists, but no one ever talks about the repressed emotions and why some people become malignant. 

Some people become malignant because they are not at all interested in understanding themselves, only in controlling, misleading, and manipulating others. 

It's not the traumas themselves that cause us long-term harm. It's the repressed emotions that cause us harm throughout our lives.

As long as people are too afraid to face their own painful truths and consciously feel the repressed emotions of the child they once were within the context of their own childhood, they will be driven by the dead hand of their own repression into the state of repetitive compulsion to endless reenact their disastrous childhood dramas and no matter what anyone says or does, or how well someone articulates great ideas and pretty theories -- nothing matters in this world -- humanity is on the path to self-destruct -- and with the aid of technology -- it's going to self-destruct much faster -- humanity it's doomed. And there is nothing anyone can do or say to change this.

The body never lies, It sticks to the facts.

"Only unflinching realization of one’s own past reality, of what really happened can break through the chain of abuse. If I know and can feel what my parents did to me when I was totally defenseless, I no longer need victims to befog my awareness. I no longer need to reenact what happened to me with the help of innocent people because now I KNOW what happened. And if I want to live my life consciously, without exploiting others, then I must actively accept that knowledge.
..Am I saying that forgiveness for crimes done to a child is not only ineffective but actively harmful? Yes, that is precisely what I am saying. The body does not understand moral precepts. It fights against the denial of genuine emotions and for the admission of the truth to our conscious minds. This is something the child cannot afford to do, it has to deceive itself and turn a blind eye to the parents’ crimes in order to survive. Adults no longer need to do this, but if they do, the price they pay is high. Either they ruin their own health or they make others pay the price – their children, their patients, the people who work for them, etc." -- Alice Miller

"9 signs someone is a low-quality person, according to psychology

2) They lack empathy

Another key sign of a low-quality person is a consistent lack of empathy.

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is a fundamental trait of high-quality individuals. It allows us to connect with others on a deep level and fosters meaningful relationships.

I remember an experience I had with a colleague a few years ago. We were working on a project together, and I had just received some bad news about a family member’s health. I was visibly upset, but instead of showing any concern or offering words of comfort, my colleague simply said, “Well, we still have work to do.”

This lack of empathy was not only shocking but also deeply hurtful. It was a clear demonstration that they were more interested in the project than my well-being.

When someone consistently fails to empathize with others, it’s likely a sign that they’re not the type of person you want in your life.

8) They’re always playing the victim

Playing the perpetual victim is another common trait of low-quality individuals. These are people who refuse to take responsibility for their actions and instead blame others for their misfortunes.

They often feel the world is against them, and they are forever caught in a cycle of misfortune that is never their fault. They fail to recognize that their actions and decisions contribute to their circumstances.

This constant victim mentality can be draining for those around them and shows a lack of self-awareness and responsibility, crucial elements of high-quality individuals.

9) They lack personal growth

Personal growth is a lifelong journey and a sign of a high-quality individual. Those who lack the willingness to grow, learn, and change are often stuck in their ways, unwilling to admit their shortcomings or seek improvement.

This stagnation can affect all areas of their life, from personal relationships to professional advancement. It shows a lack of ambition and contentment with mediocrity.

Remember, the desire for personal growth is not about being perfect; it’s about acknowledging that there’s always room for improvement. A person unwilling to grow is likely not the high-quality individual you want in your life.

Final thought: It’s about growth and respect

As we navigate through life, the relationships we form and the people we surround ourselves with play a significant role in shaping our experiences.

Recognizing the signs of low-quality individuals is not about labeling or judging others. Rather, it’s about understanding the behaviors that can harm our well-being and impede our growth.

At the heart of this understanding is a simple but profound concept: respect. Respect for ourselves, respect for others, and respect for the shared spaces we inhabit.

Remember, it’s not about finding perfect individuals. After all, we’re all a work in progress. But it’s about identifying those who are willing to grow, learn, and treat others with kindness and respect.

As you move forward, keep these signs in mind. Make room in your life for high-quality individuals who uplift you, inspire you, and respect you for who you are."

"Why Is It So Hard to Leave a Narcissist?

Six reasons people stay in narcissistic relationships.

5. We’ve gotten hooked on the push-and-pull Relationships with a narcissist have many highs and lows. “The common characteristic of all kinds of narcissistic love is mania,” said Dinić. Narcissism is often associated with a “game-playing love style.” One minute, our partner may be making us feel like the center of their universe. The next, we may seem like their last priority. A narcissist may give us little attention when we’re there for them, but confront us with big emotions when we’re not.

While we may feel overwhelmed, confused, or frustrated by this dynamic, we can also get hooked on it. The push and pull from the other person can make them more alluring. We may believe we need that passionate, exciting love back to feel worthy within ourselves. As one partner of a narcissist described it to me, “If I can get her to love me, then I am truly special.”

Because we feel lost and like we have nothing without the other person, we may stay with them and keep trying to get their spotlight back on us. This dynamic can be particularly enticing for people who experienced an insecure attachment pattern early in their lives where they felt they couldn’t get their needs met or didn’t feel consistently nurtured or loved. The intermittent reinforcement they get from a narcissist, in all its sparkly excessiveness, can feel like something they need in order to feel OK within themselves."
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