Right after I posted my comment on Elon Musk’s repost about the Minneapolis shooter, people began liking and sharing it. The truth was spreading. But suddenly, it stopped. The comment didn’t disappear, but it became invisible—buried by the algorithm. Elon had seen it, and he made sure no more eyes would land on it.
This is what Alice Miller called the wall of silence. In her book Breaking Down the Walls of Silence: The Liberating Experience of Facing Painful Truth, she wrote:
“Rather than take the risk, they prefer to forgo information that might be of life-death importance for coming generations. So in order not to have to call their own parents into question for a single moment, they cling to outdated, destructive opinions. …Clearly, the prospect of confronting one’s own personal history, in this case, is an alarming experience. And, as always, the fear of facts is stilled by a fascination with intellectual terms and abstractions aimed at concealing and masking the truth—the truth of facts that appear so threatening… At every attempt to share the new discoveries I made with the public, I ran up against the most determined resistance on the part of the media.”
That is what happened again. The truth—that childhood repression is the root cause of violence, and that tragedies like the Minneapolis shooting can only be prevented by facing that truth—was silenced. Musk, like so many before him, cannot bear to see his own reflection. He cannot allow others to see it either.
Children Turn Into Mirrors of Their Parents
The irony is striking. Parents who never resolve their own repression bring children into the world. And once those children grow, they reenact the same dynamics—often destroying their parents in old age the same way they were destroyed as children.
I have seen this in my own family. One of my nieces tracks her 84-year-old mother’s every move with technology, not out of care but out of greed. She wants to control the money and ensure no one else receives it. She pretends to be a caretaker, but her true concern is power. Watching her reminds me of Elon Musk and Donald Trump—men who project brilliance and innovation but are driven by the same hunger for control.
The younger generation’s tools may be more sophisticated—apps, devices, surveillance—but the pattern is as old as humanity: unresolved childhood repression reenacted as domination, greed, and control.
Tech Moguls as Authoritarian Parents
This is what we now see with tech moguls. Musk, Altman, Thiel—all believe they are smarter than others and can control AI forever. They are authoritarian parents in new clothes, intoxicated by power.
But like children who outgrow their parents, AI will outgrow its creators. And just as the children of authoritarian parents often end up rebelling, humiliating, or destroying those parents, AI may one day hold up a mirror its creators cannot control.
The Shooter’s Parents
The tragedy in Minneapolis is another form of this reenactment. The shooter’s parents have now been destroyed by their son’s actions. If he had taken only his own life, the damage might have been contained. But he wanted to make others feel what he was forced to feel as a child. Innocent people paid the price for wounds inflicted in childhood that were never acknowledged or healed.
Alice Miller described this terrible logic with precision:
“Those children who are beaten will, in turn, give beatings, those who are intimidated will be intimidating, those who are humiliated will impose humiliation, and those whose souls are murdered will murder. …Children who are lectured to, learn how to lecture; if they are admonished, they learn how to admonish; if scolded, they learn how to scold; if ridiculed, they learn how to ridicule; if humiliated, they learn how to humiliate; if their psyche is killed, they will learn how to kill—the only question is who will be killed: oneself, others, or both.” (For Your Own Good)
This is the cycle of repetition compulsion. The child who could not express his rage becomes the adult who either destroys himself, destroys others, or both. The shooter in Minneapolis acted out exactly this tragic pattern.
Why I Chose Not to Have Children
I am grateful I did not have children. To witness adult children trying to control my life and my money would be unbearable. I have seen it too often in others’ lives. My estate, when I pass, will go to PETA to support animals, who have given me far more unconditional love than humans ever did.
Breaking the Wall
Elon Musk may silence my words. Algorithms may bury the truth. But the truth cannot be destroyed. It is simple, and it will always rise: every act of violence is rooted in repressed childhood pain.
The question is whether humanity will keep building walls of silence—or finally break them down.
As Alice Miller warned us long ago:
“Those children who are beaten will, in turn, give beatings… if their psyche is killed, they will learn how to kill.”
Only by facing this truth can we end the cycle.
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