People are Driven by the Repressed Emotions

People are driven by the repressed emotions of the child they once were to sooner or later, in one form or another, to unconsciously and compulsively reenact their painful childhood dramas, and this is why they are not able to live the teaching of any religion and end up being a bunch of hypocrites... if children are born into love and experience love as little children, they will grow up into compassionate loving adults. Love cannot be taught and this is why all religions are fraud. Anyone preaching and teaching love are nothing but con artists and charlatans cashing in on people's emotional blindness.

Those of us that had the courage to face and feel the painful truth that we were born into families incapable of loving us, and learned to love ourselves instead by walking away from everyone that believes and telling us lies --poison us with lies -- to confuse us -- then we can become authentic loving adults incapable of hurting ourselves and any other living being.

"Genuine feelings cannot be produced, nor can they be eradicated. We can only repress them, delude ourselves, and deceive our bodies. The body sticks to the facts and never lies. ...If the repression stays unresolved, the parents’ childhood tragedy is unconsciously continued on in their children” - Alice Miller

“Several mechanisms can be recognized in the defense against early feelings of abandonment. In addition to simple denial, we usually find the exhausting struggle to fulfill the old, repressed, and by now often perverted needs with the help of symbols (cults, sexual perversions, groups of all kinds, alcohol, or drugs). Intellectualization is very commonly encountered as well, since it is a defense mechanism of great power.” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The search for the True Self) Page 11

Wild Times

 Dear Sylvie,

Well, I am still hanging in there... distracted by daily obligations, i
load onto my shoulders.

I am wondering how you are doing in this world, were the consequences of
the unseen truth hits our lives in so massive ways.

Any system, medical or social, or political is only as good, helpful
and human, as the people running this system. and we know, how emotional
rotten most of us are.

Corona didn't bother my life much, as I had to go to work as usual, and
stress there is the same as ever.

And as sad as it sounds, it is the same with my personal life. I struggle
with the same issues all the time.

How did corona impact your life, income, job, etc? are you ok so far?

and then the explosive political situation in the USA?

Hopefully, you are doing as well as possible. I am glad to be sure, that
you are really able to take care of yourself. although it is sad, to
have to live under so worrying conditions...

I know, that I am one of your readers, who "understood" AM
intellectually, unable to really incorporate the truth (so far)

today on Sunday I am in a mood of having some quiet time, still sitting
in my bed, although it is afternoon ;)

I came across the documentary about the guy  and the film "into the wild"

I don't know, if you know this story about Chris Mac Candless, who did a
big trip throughout America after high school, heading for Alaska,
finally reached the wilderness and in the end, cruelly starving there. I
saw this film at the cinema years ago.

I have this urge to be alone in nature very much, too, and I wished so
much to spend time for my own in a lonesome hut in Sweden or any quiet
natural place, at least for some month. but I never made this "dream"
coming true. I didn't know anything about this guy before and the film
traumatized me in a way when I came across his desperate life-ending. I
felt so lost about this...

so, as I wrote above, on youtube the documentary popped up, and in the
comments there was this link to the sister of this guy, who - at least
tries to look at the truth. that her brother had his reasons to run away
from home and bring himself in  life-threatening situations... their
father head beat them up very hard and the children live in constant
fear and there was no protection by their mother, everything under the
coat of a Christian family.

well, finally, I guess the sister is still somehow believing in god, and
is maybe glorifying her brother to a certain amount? (i am not the one
to judge her, just wondering) but anyway I found it amazing, that she
dared to raise up the fact, that there was very much cruelty and lies
about the family, the children were told...

wondering if you want to take a glimpse, in fact, this fits your life...

http://www.carinemccandless.com/video/

I am wondering. how many nature seekers try to run away from a
destructive emotional condition in childhood...

well, Sylvie, this is my mail for today. not so uplifting. but at least
connecting...

I send you best wishes from a very rainy day in Bavaria.

We hadn't had a real summer yet. some sunny days with an ice-cold wind, but
anyway too less rain. drought longs for some years now, compared to the
long-term amount of rainfall/ snow over the last decades. well, of course,
no comparison with the conditions you have in Arizona. but for our
temperate zone, it is unnormal.  so rain is good for nature. but we
humans aren't, causing too much mess all around. there might be a next
ice age to clear this place...

take care as well as you can.

greetings from

J

Hi J,

Thank you for writing. 

I agree with everything you wrote! You are so right any system is as good as the people running them. Everyone has been a small child and we all have been repressed as a child to a degree and this is why we can't trust the system or anyone! We are alone in this world like it or not!

Thank you so much for the pictures I really enjoyed seeing them, especially the kittie! 

Sorry, I haven't written in a long time, but I just don't feel like writing much these days. 

Yes, the world around me seems to be going crazier and crazier, but thank goodness in my little corner I'm doing well. 

Corona didn't bother my life so far, knock on wood! I too worked as usual! My finances are finally in the green almost all recovered from the blowback of the sociopaths at my job of nine and a half years. 

Hopefully, in a few years, I will be ready financially to produce my next book Reenactment.

I hope you are safe and taking good care of yourself.

Greetings from the desert in Arizona,

Sylvie

Afghanistan

America went to Afghanistan, selling the illusion of freedom, but after 20 years, when maintaining the illusion of freedom got too costly, America decided to cut its losses – and abandoned Afghanistan.

America went to Afghanistan to remove the ruthless regime of the Taliban, and now the Taliban has grown into a bigger monster and will be a more ruthless regime.

So what Americans accomplished in 20 years was to replace the Taliban regime with a more ruthless Taliban regime, and now the whole world will be less safe and worse off.

I’m very sad for all the innocent beings living there that will have to pay the high price for America’s illusion of freedom.

When we mistake an illusion for the real thing, when it bursts, it can destroy us. 

If I had mistaken the illusion of love given to me at my job of nine and a half years for real love, I would not have survived when their illusion of love ended overnight after I published my book A Dance to Freedom, sharing my life experiences and psychological discoveries. 

The whole country of Afghanistan is going through a similar experience I went through at my job of nine and a half years! 

The people in Afghanistan who didn’t buy into the illusion of freedom might survive, but those who bought into the illusion of freedom sold by the Americans might not survive now.

Just like I wrote in my book on page 123, “I believe that most illusions are dangerous and will destroy us eventually. We can have fun with some illusions for a while if we recognize them for what they are, but we get deeply hurt when we mistake an illusion for the real thing.”

 

Authoritarianism in Training: Donald Trump and the Childhood Roots of Anger

 "The Editors: Can you explain the relationship between physical discipline in childhood and support for punitive political initiatives in adulthood?

The Authors: In our research, we have found that the higher the frequency of spanking a person received in childhood, sometimes referred to as “sub-clinical trauma,” the greater the authoritarianism in adulthood, and the greater their support for punitive public policies like the death penalty and the use of military force. We call this “affect displacement theory,” whereby emotion from one source, in this case, childhood, can be carried into adulthood and displaced onto adult political attitudes.

It is important to note that experiencing childhood abuse is not solely ‘yes’ or ‘no’: There are gradations of abuse. Was physical punishment used a lot or a little? It is also important to note that voting is a blunt instrument, reflecting a decision-making process that integrates multiple factors. And there are, of course, multiple influences on public opinion, including a person’s education and gender and economic position, their parents’ attitudes, their friends’ attitudes, and the mass media. Many who voted for Trump did so, we believe, because they anticipated financial benefits and were willing to ignore his racism and sexism. Racism and sexism are often core elements of a person’s authoritarianism, as it puts other people below them.

On a related note, several studies have found authoritarianism to be associated with beliefs in rape myths and hostile attitudes toward women. It’s not surprising that Trump has tremendously negative attitudes toward women — the “pussy-grabbing” that he bragged about in the Access Hollywood tape is one good example of the link between authoritarianism and sexual aggression." Read more HERE

humans are destroying the planet

Because the more sharp people's intellect is the more they use it to escape from facing and feeling the painful truths in their  lives. We need people with courage to open their eyes to see and feel. 

It’s sad to witness everyday people using their sharp intellect to run from looking at the facts and see fundamental psychological mechanisms. 

It takes courage to see fundamental psychological mechanisms, intelligence alone is not enough -- it rather helps create elaborated  rationalizations, seductive lies and illusions.

Social Violence

 "That all social violence--whether by war, revolution or economic exploitation--is ultimately a consequence of child abuse should not surprise us. The propensity to reinflict childhood trauma upon others as an adult in socially-approved violence is actually far more able to explain and predict the actual outbreak of wars than the usual economic motivations, and we are likely to continue to undergo our periodic sacrificial rituals of war if the infliction of childhood trauma continues. The human race is now quite able technologically to satisfy its needs if we can live together without violence toward each other. But unless we employ our social resources toward consciously assisting the evolution of child-rearing, we will be doomed to the periodic destruction of our resources, both material and human. To Selma Freiberg's dicta that "Trauma demands repetition" I would only add "repetition through social action." We cannot be content to only continue to do endless repair work on damaged adults, with our therapies and jails and political movements. Our task now must, in addition, be to create an entirely new profession of "child helpers" whose can reach out to every new child born on earth and help its parents give it love and independence." -- Lloyd deMause www.psychohistory.com

above excerpt from The History of Child Abuse

by Lloyd deMause www.primal-page.com/ph-abuse.htm

Psychohistory Articles Menu www.primal-page.com/psyhis.htm#menu

The Primal Psychotherapy Page www.primal-page.com

“Banished Knowledge: Facing Childhood Injuries” by Alice Miller, she says: “As a rule, children who were once injured will later injure their own children,  maintaining that their behavior does no harm because their own loving parents did the same.

Historians and psychologists will long continue to ponder the reasons for this outlandish behavior because in their deliberations they overlook the only correct explanation. But in the long run, this explanation cannot be avoided, and it becomes obvious the moment the question is asked: What eventually happens to the person who was mutilated as a child? When a small child is tortured by ignorant adults, won't he have to take his revenge later in life? He is bound to avenge himself unless his subsequent life allows the old wounds to heal in love, which is seldom the case. As a rule, children who were once injured will later injure their own children, maintaining that their behavior does no harm because their own loving parents did the same. Besides, in the case of circumcision it is a religious demand, and to many people, it is still unthinkable that religion could demand cruelty. But what if the unthinkable is true? Are the children and children's children to be sacrificed because of the ignorance of the priests? It took three thousand years for the church to accept Galileo's proofs and admit its error. Today it is not a matter of theoretical astronomical proofs but of the practical consequences deriving from an insight that could save humanity from self-destruction, because it has already been proven that all destructive behavior has its roots in the repressed traumas of childhood. As soon as legislators become serious about the rights of the child to protection and respect as proclaimed by UNESCO, the fact will have to be acknowledged that ritual circumcisions

1.offer no advantage and are a mutilation;

2.prevent the relaxation experience and lead to over-stimulation with potentially destructive and self-destructive effects;

3.inflict a trauma on the child leading to an injury of his whole being, with the consequences of these injuries affecting not only the individual and his descendants but other human beings as well.”

Also in her book “Breaking Down the Wall of Silence: The Liberating Experience of Facing Painful Truth” Alice Miller speaks of the custom in some countries of female circumcision that also shows the same mechanisms perpetuating male circumcision: “Their consciousness, however, has not registered the realities of their situation. By repressing not only the pain but also their anger and desire for revenge, they have managed to banish consciousness, even idealizing the custom. Today, as a result of their repression, they can justify the procedure as harmless and necessary. They cannot recall their repressed anger and have never grieved about what happened to them. Consequently, they inflict the same ordeal on their children without wishing to acknowledge what they're doing to them.”

Also words below from an interview Alice Miller gave in November 1992 are very poignant. 

"I was told that there are cultures in which children are not mistreated and in which, significantly, "no wars are fought. "

"But I don't know them well. If you hear of such a society, I would be indebted to you for more detailed information about it."

"Philip Greven has shown how widespread sadistic and destructive methods of child-rearing still are, particularly those concealed under the mantle of religiosity. This is not only true of Christian child-rearing. 100 million Islamic women living today have had their genitals mutilated as children. Millions of Jewish or Arab children are, for the sake of dogma, subjected to circumcision, as infants or at an advanced age. Such cruelty is only possible with the total denial of the child's sensibility."

" In fact, I know of no religion that forbids and condemns the mistreatment of children as a matter of practice. Respect, understanding, and love are universally preached to parents, no matter how they behave. Children, on the other hand, according to Luther, for instance, should only be loved in so far as they are obedient and god-fearing : that is, as long as they deny themselves. Parents have a right to the unconditional love and respect of their children."

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2012/08/question-about-circumcision.html

How a Person's Character is Developed

 "We do not arrive in this world as a clean slate. Every new baby comes with a history of its own, the history of the nine months between conception and birth. In addition, children have the genetic blueprint they inherit from their parents. These factors may help determine what kind of a temperament a child will have, what inclinations, gifts, and predispositions.

But character depends crucially upon whether a person is given love, protection, tenderness, and understanding or exposed to rejection, coldness, indifference, and cruelty in the early formative years. The stimulus indispensable for developing the capacity for empathy, say, is the experience of loving care. In the absence of such care, when a child is forced to grow up neglected, emotionally starved, and subjected to physical abuse, he or she will forfeit this innate capacity. While I ascribe immense significance to the experiences of infants in the first days, weeks, and months of their lives to explain their later behavior, I do not wish to assert that later influences are completely ineffectual. Rather, if a traumatized or neglected child can later come to know what I call an "enlightened" or "knowing witness," he or she can deal positively with the effects of that childhood trauma.

We know today that the brain we are born with is not the finished product it was once thought to be. The structuring of the brain depends very much on the experiences of the first hours, days, and weeks of a person's life. In the last few years, scientific studies led by neurologist and child psychiatrist Dr. Bruce D. Perry (www.childtrauma.org/) have further established that traumatized and neglected children display severe lesions affecting up to 30 percent of those areas of the brain that control our emotions. Severe traumas inflicted on infants lead to an increase in the release of stress hormones that destroy the existing, newly formed neurons and their interconnections." -- Alice Miller