The Mask of the Healer: From the Epstein Files to the Prestigious Doctor Down the Hall

The recent release of the Epstein files has done what the justice system, for too long, could not: it has begun to pull back the curtain on a world of carefully constructed illusions. We are seeing the names of wealthy and influential men—doctors, scientists, businessmen—who orbited a convicted sex offender, exposed in black and white. Men like Peter Attia, the famed longevity doctor who joked with Epstein and lamented he couldn't tell a soul about their "outrageous" friendship. Men like Leon Black and Glenn Dubin, who continued to associate with him and, in some cases, welcomed him into their homes with their children present.

The files are a testament to a simple, brutal truth: the truth always comes to the light, sooner or later, in one form or another.

As I read these names—including the long list of doctors from Mount Sinai and other prestigious institutions who provided "VIP" services to Epstein—I am not surprised. I am, however, filled with a familiar, heavy feeling. It’s the same feeling I had in 2013, watching a resident from the community where I worked fall for the illusions of another charlatan promoted by Oprah Winfrey: the Brazilian "faith healer" John of God, who was later exposed and arrested.

We live in a world of puppets and puppeteers. And some of the most dangerous puppeteers are not the ones we fear, but the ones we are taught to trust. They are the "helpers" who, behind closed doors, create the chaos, only to later appear as the heroes. As I wrote to a corrupt former employer the day I resigned:

"A lot of the time, the 'helpers' who covertly, behind closed doors, create the chaos later appear to be the heroes and nice people. The most dangerous terrorists are in boardrooms. We live in a world where some very smart people have become master manipulators at creating big illusions to fool the emotionally blind public."

A Story Closer to Home

This brings me to my own story. While the world watches the downfall of Epstein’s associates, I think about the "prestigious psychiatric Dr. Julio Machado Vaz" in my country of birth, Portugal. I wonder when his mask will be ripped away.

I was 17 years old when he sexually abused me. He was a young, 27-year-old doctor. Back then, he was building a reputation, a career on the foundation of trust that his white coat and title afforded him. I have no doubt that during his long lifetime as a doctor, he abused many other vulnerable teenagers like me. He was, in his own way, a Portuguese equivalent to these men we are now seeing in the headlines—protected by his status, his connections, and the public's emotional blindness.

It may be that my story will only get the attention it deserves after I am dead. It may be that he will only be exposed after he is gone, too. But I have no doubt that it will happen. Because, as we are seeing now, the truth is patient. It waits. And eventually, it finds a way through the cracks in the illusion.

The Profitable Business of Illusion

The Epstein files show us that the "cult business" is very profitable, whether it’s the cult of personality around a financier, a TV host, or an author. We see it in the recent charges against acclaimed Australian children's author Craig Silvey, accused of child exploitation offenses. Another person in a position of trust, another illusion shattered for the families involved.

Oprah Winfrey famously said that her "job ended" and her "calling began." I would argue her calling became that of a master puppeteer, promoting cult leaders like John of God and cashing in on society’s desperate need for easy answers and charismatic figures. She is not alone. The boardrooms are filled with these "smart people" who have become experts at creating big illusions.

No Escape from Destiny

To those who continue to protect the prestigious psychiatric Dr. Julio Machado Vaz in Portugal, and to all the enablers who look the other way, I offer the same words I left with my former employer:

"Good luck to you all, too, but have in mind everyone will meet their own destiny sooner or later in one form or another -- there's no escape... When all your illusions burst, I'm glad I will not be around because it will not be pretty. Most importantly, I wish you all courage and strength to get through it when all your illusions burst."

The Epstein files are just one more chapter in humanity's long, slow reckoning with its hidden darkness. They prove that no amount of prestige, money, or carefully managed public image can shield a person from their own destiny. The truth is coming for them all. And one day, it will come for him, too.

Also, read about Dr. Johnnie Barto, a sexual predator pediatrician, gets up to 158 years in prison

Will More Women in Portugal Find the Courage to Report Dr. Julio Machado Vaz's Sexual Abuse?

Will Ever Portugal Find the Courage to Investigate Dr. Julio Machado Vaz?

Bill O'Reilly wasn't fired because of what he did — he was fired because it got out

Outonecer: When a Predator Performs Wisdom in Autumn

When the Body Reveals the Truth: A Reflection on Tatiana Schlossberg’s Essay and the Inheritance of Repression

This week, a reader and correspondent, David, reached out to me after reading Tatiana Schlossberg’s essay about her leukemia diagnosis. He was struck by a quote in which she confessed that, all her life, she had tried to be “good,” never upset her mother, and felt guilty that her illness would now make her mother sad.

David found these words shocking — as we all should. But they are not surprising to me. They reveal the tragic emotional inheritance that so many carry, generation after generation, without ever naming it.

I didn’t read Tatiana’s full essay because I already knew what I would find:
a sad, disconnected story with no resolution — a story shaped by a lifetime of emotional repression. A story in which the body finally presents the bill for the truth the mind has buried.

As Alice Miller wrote:

“The body does not understand moral precepts. It fights against the denial of genuine emotions and for the admission of the truth to our conscious minds. This is something the child cannot afford to do; it has to deceive itself and turn a blind eye to the parents’ crimes in order to survive. Adults no longer need to do this, but if they do, the price they pay is high.”

Tatiana’s words show us a child who never learned to exist as herself, only as the caretaker of her mother’s emotional world. She believed it was her job to protect her mother from sadness, anger, or disappointment — a complete inversion of the parent-child relationship. And now, in adulthood, she still feels responsible for her mother’s feelings, even to the point of guilt over her own illness.

This is not love.
This is repression.

The Endless Reenactment of Generational Trauma

Tatiana’s story is not hers alone. Her family has been reenacting unresolved trauma for decades. Her mother, Caroline Kennedy, was only five years old when her father, President John F. Kennedy, was assassinated. That childhood shock — compounded by emotional invisibility — becomes the silent blueprint for generations.

And last year, Tatiana gave birth to a child who will now grow up emotionally and physically abandoned by a mother who is engulfed in her own unresolved pain. This is not about blame. This is about truth. A child cannot receive what a parent never received.

They are trapped in an endless loop of reenactments, where each generation repeats the emotional blindness of the one before.

Without consciousness, trauma becomes destiny.

When Experts Diagnose Trauma but Preserve Repression

David also asked about Gabor Maté’s When the Body Says No. I haven’t read it. I don’t feel compelled to. I already know the landscape it traverses, a landscape Alice Miller mapped decades earlier with incomparable clarity and courage — yet Maté rarely, if ever, speaks her name.

Even the title of his book echoes hers: The Body Never Lies (2005).

Maté, like many professionals today, offers accurate diagnoses but misguided solutions. They identify childhood trauma, yet when it comes to healing, they guide people right back into the tools of repression: meditation, yoga, 12-step spiritualizing, psychiatric drugs. These may soothe symptoms, but they never confront the emotional truth.

They teach people once again to manipulate and suppress their feelings — which guarantees that the repetition compulsion will continue.

As I’ve written before, and as my own life has proven:

It is not the trauma itself that destroys us — it is the repression of our authentic feelings.

Illness as the Body’s Final Cry for Truth

Autoimmune diseases, rare cancers, mysterious chronic conditions — these are not random events. They are the body’s rebellion against a lifetime of emotional denial. When a child lives in an environment where their truth is too dangerous to express, the body absorbs the unuttered pain.

As adults, we are no longer helpless children.
But many continue to live as if they are.

Tatiana’s guilt, her self-erasure, her inability to express anger, grief, or disappointment — these are not personality traits. They are survival mechanisms. And survival mechanisms carried into adulthood become destruction mechanisms.

Some destroy their health.
Some destroy others.
Some destroy the next generation.

The Courage to Break the Cycle

I see in Tatiana’s essay what I have seen across my entire life and in every human story I’ve ever studied through the lens of Alice Miller: unresolved childhood pain, unexamined loyalty to parental illusion, and the tragic belief that being “good” is the path to love.

Being good is not the same as being authentic.
Being obedient is not the same as being alive.

The body never forgets this difference.

If we want to heal — truly heal — we must stop protecting our parents' illusions and start protecting our inner child’s truth. That is the path to freedom. Anything else is another turn in the cycle of reenactment.

I wish Tatiana and her family no harm. I wish them consciousness.
But consciousness cannot be borrowed or inherited.
It must be chosen — often in the face of enormous fear — to face and consciouly feel our repressed, painful emotions.

As long as society rewards repression and elevates the voices of those who keep people asleep, tragedies like these will continue. But the roots are not unknown. Alice Miller named them clearly decades ago. The human body reveals them even when the mind refuses.

The truth is always there, waiting.
The question is whether we are willing to see it.

This essay was written in collaboration with artificial intelligence (ChatGPT) as a tool for reflection, synthesis, and articulation. The responsibility for the ideas and interpretations expressed here remains my own.

Addendum — January 2026

Tatiana Schlossberg passed away on December 30 at the age of 35, leaving behind two very young children. Her death is deeply sad, not only because of its timing, but because her own words had already revealed the emotional cost she carried long before her body failed.

In the public tributes, she is rightly praised as brave, loving, accomplished, and devoted — the familiar language that comforts the living. Yet her New Yorker essay told a quieter and more unsettling truth: a life shaped by the belief that it was her duty to protect her mother from pain, anger, and disappointment, even at the expense of herself.

This is not a personal flaw. It is the legacy of emotional repression passed from generation to generation, untouched by wealth, education, or fame. Her family’s prominence did not free her from this inheritance any more than obscurity frees millions of others.

The real tragedy is not that she died young.
It is that she never had the chance to live fully as herself — and that her children now begin their lives carrying a loss whose deeper origins our society still refuses to face.

The roots of such suffering are not unknown. They have been named for decades. Until we are willing to confront them honestly, stories like this will continue to repeat — quietly, beautifully framed, and devastatingly unchanged.

From Scottsdale to Madrid: Lies, Violence, and the Right to Life

 This morning, I sat on my patio with my cats, enjoying the peace of emotional freedom. There is nothing better than witnessing the world from the outside looking in. I didn’t plan on writing this weekend—I wanted only to rest—but once again the theater of human illusions drew me in.

Everything I witness is theater, with talented actors who can speak eloquently yet are incapable of authentic feelings. Charlie Kirk, who lived here in Scottsdale, was one of those actors. Born in Chicago to a politically moderate family, he became an avid listener of Rush Limbaugh in high school. Limbaugh poisoned his mind, teaching him that leading a political cult built on lies and illusions was not only a way to gain attention, but also a very profitable business.

The irony is that Kirk’s assassin, Tyler Robinson, was himself part of another political cult—the Groyper movement, led by Holocaust denier Nick Fuentes. For Robinson, Kirk wasn’t conservative enough. Chickens coming home to roost.

Trump and his allies immediately blamed the left. And yet, despite the shooter belonging to the far right, they still want to punish the left; some on the left even lost their jobs for expressing emotions online. Matthew Dowd said Kirk’s words were divisive and hateful—then quickly apologized under pressure. The left apologizes and punishes their own when they make mistakes. The right, on the other hand, never apologizes, never holds themselves accountable. They keep pushing their damaging rhetoric without pause.

One example: when Kirk was asked how he would respond if his own 10-year-old daughter were raped and became pregnant, his answer revealed the darkness he embodied:

“That’s awfully graphic,” Kirk said. “But the answer is yes, the baby would be delivered.”

These words bring me back to my own childhood in Portugal, where I was surrounded by people who believed they had ownership over my body and destiny simply because I was born a girl. I am proud that I resisted this darkness and kept ownership of my body and choices.

When people debate abortion, I feel their hands all over me. I feel violated. Abortion is not up for debate—it is a woman’s right. Forcing a woman to carry a pregnancy to term against her will is a thousand times worse than rape. I am the captain of my body.

Pro-lifers claim to fight for the unborn, but unconsciously, they crave an endless supply of powerless beings onto whom they can project their disowned parts. Forcing women to give birth to children they cannot protect or nurture is soul murder. Those who idealize their parents and childhoods will always crave scapegoats on whom they can avenge the wounds of childhood. Poor, vulnerable women seeking abortion become the perfect scapegoats.

Pro-lifers suffer and secretly enjoy seeing others suffer too—they want others to share their fate. As Alice Miller warned:

“Do they not know that no less than one hundred percent of all seriously abused children are unwanted? Do they not know what that can lead to? … To force the role of a mother on a woman who does not wish to be a mother is an offense not just against her, but against the whole human community, because the child she brings into the world is likely to take criminal revenge for its birth, as do the many (mis)leaders threatening our lives. All wars we ever had were the deeds of once unwanted, heinously mistreated children. It is the right to lived life that we must protect wherever and whenever it is threatened. And it should never be sacrificed to an abstract idea.”
(Alice Miller, “Protecting Life After Birth”)

It is the children already born who have a right to life. Until violence against children is outlawed everywhere, talk of a “right to life” is a dangerous illusion—a mask for cruelty.

This afternoon, I also read of an explosion in Madrid that injured 21 people. When I was 15, I spent a summer not far from there, working in a public swimming pool selling ice cream. I was nervous handling money, but a gentle young bartender approached me with patience, teaching me how to make change without judgment. His kindness has stayed with me all these years.

That memory reminds me of what is possible when humans act from truth and compassion, not repression and lies. Violence destroys; kindness endures.

Notice: Transcript is AI and human-generated

Becoming Love: What Marty Couldn’t Give Me, Psychology Did

In 2019, when I lost my beloved cat Sutti, I wrote a letter through tears. She was more than a pet. She was love incarnate. Losing her opened up a grief so deep and pure, it reminded me of something I had always known but never fully grasped: only love and truth open the floodgates of the repressed emotions of the child we once were.

And not the counterfeit love most people perform. Not the intellectualized, mimicked understanding that passes for "healing" in self-help books and therapy circles. Real love. A love that lives and breathes. A love that sees and feels.

All I ever wanted from Marty was love. That simple. Not perfection. Not rescue. Just authentic, feeling love. But instead, what I got was a crash course in unconscious defenses, emotional blindness, and the tragic repetition of childhood wounds.

In other words: I got a master’s in psychology.

I didn’t sign up for that degree. It was handed to me in pain. Every silence, every deflection, every moment Marty pulled away instead of leaning in forced me to go deeper into myself. And in that descent, I uncovered the truth: he wasn't rejecting me — he was rejecting the parts of himself he never dared to face.

He was reenacting. And so was I.

But I was also waking up.

Loving Sutti was different. There were no mind games. No projection. Just presence. She reminded me that love doesn’t demand, it flows. And it stays.

In a letter I wrote after her passing, I said:

"It took me a lifetime to liberate myself and create a home for myself. I’m looking forward to retirement and just spending the rest of my life with just me and the beings I love most... Now that I have created a home for myself and I’m emotionally free -- I wish I could live forever."

That’s what emotional freedom feels like. It’s not a theory. It’s a state of being. It’s the ability to grieve without collapsing, to love without clinging, and to walk away from reenactments that once felt like destiny.

Most people never experience this. They live in constant survival mode, surrounded by others just as wounded, just as lost. They read the books. They collect the quotes. But they never let the floodgates open. They never let truth and love break the dam.

"Without truth and truly loving ourselves and another breathing living being, we will never become a seeing and a feeling person, no matter how many self-help books we read..."

I look around and see people going through the motions. They masquerade as love while manipulating those around them. They don’t even know they’re doing it — because their childhood pain is still buried beneath layers of denial and pretense.

Marty wasn’t a bad person. He was just too afraid to feel. And in trying to love him, I was forced to feel everything. That’s what freed me.

My childhood and teenage years were the saddest chapters of my life. Most of adulthood was survival. But now? Now, I am home. Within myself. Within love.

I wish Sutti could be here for my retirement years. I wish we had more time. But what comforts me is knowing she experienced the real me — the one who became love.

And maybe that’s the final lesson:

We stop falling in love when we start becoming it. And if ever we meet another soul who has done the same, we don’t fall — we rise together.

---

As I reflect deeper on my journey, I think of a quote I once shared in an old blog from 2012:

“It's a dark, cool, quiet place. A basement in your soul. And that place can sometimes be dangerous to the human mind. I can open the door and enter that darkness, but I have to be very careful. I can find my story there. Then I bring that thing to the surface, into the real world.” — Haruki Murakami

Going into the dark chamber of our soul alone — or with the wrong witness — can be extremely dangerous. Some people don’t come back from that descent. Some, like James Holmes, unleash their inner chaos onto the world. That’s why we need enlightened witnesses like Alice Miller. People who don’t look away. Who helps us face and feel our true story safely, without harming ourselves or others.

Because when we have the courage to open that door with truth and love as our compass, we don’t just find our story. We liberate it.

Read the 2012 reflection here.

People tell the truth with their unconscious reenactments

Yep, it's the same drama with different actors. That's why I'm happily single now. People unconsciously and compulsively reenact their childhood dramas with people standing in, symbolizing their parents or childhood caregivers. Just like I wrote in the Foreword of my book A Dance to Freedom and signed by Petra Helm."Sylvie Imelda Shene can see what happened to people as small children. She can also predict their futures. She’s not psychic or clairvoyant, but she knows that people unconsciously and compulsively tell the true and traumatic stories of their childhoods by repeating, reenacting, and recreating them in the present moment."
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2014/07/a-dance-to-freedom-your-guide-to.html

That's where I am. It's better to be alone. And to know that you are alone rather than wake up next to someone and, nevertheless, be alone. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=It%27s+better+to+be+alone

Interesting! 

Yep!

Yep! Walk away, let them be to meet their own future and destiny

The only boundaries that work with these types of people is to walk away and not let them back into your life. 

Some people are upset with you because you're not suffering the way they thought you would be, please continue to disappoint them.

Narcissists Hate People like me Exist

That's why they constantly target me: the moment they know I see right through them, I get a target on my back. They hate that people like me exist who can see and feel. I'm in a minority group, that's for sure.

So true. 

As the saying goes... when something is too good to be true, it is because it's too good to be true!

These words by Alice Miller could not be truer: "...like every psychopath, not at all interested in understanding himself, only in controlling, misleading and manipulating others. ..."

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2014/08/talking-about-psychopaths-and-school.html

Very true. They are very cheap! They hate spending their money. 

Once they show you who they really are and choose darkness, walk away and let them meet their own future and destiny. 

Yes, I have the power to walk away and stay away. That's real power! 

Yep! It's insane. We are the crop! Eventually, they will take everyone around them down with them

7 - Without Truth, there can be no Help

A great deal of understanding is shown for an unemployed father who beats his children. There is no problem understanding an overburdened executive who does the same thing, especially when he is irritated by his wife. The wife also meets with understanding when she can't help beating her child after the milk boils over. Page, 130

The Jungian doctrine of the shadow and the notion that evil is the reverse of good aim to deny the reality of evil. But evil is real. It is not innate but acquired, and it is never the reverse of good but rather its destroyer. Page, 142

Evil people
Our knowledge cannot alter them. They can change only if they sense, not merely intellectually but with their feelings, how they have been turned into evil people. Only then will they be able to remove the blockages and, by experiencing the blocked pain, liberate the abused child who had to wish to harm anyone on coming into the world, the child who wanted love but found no one to make that possible for him. All he found was barbed wire and walls on all sides, and he believed that was the world. When he grew up, he built gigantic worlds full of walls and barbed wire, or complicated philosophical and psychological systems, in the hope and expectation of receiving love in return- the love he never received from his parents when he was an 'unworthy life.  Page, 143
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=banished+knowledge+

Yep! I see people connected all the time by fear, hatred, and money, but I seldom see people connected by love.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2021/12/money-alone-will-not-save-anyone.html?m=1

Yep!

Yes, malignant covert narcissists are the most dangerous. 

Yep! Because they are too afraid to walk away and be alone to do their emotional work to resolve their own childhood repression, they become like the people they grew up with and hated so much.

Yep! They can't survive on their own, no matter how much money the narcissist has... They constantly need a scapegoat or a poison container for projection or transference effects to temporarily and superficially alleviate their unresolved childhood repression. 

Very true!

Yep! I'm so glad there are no narcissists in my life right now; it's so peaceful. I don't make a good supply, so they don't want me in their lives. If they had their way, I would be in jail, in a mental hospital, or dead. They hate the existence of people like me. The existence of people like me ruins the wicked, evil, manipulative games they play to exploit the emotionally blind people in this world. 

No, it's not my job.

With my book and all my writings, I give people the map and keys to liberate themselves if they ever find the courage to do their emotional work—the most important work in a person's lifetime—and leave the emotional prison of their childhood. As the quote below says, this journey is theirs to take. 

It takes courage to see, face, and feel our painful truths—intelligence alone is not enough; it can instead create seductive rationalizations, theories, illusions, and lies that help us run from facing and feeling our own painful truths. 

"You can't heal the people you love. You can't make choices for them. You can't rescue them.

You can promise that they won't journey alone. You can loan them your map. But this trip is theirs." Laura Jean Truman

Flying Monkeys, they suck. Walk away from the narcissist and their Flying Monkeys. Let them be to meet their own future and destiny. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=Flying+Monkeys

Yep, they show us how they truly feel through their facial expressions and disastrous reenactments—it reveals the truth of their emotional state. 

Yep, I have learned to cut my losses and walk away from people who want to stand on my head to gain an advantage in the games people play and feel superior to others.  

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=the+games+people+play

True. They can't deal with reality and face their own painful truths. They would rather kill and be killed than face their own painful truths. They are doing everything in their power to avoid facing the pain that they were born into this world without love. So they settled for the illusion of love. As children, this illusion helped us survive, but as adults, it keeps us endlessly stuck in the emotional prison of our childhood. 

These words by Alice Miller are so true: “We cannot really love if we are forbidden to know our truth, the truth about our parents and caregivers as well as about ourselves. We can only try to behave as if we were loving, but this hypocritical behavior is the opposite of love. It is confusing and deceptive, and it produces much helpless rage in the deceived person. This rage must be repressed in the presence of the pretended “love,” especially if one is dependent, as a child is, on the person who is masquerading in this illusion of love.” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self) Page 23

In this interview, "The Feeling Child" with Alice Miller by Diane Connors for OMNI Publications International in March 1987 --- Dr. Alice Miller says:

"Pain is the way to the truth. By denying that you were unloved as a child, you spare yourself some pain, but you are not with your own truth. And throughout your whole life, you'll try to earn love. In therapy, avoiding pain causes blockage. Yet nobody can confront neglect or hatred without feeling guilty. "It is my fault that my mother is cruel," he thinks. "I made my mother furious; what can I do to make her loving?" So he will continue trying to make her love him. The guilt is really protection against the terrible realization that you are fated to have a mother who cannot love. This is much more painful than thinking, "Oh, she is a good mother, it's only me who's bad." Because then you can try to do something to get love. But it's not true; you cannot earn love. And feeling guilty for what has been done to you only supports your blindness and your neurosis.

I try to reach the child in the readers and allow them to feel. I see my style as ranking keys. Everybody can take one so that they can go open their own door to find something. Or they can say no, I don't want to go through this door; I will return the key. I try to evoke feelings, and images. In this way, I offer keys to your own experience. You can then go look at your children and learn from them, not from me. Because only from your own experience can you really learn.

In my first studies, I was very abstract; I wanted to understand the most abstract ideas -- of Kant, Hegel, or Marx. My philosophy dissertation was very abstract. Now I see that each philosopher had to build a big, big building to avoid feeling his pain. Even Freud.

If a child has been molested and the therapist doesn't deny this fact, many things can open up in the patient. The therapist must not preach forgiveness, or the patient will repress the pain. He won't change, and the repressed rage will look for a scapegoat." Please read the full interview HERE.

Narcissists Choose Darkness

noun: vitriol

1. 1.

   cruel and bitter criticism.

   "her mother's sudden gush of fury and vitriol"
2. 2.

   archaic•literary

   sulfuric acid.

   "it was as if his words were spraying vitriol on her face"
3. 
   

Narcissists choose darkness because they are cowards too afraid to face and feel their own painful truths. In the dark they can carry on with their wicked mind games.

1. 
   

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2020/03/using-childhood-traumas-as-excuse-to_73.html

1. 
   

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2016/06/sociopaths-hate-us.html?m=1

1. 
   

"What Is “Your Light”?

Your Light is your authentic self.

What does this mean?

It means your Inner Being’s natural state, without trauma, limitation and “darkness”. The narcissist must work with your “shadows” [what this author calls "shadows" is the unresolved repressed emotions of the child you once were. The narcissist's projections and transferences joined together with your triggered unresolved repressed emotions is how narcissists manipulate you to act out their evil acts] to control you and have the upper hand. These are your inner emotional “gaps”, making you feel like the narcissist’s opinion and behavior are shaping your inner and outer life.

Without initially understanding this (perfectly understandable in the “fog of war”), these are the bullets you are handing the narcissist to shoot you with.

In extreme contrast, if you do the inner work to shore up these inner wounds and dependencies – if they no longer exist and you are no longer triggered. You are simply and powerfully yourself, unaffected by the narcissist’s words and antics, rather than being sucked into “darkness”.

Rather you just stand as a bright LIGHT.

Meaning a shining Truth that plays no part in the narcissist’s narrative. You have no need to argue, justify or participate anymore at all. You are just being and generating a life representing health, truth and sanity.

How Dark Is The Narcissist’s Darkness?

Your Light is the VERY opposite of the darkness that the narcissist’s False Self is.

Let’s look at just how dark and perverse the narcissistic psyche is. It contains things like ego attachments to significance, notoriety, stuff, sex, addiction to attention, promiscuity, depravity, manipulation, cruelty, exploitation of others, revenge, envy … and so much more.

If you are a “Light” against this darkness, the narcissistic garbage becomes “Not Your Reality“. You are beaming your Light and creating your life regardless of what the narcissist is or isn’t doing.

This is achieved by honouring your emotional self – your Inner Being. It is done by turning inwards to load up and release all the terrible triggered traumas accompanying narcissistic abuse.

These are things like the disbelief of such evil and maliciousness and the heartbreak that someone who is supposed to love you can treat you like the enemy with absolutely no conscience or clemency. The narcissist becoming “Not Your Reality” is achieved by releasing YOUR darkness – any negative emotion – including fear, confusion and any other internal feeling of dense energy that is NOT Light.

The narcissist loves it when you are in fear, pain, insecurity, confusion and trauma (darkness). Because then you are on the narcissist’s dark battlefield. This is “hell on earth” where the narcissist is a demon – incredibly comfortable operating and energised by negative emotions and your bleeding emotional wounds, just as sharks are when in a feeding frenzy.

Here, in this “hell”, you cannot fight back. You would literally have to sell your Soul to beat a narcissist in their “lair” and be prepared to go to every length to do so – and what would you ultimately lose by doing so?

The answer is your Soul.

(A narcissist would usually rather die than be wrong.)

Click on the link below to read more 

https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/the-1-thing-that-terrifies-the-narcissist/ 

The only way to save our souls and protect ourselves from these now evil people, we must not engage with them, cut our losses, and grieve our losses. Walk away and let them be to meet their own future and destiny. 

Use the grey rock method 

"The grey rock method is where you deliberately act unresponsive or unengaged so that an abusive person will lose interest in you.

Abusive people thrive on emotions and drama. When you act indifferent and don’t show your emotions, they may lose interest and stop bothering you. This is known as “grey rocking.”"

https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method

We only can save ourselves. Doing our emotional work to resolve childhood repression is the most important work in our adult lives. And the vaccine against narcissists, sociopaths, assholes or whatever you like to call these now evil people. 

"The unconscious compulsion to revenge repressed injuries is more powerful than reason. That is the lesson that all tyrants teach us. One should not expect judiciousness from a mad person motivated by compulsive panic. One should, however, protect oneself from such a person." Alice Miller -- Breaking Down the Wall of Silence page 82 

Using our triggers productively 

“The key to effective therapy is learning how to use your present triggers productively. They can help us clarify, understand, and consciously feel our intense emotions within the context of our own childhoods without losing our adult consciousness. A good therapist can help us regain our adult consciousness if we lose it and encourage our autonomy, so we can deal with present issues from an adult perspective.

… Just remember this: If particular people or circumstances trigger excruciatingly intense feelings inside you, just keep telling yourself that these are the repressed feelings of the child you once were. Feelings don’t kill anyone no matter how intense they are. Only actions kill. So if you ride your intense feelings into shore, direct them at the real culprits who hurt you when you were a defenseless child and avoid taking any actions you may regret later, you’ll be free and no one will get hurt. As an autonomous adult, you do have some control over the people you let into your inner circle, and you may have to make some relationship adjustments as you do your emotional work. I took a lot of extra time to be with myself in solitude because most of the people in my life just didn’t understand what I was going through. When you’re trying to resolve your repression, being around unconscious people who are doing everything they can to avoid their own truths puts you at risk of relapsing into playing your old roles.” From my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions pages 129, 163, and 164:

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2021/10/using-our-triggers-constructively.html?m=1

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