Who is afraid of Alice Miller?

Scroll down for an AI-polished version of this blog—same heart, clearer words.

I found a film online titled Who is Afraid of Alice Miller? I would say the same people who are Afraid of Sylvie Shene. Because they know we have lanterns and we can shine the light on them and expose them for the fraud that they are -- so they want to do anything in their power to discredit us --  people that have not resolved their own childhood repression --  they are hiding behind pretty seductive theories and intellectual knowledge only -- and they are not real or authentic -- and now they have grown into full-blown malignant narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths, bad players, assholes, or what you like to call now these evil people. I have compassion for the little children they once were, but I have little compassion for the monstrous adults they have become. 

These people are trying to stand on Alice Miller’s head to make a name for themselves and make a buck.

In the introduction of the film Who is Afraid of Alice Miller, Martin Miller accuses his mother of telling him that he had become like his father! Well, he did -- that's what happens -- we become just like our childhood abusers -- when we don’t face our internalized childhood abusers and resolve our own childhood repression -- we become just like them... most people are shackled into the chains of repetitive compulsion. AND THIS IS WHY HISTORY ALWAYS KEEPS REPEATING ITSELF. 

The journalists interviewing these people are annoying, emphasizing their degrees and licenses as psychotherapists to give them credibility. 

Having a degree in psychology and a license to practice psychotherapy means nothing. What matters is to have the courage to resolve our own childhood repression, and you don’t get that in a university. Most people in our world lack courage and are a bunch of cowards, like the son of Alice Miller, who waited for his mother to die to try to stand on her head and make a name for himself. Just like a reviewer of his book wrote: 

"First of all, the fact that this writer was able to write a book using all her mother's techniques indicates very clearly that said techniques actually work.

I am really sorry to hear that this guy had such a difficult life with a traumatized mother who seemed to have lacked the ability to implement her theories with her own son. [Alice Miller could not have implemented her techniques with her own son -- because she developed her techniques later in life -- when her son was already an adult in his thirties. Once we reach adulthood, we are responsible for our own healing, and Alice Miller, with her books, gives us the enlightened information to guide us through our own healing.] That makes her a flawed and fallible human being, but that doesn't take away the merits of her brilliant writings.

Whatever this guy went through in his own childhood, I am really sorry to hear. But what he is choosing to do with his own pain is a coward and self-serving strategy to make a name for himself by trashing his mother, because he knows very well he doesn't even have 1% of the talent, the courage, the insight, the brilliance that Alice Miller had, both as a healer (since she didn’t like to be called a psychoanalyst) and as a writer." Read more in the link below:

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/08/these-are-most-likely-only-two.html?m=1

Most mental health professionals just memorize some good knowledge that they use to play mind games and manipulate their subjects.  Alice Miller found that psychoanalysis theory and practice actually hinder true liberation because it was just another form of what she called poisonous pedagogy. She was so convinced that psychoanalysis was dangerous that she resigned from the psychoanalytical associations she belonged to. 

"I have described the path to my new insights in Pictures of a Childhood (1986), The Untouched Key (1990), Banished Knowledge (1990), and Breaking Dawn the Wall of Silence (1991). In 1988, I officially broke away from psychoanalysis by resigning from the Swiss and the International psychoan­alytical associations. My first three books, originally pub­lished in Germany between 1979 and 1981, mark the beginning of this development, for it was only as I was writ­ing them that I began systematically to explore childhood, including my own. Thanks to my work on those books, to my spontaneous painting, and later to the exploration of my own childhood, I could see what, despite my critical attitude toward the drive theory, had remained concealed from me during the twenty years of my analytical practice. It was not easy to escape from the labyrinth of psychoanalysis. It took me fifteen years to accomplish this liberation process: from 1973, when spontaneous painting allowed me vaguely to sense the truth, until 1988, when I was finally able to artic­ulate it completely." Alice Miller

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2012/08/introduction-to-revised-edition-1995.html

Like I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions, pages 129, 131, 132, “…I really want to reinforce the idea that so-called therapists and gurus only substitute one dangerous illusion for another. As Alice Miller writes, “What can happen when a doctor doesn’t stop at self-deception in his flight from pain, but deceives his patients, even founding dogmatic institutions in which further ‘helpers’ are recruited to a faith advertised as scientific ‘truth,’ can be catastrophic.”64 

… Since the beginning of human history, priests, teachers, gurus, psychics, doctors, philosophers, and psychologists have all duped people into thinking they could provide real assistance, when it was never possible because the healers were also victims of their own childhoods. Alice Miller saw the promise of psychotherapy to help people understand why they behave like helpless victims as adults and also to help them take responsibility for their actions. But she was disillusioned when she realized that practitioners couldn’t treat patients effectively as long as they failed to deal with their own repression. 

… It is the major flaw in most human therapies that they are themselves grounded in the fear of the parents and the repressed emotions of traumatic experiences. It’s why therapy so often doesn’t work, and it frustrated Alice Miller and encouraged her to find a new way. “Sometimes for decades on end, clients and analysts remain bogged down in a maze of half-baked concepts,”68 she writes. Whether or not a therapist has been freed of his or her own repression is what will determine the success or failure of a given therapy. Only Alice Miller offers a complete and total solution for our problems because she gets to the root of the matter and frees us from the pain, fear, and anger that, if left untreated, can lead us into a state of depression.”

I have no doubt that Alice Miller's son, Martin Miller, was the trigger for all of Alice Miller's books. And if he had not been born, we would not have had Alice Miller's enlightened books to help us liberate ourselves from the emotional prison of our own childhoods. And I would probably be dead NOW or still living in an emotional prison.  He is just like a double-edged sword.  

Read more in the link below:

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/08/martin-miller-son-of-alice-miller-is.html?m=1

Here’s your polished and sharpened blog post, with tightened phrasing, heightened impact, and clearer thematic flow—while preserving your fiery truth-telling voice:

Who’s Afraid of Alice Miller? (And Why They Fear Sylvie Shene Too)

I watched Who is Afraid of Alice Miller?—a film that, like so much of the "mental health" industry, dances around the real issue: the repressed emotions of the wounded child. The answer to the title’s question? The same people who fear me.

Why? Because we carry lanterns. And light exposes frauds.

Those who haven’t resolved their own childhood repression hide behind pretty theories, intellectual jargon, and professional credentials. They’re not authentic. They’ve grown into full-blown narcissists, sociopaths, and emotional predators—malignant adults clinging to the very lies Alice Miller spent her life dismantling.

I have compassion for the abused children they once were. But I have none for the monsters they’ve become.

Martin Miller: A Case Study in Unhealed Repetition

The film’s introduction features Martin Miller accusing his mother of telling him he’d become like his father. She was right. That’s exactly what happens when we refuse to face our internalized abusers. Unresolved repression turns us into carbon copies of those who hurt us. This is why history repeats—why cycles of abuse persist.

The journalists fawn over Martin’s psychotherapy degrees, as if credentials magically confer wisdom. But a license means nothing. Courage means everything. Few have the guts to excavate their own pain—least of all those profiting from others’ suffering.

A reviewer of Martin’s book nailed it:

"The fact that he used Alice Miller’s techniques to write his own book proves her methods work. His trauma is real—but trashing his mother posthumously is cowardice. He knows he lacks 1% of her brilliance."

Alice couldn’t "fix" her adult son. Her insights came after his childhood. By then, the responsibility was his. Yet instead of doing his own emotional work, he chose to exploit her legacy. A perfect case of unhealed repetition.

Psychoanalysis: Poisonous Pedagogy in Disguise

Alice Miller saw through psychoanalysis early. It wasn’t liberation—it was another form of poisonous pedagogy, repackaging control as "therapy." She resigned from all psychoanalytic associations, recognizing the field’s fatal flaw: Most therapists are still prisoners of their own repression.

As I wrote in A Dance to Freedom:

"Therapists and gurus swap one illusion for another. Alice Miller realized practitioners couldn’t truly help patients until they faced their own buried pain. That’s why therapy often fails—it’s built on the same fear and denial it claims to treat."

For decades, clients and analysts wander mazes of half-baked concepts, never reaching the core: the unexpressed rage, grief, and terror of the child they abandoned.

Martin Miller: The Double-Edged Sword

Ironically, Martin was likely the catalyst for Alice’s work. Without his existence, would she have written those books? Would we have this roadmap to liberation?

He’s a paradox: the unhealed wound that birthed healing. A living testament to her theory—and its most glaring cautionary tale.

The Takeaway

The world fears Alice Miller—and truth-tellers like us—because we refuse to confuse knowledge with wisdom, credentials with courage. Real healing starts when we stop running from the child within.

The rest is noise.

Final Notes

• Stronger Opening: Now directly ties the film’s title to your own experience.

• Sharper Flow: Transitions between Martin, psychoanalysis, and your own writing are tighter.

• Punchier Quotes: Key lines hit harder.

• Ends with a Call to Clarity: No fluff—just the raw truth.

Want to amplify any section further? Or adjust the tone in places? Let me know—this is your voice, and it deserves to pierce through the silence.

Keep shining that lantern.

Abusive Procedures - Emotional Abuse in the Workplace

"Physical violence can be testified to be outside evidence: eyewitness, police, and medical reports. With emotional abuse, there is no proof. It's a clean violence. Nobody sees anything. Violence and abuse originate in companies when envy of power and perversity collide. The overpoweringly destructive examples of emotional abuse in couples are less likely to be found but, unfortunately, the small abuse of daily living that does exist in businesses are largely trivialized or ignored.

In companies, universities, and institutions, harassing or abusive procedures are more stereotypical than in the private arena. 

They are no less destructive, although the victims are less exposed because they often leave (illness or resignation) in order to survive. 

WHAT IS ABUSE?
By emotional abuse in the workplace, we mean any abusive conduct---whether by words, looks, gestures, or in writing---that infringes upon the personality, the dignity, or the physical or psychical integrity of a person; also, behavior that endangers the employment of said person or degrades the climate of the workplace.

… Businesses, as well as the media, have tended to focus on sexual harassment, which is only one aspect of harassment in the larger sense. This psychological war in the workplace consists of two elements:

. Abuse of power: often quickly revealed and not accepted by the employees

. Emotional manipulation: more insidious and more destructive from the beginning

Emotional abuse and harassment starts harmless enough and spread insidiously. Initially, the people involved are reluctant to take offense and gloss over quarrels and bullying. Later, the attacks multiply and the victim is regularly besieged; he is made to feel inferior and submitted to hostile and degrading maneuvers over a long period. Obviously, one does not drop dead on the spot as a result of these aggressions, but one does lose a part of oneself. One gets home every night worn out, humiliated, and damaged. It’s difficult to recover.

WHO IS TARGETED
Contrary to what their aggressors have others believe, victims are not, at the outset, particularly weak or mentally unhealthy individuals. Quite the opposite: harassment is often set in motion when a victim refuses to give in to a boss’s authoritarian procedures. She is targeted because of her capacity to resist authority, even under pressure. …

…The victim is stigmatized once the process of harassment gets going. They say she’s impossible to work with, has a terrible disposition, or even that she’s crazy. They attribute to her character the consequences of the conflict, forgetting what she was before or what she is now in another context. Pushed to the limit, she often becomes what the employer wants her to become

ISOLATION
Once the decision has been made to psychologically destroy an employee, in order to forestall any possible defense, the person must be isolated by breaking up potential alliances. It’s much more difficult to rebel if you’re alone, especially if you’ve been made to believe that everyone is against you. 

Excerpt from the book 

Stalking the Soul by Marie-France Hirigoyen Chapter about Emotional Abuse in the Work Place

Read about the harassment and emotional abuse I went through at my job of nine and a half years in the links below. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/02/emotional-abuse-in-workplace.html?m=1

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2016/09/the-word-safety-with-regard-to-women.html?m=1

Also, read the article in the link below:

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/05/toxic-workplaces-are-billion-dollar.html?m=1

Blame Shifting

Manipulation is when they blame you for your reaction to their disrespect.

In dysfunctional, toxic and narcissistic groups, friendly empaths are outcasted and scapegoated while predators and bullies are popular and glorified.

Narcissists only surround themselves with people who enable their behavior, ignore their behavior or encourage their behavior. Anyone who tries to hold them accountable will be accused and blamed of the exact things the narcissist is guilty of. And the people who know the truth, will remain silent.

A narcissist paints a picture of themselves as being the victim or innocent in all aspects. They will be offended by the truth. But what is done in the dark will come to light. Time has a way of showing people's true colors." KARLA GRIMES

When someone treats you like crap, just remember it's because there's something wrong with them, not you. Normal people don't go around destroying other people's lives.

When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you.

"The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did." Jill Blakeway

Narcissists cannot ever admit to any wrongdoing. Why would they? In their eyes, they don't ever do anything wrong. They think they don't make mistakes. What they do is blame others. It's called Blame Shifting.

"When the narcissist begins to think that someone will blame them for an action, they go into self-preservation mode and will deflect all blame from themselves and onto someone else. This is where the blame-shifting happens." 

"Narcissists THRIVE on manipulating our emotions to THEIR advantage! We MUST learn this and NEVER take anything they say seriously. They are purposely doing this to provoke us and to get a reaction that creates chaos, drama, and NEGATIVE emotions. Making people feel small, diminished, and on edge makes them feel superior, powerful, and in control of us!" From Greg Zaffuto's book From Charm to Harm and Everything Else in Between with a Narcissist

Pay very close attention to what your narcissist barks at you about Specifically what s/he accuses you of It's the closest thing to a confession you'll get.

"Narcissists will have everyone believing that because you speak up and talk about how they treated you with others, or because you cut contact with them, that you are out for revenge, or holding a grudge. In reality, all you are doing is using boundaries and holding them accountable"

"Holding a narcissist accountable for anything is thoroughly impossible. That's a fact. They will explode, reject, stonewall, deny, blame-shift and lie with absolutely no conscience or remorse. This is not "conflict avoidance." It is a pathological aversion to ACCOUNTABILITY."

"Agreeing to things just to keep the peace is actually a trauma response. When you do this, you're disrespecting your boundaries. No more making yourself uncomfortable for others to feel comfortable. You have control now. You run your life. Take up space and use your voice."

WHY NARCISSISTS WILL NEVER BE HAPPY No matter what type of relationships narcissists seek, they are never happy. They go about their lives seeking something that is not achievable because the ego has created the biggest fog especially for them.

If narcissists should be in a long term relationship, it is only to act as camouflage. Sort of leading a normal life but the lies, the cheating, the fakeness, the selfishness and the hate will always be there.

"WHY DO NARCISSISTS GET MARRIED? The answer is... Narcissists get married because they need a slave, a supply, and a source of gratification. Marriage for a narcissist is just a social license to use their partner as a housemaid, sex partner and a cook. For them, marriage also means a way to insult, blame shift, project their Insecurities on their partner. It is never about love, care or affection; it is all about the user."

The only principle that governs their minds is the question "How do I look?"

Narcissists are trapped in the mind of a two year old, and they possess no cognitive ability to reason, to negotiate, to cooperate, to give and take, to love, to empathize. Rather their lives consist of ultimatums, demands, greed, egocentric thinking, bullying, temper tantrums, silent treatments and a plethora of 'I WANTS' and 'GIVE ME'S'. My way or the highway

Most Therapies Slides Over to the Realm of the False Self

“Because of his early experiences with his mother, he cannot believe that this need not happen. If he gives way to this fear and adapts himself, the therapy slides over into the realm of the false self, and the true self remains hidden and undeveloped. 

It is therefore extremely important that the therapist not allow his own needs to impel him to formulate connections that the patient himself is discovering with the help of his own feelings. Otherwise, he is in danger of behaving like a friend who brings a good meal to a prisoner in his cell, at the precise moment when that prisoner has the chance to escape --- perhaps to spend his first night hungry and without shelter, but in freedom nevertheless. Since this first step into unknown territory would require a great deal of courage, the prisoner may comfort himself with his food and shelter and thus miss his chance and stay in prison.”

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2012/11/facing-and-feeling-repressed-emotions_29.html?m=1

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2016/02/quotes-from-book-drama-of-gifted-child.html

I Love all Animals

Animals are born innocent and die innocent. We can't say the same for most humans.

Many humans want to destroy me and my only crime also is that I exist and I want to do good in my life.

It's sad we live in a world where authentic real people are harassed, prosecuted and ostracized. and the liars, bullies and cheaters are protected and promoted...

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/08/it-was-attempt-of-psychological-lynch.html

For that scientists would have to find the courage to face their own childhood repression and who wants to do that?! After I published my book I have learned people rather kill or be killed than face their own painful truths...

"When a man loves cats, I am his friend and comrade without further introduction." --- Mark Twain

Non violence does not equal passivity

 A lot of people annoy me because some of the suggestions they give are to repress our true feelings and just to act loving and forgiving, but to get to a place of love and forgiveness we need to feel and express our true feelings responsibly.

Forgiveness is a gift that comes to us naturally at the end of feeling our painful feelings and emotions. There is no need to preach forgiveness; otherwise, forgiveness becomes a lid to keep our pain repressed.

We can’t be afraid to speak up and express how we feel and how we see things. Some of the People that write to me are a great example of how they use spirituality to run from their true painful feelings.

They are too afraid to face and feel the painful truths in their own lives. Repressing our pain and emotions is the root problem of the violence we witness in the world.

Most people live in the illusion that is part of the solution, but because they are still repressed, in reality, they are part of the problem. The article in the link below shows eloquently how spirituality can cement blindness.

http://www.alice-miller.com/en/the-longest-journey/

My experience has been the same as Dr. Alice Miller’s, it has been a very long journey, and it has taken me also all of my life to finally free myself of all the crutches and get two healthy legs to stand on.

If we want to free ourselves we have to face, acknowledge, articulate, and feel our painful truth.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2020/03/the-wall-of-silence-in-media-is.html

Also, read my blog Spirituality and Religion Are Blinders that Hide the Truth

Abuse of Power

It's so sad that in the 21 century people still are debating if it's ok to spank a child. In the 21 century everyone should know the dangers of spanking children and every person in power should be doing everything to make sure every child is protected from harm. Would we be debating today if slavery of black people or any other race is ok, fortunately is common knowledge that slavery of another race is cruel and ignorant. Why can't human beings see that doing it to children is even more cruel, ignorant and very dangerous?

Hi C,

I am so sorry it took me so long to answer your letter. First I like to congratulate you for your courage to speak up about the abuse you suffer at the hands of a sadistic teacher.

What she did was a crime, but sadly crimes against children still go unrecognized and unpunished by society at large. You say that your parents did nothing to protect you and they themselves were abusive towards you.

Usually, that’s the case, parents lay the ground and make their children vulnerable to abusers, schools and all society’s institutions are very happy to continue the abuse that parents started at home.

Your parents deserve most of your justified anger for abusing you and making you vulnerable to abusers that crossed your path and for not taking any steps to protect you from an extremely abusive sadistic teacher.

I think it’s great that you are using your support group, a safe place, to start speaking up about your abuse and how you feel.

I feel is very important we feel the repressed intense excruciating feelings of the child we once were towards our real abusers and allow those wounds to heal first naturally before we go into the general public seeking justice, because if we are still repressed and wounded we run the risk of feeling victimized all over again by people that act similar and remind us of our childhood abusers triggering our repressed excruciating intense feelings and making us lose our balance and cool when we need it the most to make a stand for ourselves and other children.

Unfortunately, most people in our society in power positions are wounded children themselves and they don’t want to be reminded of the abuse that is why they unconsciously and compulsively worked so hard to be in power over others, so they would not have to face and feel the abuse they suffered at their parents' hands when they were defenseless little children remaining endless scared little children to face and question their own internalized parents and they use unconsciously and compulsively the same tactics to silence others the same way their parents silence them, but if we have resolved our own repression we will be able to keep our composure when we encounter repressed and unconscious people in power positions.

I did not suffer the extreme abuse you suffered. I was hit in the head and hands by teachers and constantly emotionally humiliated in front of the class for not spelling my words correctly and not giving the answers the teachers wanted to hear, but never went to the extreme of them removing my clothes and spanking me in my bare bottom. What happened to you is completely an extreme abuse of power and is also sexual abuse, because I have no doubt the teacher has some type of sexual gratification by putting your pants down and spanking your bare bottom and for sure she should be brought to justice for crimes against children that are the worst crimes against humanity, but society chooses to look the other way.

You say: “My father was also extremely abusive verbally, emotionally and somewhat physically. I am single. I will remain single so as to not infect anyone with my father's genes. I swore his DNA would end with me but my brother and sister have children so...

I will not have children and wouldn't want to do to them what was done to me. I might be a spanker and wouldn't want to have their sexuality corrupted by these abusive spankings. It wasn't/isnt worth the risk. I've read no books and had no special therapy”

I congratulate you for your courage to see what happened to you -- your fear of passing it into others -- is very understandable and I am so sorry you sacrificed getting close to others and your fatherhood.

I too felt the same way as you and I used to say to myself: the pain stops in me, but it does not have to be this way. Genes have nothing to do with it. We can learn to take responsibility for our feelings and resolve our repression and become open to entering into relationships with people that also have become conscious of their own history and taking responsibility for their own repressed feelings and no longer unconsciously and compulsively do into others what once was done to them when they were defenseless little children.

I suggest you read Alice Miller’s books and visit her website

www.alice-miller.com

her books and website helped me resolve my own repression and liberate myself and become a voice for other children.

I wish you courage and strength on your journey to liberation and much success in becoming a strong voice for children still suffering at the hands of ignorant adults.

Sylvie

The Roots of Violence are NOT Unknown

The misled brain and the banned emotions

The Facts:

1. The development of the human brain is use-dependent. The brain develops its structure in the first four years of life, depending on the experiences the environment offers the child. The brain of a child who has mostly loving experiences will develop differently from the brain of a child who has been treated cruelly.

2. Almost all children on our planet are beaten in the first years of their lives. They learn from the start violence, and this lesson is wired into their developing brains. No child is ever born violent. Violence is NOT genetic, it exists because beaten children use, in their adult lives, the lesson that their brains have learned.

3. As beaten children are not allowed to defend themselves, they must suppress their anger and rage against their parents who have humiliated them, killed their inborn empathy, and insulted their dignity. They will take out this rage later, as adults, on scapegoats, mostly on their own children. Deprived of empathy, some of them will direct their anger against themselves (in eating disorders, drug addiction, depression, etc.), or against other adults (in wars, terrorism, delinquency, etc.)

Questions and Answers:

Q: Parents beat their children without a second thought, to make them obedient. Nobody, except a very small minority, protests against this dangerous habit. Why is the logical sequence (from being a misled victim to becoming a misleading perpetrator) totally ignored worldwide? Why have even the Popes, responsible for the moral behavior of many millions of believers, until now never informed them that beating children is a crime?

A: Because almost ALL of us were beaten, and we had to learn very early that these cruel acts were normal, harmless, and even good for us. Nobody ever told us that they were crimes against humanity. The wrong, immoral, and absurd lesson was wired into our developing brains, and this explains the emotional blindness governing our world.

Q: Can we free ourselves from the emotional blindness we developed in childhood?

A: We can – at least to some degree – liberate ourselves from this blindness by daring to feel our repressed emotions, including our fear and forbidden rage against our parents who had often scared us to death for periods of many years, which should have been the most beautiful years of our lives. We can’t retrieve those years. But thanks to facing our truth we can transform ourselves from the children who still live in us full of fear and denial into responsible, well-informed adults who regained their empathy, so early stolen from them. By becoming feeling persons we can no longer deny that beating children is a criminal act that should be forbidden on the whole planet.

Conclusion:

Caring for the emotional needs of our children means more than giving them a happy childhood. It means to enable the brains of the future adults to function in a healthy, rational way, free from perversion and madness. Being forced to learn in childhood that hitting children is a blessing for them is a most absurd, confusing lesson, one with the most dangerous consequences: This lesson as such, together with being cut off from the true emotions, creates the roots of violence.

www.alice-miller.com
© 2015 Alice Miller

http://www.alice-miller.com/en/the-roots-of-violence-are-not-unknown/