Echoism Is the Little-Known Condition that Affects Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

Echoism Is the Little-Known Condition that Affects Victims of Narcissistic Abuse

Comments on facebook from the sharing of the article in the link above.

Sylvie Imelda Shene Interesting! Saving the link to read later.


K L K M:  Sylvie Imelda Shene it’s a different lens for understanding the victims and survivors. New insights always excite me. Healing is a lifelong journey!

Sylvie Imelda Shene Yes, I agree healing is a lifelong journey. And once you find freedom -- you always have to deal with people crossing your path trying to stand in symbolizing your childhood abusers -- reminding you of the painful past -- or triggering flashbacks. 

They're too many abusers in our society masquerading as "helpers" and good people waiting for you to make a mistake to grab on and regress you to the state of the wounded child and put their hands on you to bring you back into an emotional prison -- they want to steal and gain ownership over your story -- and have power over you. 

They can wait on the sidelines all they want because I will never give them the opportunity to put their hands on me -- see them very clearly everywhere -- like this psychologist in the Netherlands that even went through the trouble to change her name to mess with my mind so I wouldn't know who she was. 

I get it! And understand! Why so many malignant narcissists and sociopaths target me. Who I’m I?! An ex-topless dancer and a gate attendant that never went to college could possibly know more about the human mind than them that went to college and have spent all of their lives working so hard and studying -- memorizing knowledge --- which they use like robots or parrots to fool others and manipulate them to act exactly the part they want you to act in their twisted drama.
http://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/04/most-therapists-keep-themselves-others.html


K L K M: Sylvie Imelda Shene so grateful for your resilience! You continue to heal and help others heal and flourish. Boundary awareness is so important! Our toxic antennae is very similar! I can spot and sense toxic behaviors a mile away! Steering clear isn’t always easy as we know. But knowing we can set strong, firm boundaries is crucial. And we can never let down our guard if we want to keep ourselves safe. There’s safety in numbers thank goodness!


Sylvie Imelda Shene Thank you for your kind words, K L K M. Glad you too can spot toxic behavior a mile away. No, it's not always easy to steering clear of toxic behavior, especially in the workplace. We have to be constantly vigilant and protect ourselves.

S G: I've seen it. I've lived it. Not pretty. Remember who you are deep down. The person who claims to love you the most should lift your spirits not douse them. Save your words for someone with genuine compassion as there is NOTHING you can say to this personality type without an argument. YOU ARE ALWAYS GOOD ENOUGH

K L K M: S G, so well said!! And wonderful advice from someone who’s lived this! I’m sorry for what you endured and I’m grateful for your resilience. I just love the part “remember who you are!” Beautiful! Because if we can hold onto this, we won’t lose who we truly are inside. It can happen with enough gaslighting! Thank you for sharing and for being you. Beautiful on the inside and out!

Sylvie Imelda Shene Finally, I had time to read the whole article. No doubt I identify with it! 
"Recovery from this abuse is totally possible. You need kind people to listen to you and validate you.” 

Good luck finding authentic kind enlightened witnesses to listen and validate you. After being the target of a mob of sociopaths, malignant narcissists or whatever you like to call them. I was left alone, especially by mental health professionals that should have been the first ones to reach out to me and make sure I was okay and listen to me. From my experience, most people are acting as if personality, saying all the right things pretending to be good people, but are wolves in sheep's clothing. 

Like I wrote to someone that wrote me defending the psychologist from the Netherlands that tried to mess with my mind: "If your idolized Lilianne/Olane is such a compassionate person that cares so much about others --- how come she didn’t reach out to me with a kind word of support when I was being targeted by a mob of sociopaths at my job of nine and half years after I published my book in 2014? I know she is following my blog incognito and witnessed everything that was taking place. 

She didn’t care, because she is a malignant narcissist or a sociopath like them. She was witnessing an attempt of a psychological lynching and said nothing and most likely hoping they would succeed in destroying me for her sadist enjoyment and put her own fears of exposure to rest. 

She sat with her critique for four years and then she publishes it after changing her name! She never predicted that I would figure out that Olane Roos and Liliane Rombout is one and the same! If this is not a calculated move of a malignant narcissist to try to discredit someone’s work -- then I don’t know what a calculated malignant narcissist is?!" 
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/04/comments-from-blog-about-olane-roos-or.html

Alice Miller has been the only authentic witness in my life and if I had not had become my own enlightened witness with the help of her books, website, and ‎correspondence -- I would not have survived -- I would have been thrown over the edge like we constantly witness in the stage of the world many victims of malignant narcissists abuse being thrown over the edge. 

From my experience, a lot of mental health professionals say nice things and come up with great theories, but because have not resolved their own childhood repression and liberate themselves from the emotional prison of childhood cannot provide real assistance to their patients or clients and end up causing more harm. 
https://www.alice-miller.com/en/the-essential-role-of-an-enlightened-witness-in-society-2/

Just like I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom page 173 "But thanks to Alice Miller, I’m content to be who I am regardless of what other people think. This passage, from Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, sums it up so well: “To live with one’s own truth is to be at home with oneself. That is the opposite of isolation. We only need confirmation when we are alienated from ourselves and in flight from the truth. All the friends and devoted admirers in the world cannot make up for the loss.”

And this is why I survived being the target of a mob of sociopaths or malignant narcissists because -- I live with my truth -- I'm at home with myself -- and no longer waiting for validation and confirmation from others --- otherwise I would not have survived a mob of sociopaths at my job of nine and a half years all conspiring for my demise.

Read my blog Experienced Knowledge about my experience with emotional harassment in the workplace.

Miley Cyrus is giving the world the middle finger

I thought I would share here some comments I made on someone's Facebook status about the Miley Cyrus saga.  

She is 20 years old and lost like most people in the rest of the world. Let’s not demand more from a 20-year-old than we do from the rest of the world. They are a lot of people and a lot older with that same or even bigger platform masquerading as responsible, loving caring people making millions of dollars selling the same old recycled seductive lies and half-truths that do a lot more harm under the disguise of help. They are nothing but cult leaders promoting others cult leaders misleading and deceiving the public, like for example, a lady whose name starts with an O. I don’t want to say her name, because right now I don’t want to deal with the backlash because sadly most people are just like little children that cannot bear the truth about their parents and will defend and attack anyone that dears to expose the big lies or illusions of people standing in symbolizing their mother/father. At least Miley Cyrus is not deceiving anyone! She was just acting silly and using her sexuality to get attention and make money!

That was my thought too. If it was a guy sticking the tongue out and grabbing his crotch in a disgusting way no one would care. This gender bias in our society has always pissed me off since I was a little girl. And the truth be told. She was exploited as a child and taught that money and fame was the most important thing in life. Every artist is trying to communicate something in a symbolic way and if we judge the artist and his/her art form instead of trying to understand its language, we miss the message. What I see from her performance is that she is disgusted and pissed off. Her anger is justified because she has been exploited by everyone in her life since she was born and now as an adult, she is grabbing herself in a disgusting way and sticking her tongue out at the world and she really saying: Fxxx you all! She is stuck in a time capsule like the rest of the world and the only difference between her and the rest of the world is that she is in a time capsule with a lot of more money! But at least she is not deceiving anyone like most people in our society in power positions pretending to have it all together behind a pretty façade fooling everyone and blocking the truth that could save the world, so they don’t have to face and feel their own painful truths. I hope Miley finds true freedom from her time capsule before she dies. Madonna use to bug me a lot more with her every calculated move, but her just like Miley is stuck in a time capsule and I don’t think Madonna will ever find true freedom before she dies. This quote by Alice Miller comes to mind: “It is not true that evil, destructiveness, and perversion inevitably form part of human existence, no matter how often this is maintained. But it is true that we are daily producing more evil and, with it, an ocean of suffering for millions that is absolutely avoidable. When one day the ignorance arising from childhood repression is eliminated and humanity has awakened, an end can be put to the production of evil.” — Alice Miller, Banished Knowledge, p. 141

You see their plan worked beautifully! They wanted to make money and they did it! They all are giving the hypocrites of world the middle finger! :-) "Despite the scorn earned by her performance of “Blurred Lines,” Cyrus has since sold 90,000 digital downloads of her new track “Wrecking Ball BLL -0.87%,” which debuted the day of the VMAs. The song now sits at No. 13 on Billboard‘s digital songs chart. The impact has been even broader in social media. According to data outfit MusicMetric, the former Hannah Montana star has seen a 112% rise in activity over the week before, adding 226,273 new Facebook FB +0.06% fans and 213,104 new Twitter followers from August 24 to August 28.
Her manager reportedly summed up her VMA performance quite simply: “It could not have gone better.”"http://www.forbes.com/sites/zackomalleygreenburg/2013/08/30/miley-cyrus-and-the-vma-aftermath-the-latest-numbers/

By the way, I never heard the word twerking before and I didn't know its meaning until now! J
According to Quartz, the word "twerk" has even been added to the Oxford Dictionaries Online. "Twerk" has been defined as "a dance to popular music in a sexually provocative manner involving thrusting hip movements and a low, squatting stance."

Lady Gaga has to be really pissed! I heard she was almost naked on stage! But I don’t see any videos of her anywhere! She probably said to herself: damn it I got naked for nothing! :-)
Miley whatever you do in the future just don’t go sit on Oprah’s couch! Please don’t let that woman exploit you like everyone else!

Also, this quote by Alice Miller just came to mind:

"The tragedy is that of early psychic injuries and their inevitable repression, which allows the child to survive. In a broad sense, it is the tragedy of almost everyone: As chil­dren we strive, above all else, to accommodate our parents' demands - spoken and unspoken, reasonable and unreason­able. In the process, we blind ourselves to our true needs and feelings. In our adult lives, this is like trying to sail a ship without a compass. Not knowing who we are, what we feel, and what we need, even as grown-ups we remain sub­ject to the expectations placed upon us from the very begin­ning of our lives, expectations we fulfilled not for love but for the illusion of love. Without that illusion, we could not have survived childhood." Read more in the link below:
http://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2012/08/introduction-to-revised-edition-1995.html


Some people can't let go of Miley Cyrus and someone posted a video of this hypocritical woman projecting her shame on Miley. Here are my comments on that video.

 She is so annoying and no way I can't get through the whole video! I rather have Miley Cyrus any day, has a much more pleasant voice to listen to and is much sexier! I wish people stopped the judging and the slut shaming already.

I feel sorry for her kids to be raised by such a self-righteous and judgmental mother.

Actually, she doesn’t. The internet allows everyone to show their faces, their emotional insights as well as their emotional blindness. Miley is being more emotionally honest unlike the girl in the video that is being emotionally dishonest and with the aid of hypocrisy covertly is passing or transferring her unresolved repressed shame from her own childhood into her children and Miley made herself vulnerable for the collective repressed shame of society to be transferred into her. She seems to be a pretty mature girl having fun and enjoying her sexuality and doesn’t care what anyone thinks, because if she takes in society’s collective repressed shame it will destroy her.

Below is my comment to the open letter of Sinead O'Connor to Miley Cyrus:

Why can’t people let go of Miley Cyrus. Sinead O'Connor suffers from what I like to call the prodigal son syndrome, she used to be a rebel, but came a day when she could no longer cope alone with her painful emotions and turned to religion for help, didn’t she even became a priest herself?! Religion/god is the substitute parent figure and remains a child stuck in her childhood drama that never broke free and now she is slut shaming other young people like once she was shamed. The compulsion to do to others what once was done to us is very hard to stop. She is shaming Miley Cyrus under the disguise of wanting to help. It is exactly what happened to her when she was a young girl. She is reenacting unconsciously and compulsively her childhood drama, but now she is the one doing the shaming instead of being shamed, she just reversed the roles, that’s all.

Good comments on my Facebook post below:
 https://www.facebook.com/sylne/posts/10151747241058922?comment_id=27104709

We can do what the fxxx we want and enjoy doing as long it doesn’t hurt ourselves and others, AND we are not doing it to run away from our painful truths and from feeling our painful feelings/soul, our true feelings are our soul, so if you can’t feel and go on repressing your authentic feelings with the aid of money, religion, drugs, medication, alcohol, sex, relationships, yoga or whatever illusion your head creates to distract yourself from your authentic feelings, you are repressing your soul and therefore living without a soul acting as if personality deceiving yourself and others. Just like the German-Swiss alchemist and physician Paracelsus established some 500 years ago, "Poison is in everything, and no thing is without poison. The dosage makes it either a poison or a remedy." And as Alice miller says: “There are plenty of means to combat symptoms of distress: medications, sermons, numerous ‘treatments,’ ‘miracles,’ threats, cults, pedagogical indoctrination, and even blackmail, they can all work for a while, but only because they reinforce the repression and reinforce the fear of resolving it. … A lot of money and fame comes from this business of repression because it satisfies the longing of so many grown-up children: to be loved as a good child. … In the long term, we have to pay a high price for this repression.” Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, page 126

I wish people stayed out of other people sexuality, teenagers, or not teenagers, just give young people the facts how their body works and how to protect themselves and respect everyone’s choices of when, how and with whom they choose to express themselves sexually! As long they are equal partners, other people's sexuality is nobody’s business. Not having sexual education based on facts and reality is in itself sexual abuse.

Evil is Born Anew with Every New Generation

Hi E,

Thank you for writing!

I know how hard it is to get things taped. I want to make more videos, but it’s hard to make good ones! I’m thinking about buying a teleprompter so I don’t have to memorize the text of what I like to say. 

To tell you the truth, I’m kind of giving up on humanity, and I don’t feel like trying anymore to reach those like me, who feel all alone -- waiting to hear the truth that can set us free, like I once was.

I have put out there my testimony of the steps to take to free oneself. Now those like me that want it, they have to do their part and dig hard and deep like I did to find the truth that can set us free, because the sociopaths and charlatans of this world will work very hard day and night to distract the masses and bury the naked truth very deep and make it very difficult for people like me to find it.  Because if the naked truth reached many people like me, their pretty lies and illusions would crumble like a house of cards, and they would lose all their power over others.

This is why I keep getting targeted by sociopaths, because they feel threatened by me and my book, so they want to break me down to discredit me and my book. 

Liliane Rombout or Olane Roos – whatever she calls herself now- the Netherlands psychologist who broke the camel’s back. 

It’s unbelievable, and I still can’t believe that this woman contacted me, acting all understanding and saying all the right things to gain my trust. Still, the moment I let her in and let her read my manuscript, she wasted no time looking for something in it that she could grab on to turn on me and play mind games with me -- to try to regress me into the emotional prison of my childhood -- to discredit me and my book.

She never saw me in my book or heard me; she just saw her own projections and what she wanted to see to use as tools for manipulation. And then, when she was not able to regress me into the state of the wounded child, she sat for 4 years with her critique full of her own projections, and changed her name before publishing her critique. She never predicted that I would figure out that Liliane Rombout and Olane Roos are one and the same.

I see clearly the games people play, and I’m free from all people’s projections. I no longer allow anyone to stand in symbolize my childhood abusers to manipulate me to bring me back to the emotional prison of my childhood. Free at last!!!

Isn’t this a calculated move of a malignant narcissist or sociopath?!

Malignant narcissists and sociopaths in the mental health profession are the worst because they have mastered the art of manipulating people's repressed emotions to do exactly what they want -- they are the most deceiving and cause a lot of harm.

I guess she didn’t believe what I wrote in my book that I had consciously experienced and understood the repressed emotions of the child I once was within the context of my own childhood and no longer they can be used by sociopaths, psychopaths or malignant narcissists to grab on to use as reins to manipulate me and gain control over me to bring me back to an emotional prison.

Let's make it easy. Narcissist... Sociopath..... Psychopath... there is no need to distinguish which is which. They all suffer from "childhood repression who have grown into a full-blown malignant person." Avoidance is the only known treatment

I will still try to write to everyone who writes to me, but from now on, I will be very careful and not trust anyone who contacts me, saying all the right things, because most likely, they are not real -- it’s a lie. Just like Alice Miller wrote me in an e-mail: “I have learned over the years of my work on the internet that there are readers who SEEM to understand SOME of what I have written, at least intellectually, but they are still so afraid of their very cruel parents and of their repressed FEELINGS of rage towards them that they are constantly looking for scapegoats.

They thus live in a continual confusion, pretending that they are healed and even offering help and empathy to others. But eventually they use unconsciously other people (even the ones who are quite friendly to them) as a poisonous container like their parents did to them, and if the offended people begin to defend themselves they can become very mean.

I can only urge you to trust your feelings and do NOT offer your empathy and interest to everybody just because they say they read and understood everything I have written. In most of the cases, it is a lie. To understand my books means to overcome the fear of one’s parents, to honestly feel the justified rage TOWARD THEM and to no longer use others to get free from the accumulated rage.”

Obviously, Liliane Rombout or Olane Roos, she is still scared of the repressed emotions of the child she once was at her own mean mother, otherwise, would not have looked on the internet for someone she could target to project herself into and use as her scapegoat.

What Really Makes Narcissists Tick, “The characteristic subjective experience of narcissistic individuals is a sense of inner emptiness and meaninglessness that requires recurrent infusions of external confirmation of their importance and value. . . . When the environment fails to provide such evidence, narcissistic individuals feel depressed, ashamed, and envious of those who succeed in attaining the supplies that they lack.”

Narcissists are very prone to jealousy and envy. They will devalue the accomplishments of others, especially of scapegoats. If they feel someone is a threat, they devalue this person in general, talking negatively to others behind this person's back. Other times, they will give backhanded compliments or focus on the negative when someone is experiencing success or when they are discussing achievements. If someone is experiencing success, the narcissist will turn this around and accuse this person of being selfish or narcissistic for talking about it. ~Traci Dillard

Every time there is a mass shooting or a celebrity commits suicide, they all talk about the importance of mental health and share the phone number for National Suicide Prevention Lifeline --  that all it does is to make themselves feel better and fool the masses that they care --- their lies and mind games is what pushes some people over the edge, because they are tired of performing. They can no longer live pretending and acting as if personality, and they give up, killing themselves, others, or both.

I’m done, I just want to be left alone to enjoy my freedom and peace for the rest of my life. It was a long journey! 

I just wish sociopaths, psychopaths and malignant narcissists stopped targeting me and left me alone --  and gave up on trying to bring me back into an emotional prison -- but I understand that nothing triggers their jealousy and hatred more than a seeing a truly happy and free person and are driven blindly by jealousy and hatred.   And to protect myself, I have to keep  long bridges from people and not cross it too often in order to enjoy my freedom and peace for the rest of my life.

People need to understand that once you go through your worst time alone, you really don't care who stays in your life anymore.

They say, "Misery loves Company." Well, I say, "Narcissists love to bring happy people down." What BETTER type of power trip to a narcissist's ego than to take a naturally happy person and, by their own "arising abilities," turn them into a shell of their former selves while walking off "wearing their skin"? You know that they WANT to see you lying on the sidewalk, crying out in pain because you're "nothing" without them; just as they told you (or insinuated many times). ~ANA (After Narcissistic Abuse)

Eventually, I still want to write and publish “Reenactment” for those searching for the naked truth about the real face of humanity, it is ugly, very ugly!!! And sometimes I think no one is really out there.

Thanks to writing and publishing A Dance to Freedom, I got to see how ugly it really is! I always felt and suspected it -- that it was very ugly, but thanks to my book, I got to see it really close, staring it in the face at a very close range. It was dangerous to be that close to it, and now I have no doubt humanity is evil. The more I come to the conclusion that very few people out there are capable of being real and authentic.

Evil is born anew with every new generation. Humanity is insane, and this insanity will end only when humanity is wiped off the face of the Earth. Maybe, that's why they are creating AI to wipe out most of humanity...

Humanity is unconsciously and compulsively shackled into the chains of compulsion repetition...

Evil is born anew with every new generation
https://www.alice-miller.com/en/the-ignorance-or-how-we-produce-the-evil/

Human beings are great at creating illusions. And the sharper their intellect is, the bigger the illusions they create. When it comes to humanity, nothing ever is what it seems.

No one can ever accuse me of being an obedient child! Thank goodness I had the courage to rebel against the system from a young age.  

Enough talking about humanity! Enjoy your weekend,

Sylvie

People Rather Kill Themselves, others or both than Face the Fears of Being Alone and Feel the pain to Become Real

Dear HH,

Thank you for sharing and translating the beautiful song Erkläre mir die Liebe by Philipp Poisel into English.

Explain "love" to me

Like two dogs under the sky, heading towards the night.
So lost and so different.  Do you know, what you really want???
When will you catch me from this darkness?
Tell me, where you are!

Please explain life to me,
I don't know, how it works.

Like two foxes in the polar sea, constantly heading for the night.
I haven't slept for a long time
Do you know, what you actually need?

When will you catch me, in this hot snow of july?
Two times summer, and back

Please, explain life to me
cause I don't know how it works.

Tell me about love.
I have never seen it.

When will you catch me.
In the hot snow of July?
Two times Sommer and back.

Tell me about your Life.
i have never seen you like this.

Tell me about love.
I have lost before i ever had it.

It describes beautifully most people’s and once my condition. Lost and searching for love all in the wrong places.

Love is within. And the only way to experience true love -- we must resolve our own childhood repression -- and after that love that’s all, there is – understanding equals to love -- but the path to resolving our childhood repression is not an easy path, and most people don’t have the space, courage, and strength to take. So far I only know me and Alice Miller to really have taken this path.

It took me more than 40 years all alone and thanks to the the books and the website of Alice Miller as my enlightened witness to arrive at this place and here I’m all alone because I don’t know anyone else that is truly on this path and have arrived at this place of true love, peace, and freedom.

Alice Miller was the only one I know that arrived at this place and took her also more than 40 years because, she, like me, was alone most of her journey and had to battle many sociopaths/psychopaths, even her own son. I’m pretty sure he is a full blown sociopath with a sharp intellect knowing exactly what to say to fool everyone, make them feel sorry for him and manipulate people to join him in his emotional prison -- because if he was real -- I have no doubt we would have communicated with each other by now -- he has no courage to consciously feel the repressed emotions of the child he once was -- and liberate himself -- he is too afraid to be alone in his emotional prison -- just like this proclaimed psychologist from the Netherlands -- Liliane Rombout or Olane Roos – whatever she calls herself now.

I still can’t believe it that this woman contacted me acting all understanding and saying all the rights things to gain my trust, but the moment I let her in and let her read my manuscript, she wasted no time looking for something in it that she could grab on to turn on me and play mind games with me -- to try to regress me into the emotional prison of my childhood -- to try to discredit me and my book.

She never saw me in my book or heard me, she just saw her own projections and what she wanted to see to use as tools for manipulation. And then when she was not able to regress me at the time, she sits 4 years with her critique full with her own projections and changes her name before publishing her critique. She never predicted that I would figure out that Liliane Rombout and Olane Roos is one and the same.

I see clearly the games people play and I’m free from all people’s projections and I no longer allow anyone standing in symbolizing my childhood abusers to manipulate me to bring me back to the emotional prison of my childhood. Free at last!!!

Isn’t this a calculated move of a malignant narcissist or sociopath?!

Malignant narcissists and sociopaths in the mental health profession are the worst because they have mastered the art of manipulating people's repressed emotions to do exactly what they want -- they are the most deceiving and cause a lot of harm.

I guess she didn’t believe what I wrote in my book that I had consciously experienced and understood the repressed emotions of the child I once was within the context of my own childhood and no longer can they be used by sociopaths, psychopaths or malignant narcissists to grab on to use as reins to manipulate me and gain control over me to bring me back to an emotional prison.

I will still try to write to everyone that writes to me but from now on I will be very careful and not trust anyone that contacts me saying all the right things, because most likely -- they are not real -- it’s a lie. Just like Alice Miller wrote me in an e-mail: “I have learned over the years of my work on the internet that there are readers who SEEM to understand SOME of what I have written, at least intellectually, but they are still so afraid of their very cruel parents and of their repressed FEELINGS of rage towards them that they are constantly looking for scapegoats.

They thus live in a continual confusion pretending that they are healed and even offering help and empathy to others. But eventually they use unconsciously other people (even the ones who are quite friendly to them) as a poisonous container like their parents did to them, and if the offended people begin to defend themselves they can become very mean.

I can only urge you to trust your feelings and do NOT offer your empathy and interest to everybody just because they say they read and understood everything I have written. In most of the cases, it is a lie. To understand my books means to overcome the fear of one’s parents, to honestly feel the justified rage TOWARD THEM and to no longer use others to getting free from the accumulated rage.”

 Obviously Liliane Rombout or Olane Roos, she still scared of the repressed emotions of the child she once was at her own mean mother, otherwise, would not have looked on the internet for someone she could target to project herself into and use as her scapegoat.

She broke the camel’s back and from now on I just want to be left alone to enjoy for the rest of my life my freedom and peace. It was a long journey!

But eventually, I still want to write and publish “Reenactment” for those searching for the whole naked truth about the real face of humanity, it is ugly, very ugly!!! I ask myself many times: is anything real out there?!

Thanks to writing and publishing A Dance to Freedom I got to see how ugly it really is!!! I always felt and suspected it -- that it was very ugly, but thanks to my book I got to see it really close -- staring it in the face -- at a very close range -- it was dangerous to be that close to evil, and now I have no doubt humanity is evil -- cancer. And the more I come to the conclusion that very few people out there are capable of being real and authentic.

I understand your fear of sharing your authentic feelings with people around you. Becoming real and authentic is very risky because most likely people around us will turn on us -- as you witnessed in my case -- we have to be strong enough to stand alone on our own two feet because most likely people will ostracize us and we find ourselves alone. Most people are fake, acting as if personality, and feel threatened by real liberated people because real authentic people trigger their fears of exposure and they will gather all forces at their command to destroy you so they can go on, as usual, acting as if personality and sell to the masses their lies and illusions.

I have learned nothing scares people more than facing and feeling their own painful truths that they rather kill themselves, others or both than face the fears of being alone and feel the pain to become real.

Wishing courage and strength,

Sylvie

Take a risk or live the rest of our lives in solitude

Dear H,

Thank you for writing. 

I’m so sorry to hear you are not in a good place.

If you can’t show your true feelings towards L or K, maybe it's because the little girl within you doesn’t trust them fully, and you need to accept that at this time, but most importantly, can the little girl within you trust the adult in you to show you and express to you her authentic feelings? 

I have learned most, if not all, people out there are not safe to express our authentic feelings with, because of their unresolved repression, they will most likely turn against you sooner or later in one form or another.  Some are passive-aggressive, standing on the sidelines, witnessing and hoping that another malignant narcissist or sociopath succeeds in breaking you down.  This has been my experience since I published my book; if I didn’t have truly resolved my repression, I would have been broken down by now, especially with the sociopaths in the “mental health field.” Why haven't any congratulated me on my incredible journey to liberation? Still, I feel, they all stand on the sidelines silently hoping a sociopath eventually succeeds in regressing me to the emotional prison of my childhood and finish the job to break my spirit or murder my soul that my childhood abusers started and were not able to finish.

I think Alice Miller was the only genuine, honest, and authentic person out there because I’m pretty sure if they were more out there, I would have found them or they would have seen me by NOW! And this is why Alice Miller was constantly persecuted and deceived by people pretending to be genuine, just as I’m experiencing. Her experience is my experience. She was alone, just like I am. Even those who worked closely with her are not real. I would never have discovered how fake they are if I hadn't written and published my book. And just for that, I'm delighted I wrote and published my book. What the public sees and the reality behind the scenes are two completely different things, and I would never have gained insight into the latter if I had not written and published my book. 

Alice took a risk with them, just as I have been taking a risk with people, hoping they wouldn’t turn on me. However, I know that no matter who I get involved with, there is always the chance they might turn on me at any time. Still, there is no other choice; we either take a risk or live the rest of our lives in solitude and never get involved with anyone again, which I’m totally okay with. For now, I choose to take a risk.

But the silence of those sitting on the sidelines is more hurtful than the ones that dare to come after me, because those that come after me, I can shine the light on them. They expose themselves, but the ones sitting on the sidelines, they stay hiding in the dark like cockroaches praying and hoping someone eventually succeeds in breaking me and declare me mentally instable to discredit me and my book, so their own fears of being exposed for the fraud that they are can be put to rest, they are a bunch of cowards hoping someone else does their dirty work, so they hands stay clean.

It’s impossible to have honest personal relationships with people who have not faced or are not willing to look in the mirror to face their own repression. And those who appear to be good at personal relationships have just mastered the art of faking it to perfection. 

“…but if I say, that I carry a lot of hate towards her… [well most of this hate most like belong towards your parents or childhood caregivers and once understood and felt in the right context  this hate should start to subside, and some of this hate might be caused by k because she might not be there the way you need her to be] ..it is hate I bear towards myself… [here you making yourself the scapegoat and this is one major reason you stay stuck because you blame yourself and not the real culprits that hurt you when you were a defenseless and powerless little girl.]  Sylvie, the more I write, the more I feel the pain and the invasiveness of my writings... [This is good, keep on writing.]  Life is not about thoughts; it is about emotions. And I am not there. [Just try to feel a little bit at the time, you can’t do it all at once, be patient with the little girl within yourself, the more it starts trusting you, the more it will express and reveal to you]

I don't want to lose you, even if I think all this Alice Miller stuff has ruined my life. This sounds crazy and weird. [You can’t lose me! But what would be really tragic is if you lose yourself. Blaming Alice Miller for ruining your life is again making someone else your scapegoat and letting the real culprits go scot-free. This is why you stay stuck and can’t move on, because you have a hard time understanding and putting all your feelings in the right context. Once we understand and consciously feel all of our feelings in the right context, they start to diminish pretty quickly. Like a little child that is allowed to express her/his authentic feelings, they will get through her/his hurt feelings pretty rapidly and will go back to playing freely and enjoying life.] 

With L, I have the feeling that she touches me very deeply inside. She wants me to be honest. This is a chance to change my life… She wants to know if I want to spend time with her or not. It is a general question, not a thing of a timetable... she deserves an answer. And I don't know what to say... and this is what irritates her...[Being honest with ourselves and others is always good and a must, because only with honesty and the truth can we make a consciously informed decision; otherwise, our relationships are a lie. I witness most relationships out there are a lie glued by fear of being alone.]

I don't want to be the bad person, to say no, but she would stand this,  one should be able to say yes or no, or not at the moment, or something, and why so... " I don't know" is not a grown-up answer. I ran away from something with her. " I can't tell" is the only answer I can give her.  I would rather kill myself than say yes or no.”[If you don’t know, then you are giving her an honest answer -- don’t be afraid of being seen as a bad person, if people see you as a bad person for speaking your truth, it’s their problem, not yours, and will be liberating to you. How others perceive me is not my problem and not a concern of mine. It doesn’t mean I like it when someone doesn’t see me and only sees their own reflection of themselves in me, and the bad person they accuse me of being, it’s really them. Still, I have no control over people’s reflections, and I just walk away and let them go find another mirror and scapegoat. Free at last!]

Remember Liliane Rombout, the therapist from the Netherlands who wrote to me in 2014, and I thought she might be real. I asked her if she would like to write the foreword to my book, and in the end, she turned out to be a big disappointment; she became very critical and accused me of protecting my mother.  Anyway, her nightmare just keeps on going; she sat with the critique of my book all these years, and now she has decided to change her name and publish her critique of my book under her new name! She never predicted that I would figure out that Liliane Rombout and Olane Roos are one and the same. Isn’t this the calculated move of a malignant narcissist or sociopath?! Everything blew up in her face because I made it all public in my blog posts, linked below. Now, people have all the facts and evidence, and they can draw their own conclusions based on the facts and evidence.

http://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/04/most-therapists-keep-themselves-others.html  

http://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/04/comments-from-blog-about-olane-roos-or.html  

There's no such thing as good or bad people.

There are unconscious or repressed people acting as if personality pretending to be good people, but are wolves in sheep's clothing, who can turn against you at any moment and do their evil acts behind closed doors without witnesses.

And some unconscious people can't act or pretend, and they do their evil acts in the open and usually get caught and end up in jail.

It's the level of repression that makes some people very dangerous! And some people are not as dangerously repressed.
And of course, there are a few of us who have taken responsibility for our own childhood repression and come from a place of honesty and authenticity.

I hope you find a more peaceful place soon.

Hung in there,

Sylvie