Tactics Narcissists Use to Groom You

People with narcissistic disorder are actually using mind control and brainwashing techniques to control those around them into giving them what they want. They will use lies, bits of disconnected truths, physical force, sex, emotional manipulation, mental torture, sexual abuse and combinations of these things to keep their victims in line. This goes way beyond wanting the occasional compliment. It really is pathological! The better ones can go undetected for years, for example, abusing the family at home, but seeming to be very friendly and helpful outside. Or they can wreak havoc in the workplace, climbing the corporate ladder very rapidly while destroying the careers and reputations of the competition.

Machiavellians generally share the following behaviors and traits:

1. Manipulation

Machiavellians lie, cheat, and flatter to get their way. They are long-term planners and calculated strategists, able to read people and to use their fears or weaknesses against them. They will bend rules, trick people, and fake sympathy to gain favors, McIntosh says. They can be charming at first but later resort to more aggressive tactics like bullying. Overall, they lack morals and are more than willing to cause harm to get what they want. (Here is how to recognize manipulation, for what it's worth.)

2. Self-interest

Ever the cynic, Machiavellians believe that everyone is acting in their own self-interest, so they do not form close relationships and do not trust easily. Money and power mean more to them than relationships with people. They can be incredibly disloyal, as their determination can lead them to ignore social pacts or bonds of trust. This trait also distinguishes them from the other two Dark Triad types (narcissists and psychopaths), as they do not necessarily have to be the center of attention. (yes, money, control, and power that all they care about)

3. Deceit 

Machiavellians understand that having information is useful. They often do not share information with others unless it is in their favor to do so. They may manipulate otherwise innocuous information and can be very crafty about taking information out of context. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/10/the-games-people-play.html

4. Unemotional

Machiavellians lack empathy and compassion. Generally, they are neither able to identify their own emotions nor recognize those of others, which is part of what enables them to be so willing to do truly anything they deem necessary to achieve their goals, even at other people's expense. Despite their strength in manipulating others, past research suggests Machiavellians actually tend to be less emotionally intelligent.

5. Ambition

Machiavellians are highly ambitious, and they'll use control and manipulation to achieve those ambitions. A 2016 study evaluating Machiavellianism among supervisors found these personality types make abusive and aloof managers, with the abuse becoming most prevalent when in a perceived position of power in the workplace. The researchers consider that power may be an amplifier that draws out the Machiavellian's preexisting behavioral predispositions, emotions, and beliefs. 

6. Competition

Machiavellians are highly competitive, so they view everyone as adversaries. They are willing to take a back seat or be a team player at times when doing so is to their advantage. Machiavellians are sensitive to the power dynamics in social contexts and can switch between cooperative and competitive tactics.

Read more in the link below:

https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/machiavellianism

"The goal of abusive individual is to gain or maintain power by whatever means possible or else to mask his own incompetence. 

In order to accomplish this, he must get rid of anyone who impedes his progress or sees through him."  

Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and Erosion of Identity by Marie-France Hirigoyen page 71

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/02/stalking-soul.html?m=1

This has been my experience in the workplace. Once they learn, I can see through their BS I become their target they must destroy, so they can go on with their lies, illusions, and mind games as usual. But coming after me they end up exposing themselves and eventually they are the ones to self-destruct. Just like my boss at my job of nine and a half years did in 2016. He treated me like a criminal but he was the one to turn out to be the criminal. But now is a big cover-up. If it was me, the little woman to commit a crime my name and face would have been splashed all over the news stations! And then all probably go on TV talking about how disturbed the little woman was -- to discredit me --and make a name for themselves by standing on my head.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/09/big-cover-up-by-sociopaths-at-my-ex-job.html

Pay very close attention to what the narcissist barks at you about. Specifically what he/she accuses you of. It's usually the closest thing to a confession you'll get.

“Authoritarian personalities are ones that “kiss above and kick below”, in other words, they are loyal to their leaders, but will attack those of lower rank. They also protect their “in-group” and attack the “out-group”. Social Dominance Orientation (SDO) personalities, on the other hand, tend to be those who lead the authoritarians, they are more interested in being on top.” 

"What can you do?

Unfortunately, this is a type of personality disorder, and there is little you can do when working for or with this type of person. If you are working for this person long term, you need to leave the organization or company as soon as possible. Their negativity will be extremely stressful and ultimately do damage to your career. 

Do not think you can talk to the person and ask them to consider changing. They do not allow anyone to challenge them, and they despise admitting mistakes. In fact, if you are questioning their decisions or behavior, they have already put a plan in motion to whisper about your own competency or value to the company or organization."   

https://tportis.wordpress.com/2011/01/02/understanding-the-psychology-of-the-kiss-upkick-down-leader/

Very true that's why I keep getting targeted  by this type of boss. No Job or relationship is Worth Health Destruction. 

Sometimes people try to destroy you, precisely because they recognize your power - not because they don't see it, but because they see it and they don't want it to exist.

Does the narcissist's description of YOU actually make a good description of the narcissist Welcome to the wonderful world of PROJECTION.

The techniques of brainwashing are simple: isolate the victim, expose them to inconsistent messages, mix with sleep deprivation, add some form of abuse, get the person to doubt what they know and feel, keep them on their toes, wear them down, and stir well.

Someone who hates you normally hates you for one of three reasons. They either see you as a threat. They hate themselves. Or they want to be you.

The enemy wouldn't be attacking you if something very valuable wasn't inside of You. Thieves don't break into empty houses. YOU got a purpose!

ARGUING WITH A NARCISSIST IS LIKE PLAYING CHESS WITH A PIGEON NO MATTER HOW GOOD YOU ARE....THE PIGEON IS GOING TO SHIT ON THE BOARD AND STRUT AROUND AND ACT LIKE IT WON ANYWAY!