Halloween

 When you set a new standard on how you expect to be treated, you'll be surprised at those who disappear from your life. It's a hard pill to swallow, when you realise how many people benefited from your lack of self-love and boundaries. It's also a great way to filter your circle.

Scientists can be very sadistic psychopaths too. Anyone that likes to understand why mad people do cowardly acts read the article Unlived Anger in the link below. It's quite a long article; here is the part where Dr. Alice Miller talks about a mad scientist.

“Sadism is not an infectious disease that strikes a person all of a sudden. It has a long prehistory in childhood and always originates in the desperate fantasies of a child who is searching for a way out of a hopeless situation.

An American professor, for example, has been conducting experiments for years with brain transplants. In an interview with the magazine Tele, he reports that he has already succeeded in replacing the brain of one monkey with that of another. He does not doubt that in the foreseeable future it will be possible to do the same thing with human beings. 

Readers have a choice here: they can be thrilled at so much scientific progress, or they can wonder how such absurdity can be possible and what purpose such pursuits can serve. But a piece of seemingly unimportant information may produce an "aha" reaction in them, for Professor White speaks of "religious feelings" connected with his endeavor. Questioned by the interviewer, he explains that he had a very strict Catholic upbringing and in the opinion of his ten children had been raised like a dinosaur. I don't know what is meant by this, but I can imagine that this image refers to antediluvian methods of child-rearing. What does that have to do with his scientific work? Perhaps this is the unconscious background for Professor White's experiments: by devoting all his energy and vitality to the goal one day being able to transplant brains in human beings, he is fulfilling his long-harbored infantile wish to be able to replace his parents' brains. Sadism is not an infectious disease that strikes a person all of a sudden. It has long prehistory in childhood and always originates in the desperate fantasies of a child who is searching for a way out of a hopeless situation."
From the book: “For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence” By Alice Miller
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2013/07/repressed-anger-is-very-dangerous.html?m=1

Most people are still living the lie and they will try to destroy anyone that tells the truth and tries to expose the real state of affairs or the facts and evidence. 

I have compassion for people that unconsciously and compulsively believe in lies and repeat those lies, but I have little compassion for people with sadistic tendencies that take pleasure in the suffering and misfortunate of others

"The narcissist will build you up in an effort to stroke their own egos by association, manipulate you and to get you indebted to them so that you prove yourself that you're worthy of their time once they start devaluing you. The narcissist will be putting in overtime trying to woo you. However, don't be mistaken: the wooing is NOT to make YOU feel good, it is about mirroring. They will prance, dance, flatter, cajole, impress, charm, and seduce you into liking them; because when you like them, they get to feel like they're looking in the mirror and seeing themselves smiling back."

Now that I'm no  longer blinded by the repressed emotions of the child I once was I see the lies and the games people play very clearly AND they cannot fool me anymore! I'm staying happy, joyous, and free.

"In families with several children, one may be chosen to reflect the narcissist's best qualities. They get the most attention, praise and support, but are also under the most pressure to perform. Another child may be a target for the parent's blame and shame, and scapegoated as a burden that can never do anything right compared to the chosen child. They may also be blamed as the reason that a narcissistic parent is forced to act in an abusive way. Both projections are two different sides of a narcissist's personality, but the chosen child and the scapegoat will have two very different childhoods, and this pits them against each other, even into adulthood." -Craig Malkin

Two sides of the narcissistic personality. In my family, I was the scapegoat!

If i moved back to Portugal today and moved close to the family, they would try to make me thier scapegoat all over  again. And as you witnessed recently people at my last job of nine and half years tried very hard to make me thier scapegoat. You have to be on the alert constantly because most people are unconsciously and compulsively looking for scapegoats to use to temporally and superficially alleviate thier own childhood repression.

This is exactly what happened with some people at my last job of nine and half years. I was aware of what they were doing the whole time!!! They didn't fool me, they were only fooling themselves!!!

Never expect a sane response from an insane system

The reason the whole humanity is drowning is because of people's fears of facing childhood repression and they are hanging together like drowning people. They don't realize it that all are drowning together! If we want to save ourselves, we have to gather the courage to stand alone on our own two feet and face our fears of facing and resolving our own childhood repression.

RBG was getting too old and fragile and i felt it in my heart she would not survive another presidency and if Democrats didn't win we would be in this situation and in big trouble, she should have retired when Obama had a good chance to nominate a Supreme court judge that would protect our rights and now we will pay the price for her lack of self-awareness.

Childhood repression is the root problem. Capitalism or addiction to money is just a symptom...

Will I ever see the day when politicians learn that my body is not public property and is not up for debate? I am the captain of my body and only me make decisions affecting it.  

"We have been educated, for a long time, to fit within domination structures: to do what authority says. When you want people to be nice, dead people and do what authority says, the last thing you want them to be conscious of is the life within them. You cannot make a good slave out of somebody who is fully alive...."

I have given up on humanity. Most people will always refuse to look at the root causes of how we got here. There is a lot of money to be made in all types of therapeutic businesses and treating symptoms. But, as long we keep ignoring the root of the problem we only fix our problems temporarily and superficially.  

 Most people can't change because they can't bear to face the painful truths in their lives and feel the pain.

People around the world are driven by the dead hand of their own repression to destroy everything beautiful in this world.

THE INVITATION

A comment someone left me the other day, brought to mind one of my favorite poems.

 THE INVITATION

 It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living

I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

 It doesn’t interest me how old you are.

I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool

for love,

for your dream,

for the adventure of being alive.

 It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon.

I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow and taken the time to feel it and heal it.

If you have been opened by life’s betrayals, or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further wounds.

I want to know if you can sit with pain --

Mine or your own, without moving to

Hide it,

Or fade it,

Or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy --

Mine or your own,

If you can dance with wildness

And let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of

Your fingers and toes,

Without cautioning us to

Be careful,

Be realistic,

Remember the limitations of being human.

 It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.

I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself.

If you can hear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.

If you can be faithless, and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it’s not pretty every day.

And if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure

Yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver, of the full moon, “Yes”

 It doesn’t interest me to know where you live, or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone,

And do what needs to be done to take care of the children.

 It doesn’t interest me who you know, or how you came to be here.

I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me,

And not shrink back.

 It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.

I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself; and if you truly like the company you keep, in the empty moments.

 - Oriah Mountain Dreamer, an American Indian Poet

I love this analogy!

 You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere.

Why did you spill the coffee? 

"Because someone bumped into me!!!"

Wrong answer.

You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. 

Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea.

*Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.*

Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled.

*So we have to ask ourselves... “what's in my cup?"*

When life gets tough, what spills over?

Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? 

Anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions? 

Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it. 

Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation; and kindness, gentleness and love for others. 

(Shared from a friend whose cup is full of goodness and inspiration.)

I like this analogy, but for those of us with difficult childhoods need to do a lot  of emotional work with the guidance of an enlightened witness to fill our cups with understanding, Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility.

The purpose of life is to stop the chains of compulsion repetition, and become mature conscious adults, and be happy, joyous and free free!

They Can All Kiss my Ass

All the assholes of the world that want to hurt me -- can kiss my ass -- and die of envy -- because my book/baby keeps bringing me some money every month! 

"You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life." Victor Hugo

You have enemies? Why, it is the story of every man who has done a great deed or created a new idea. It is the cloud which thunders around everything that shines. Fame must have enemies, as light must have gnats. Do not bother yourself about it; disdain. Keep your mind serene as you keep your life clear. Villemain is a brief segment taken from Hugo’s Choses Vues (Things Seen), a running journal Hugo kept of events he witnessed. The original French versions of these journals were published after Hugo's death.
Source: https://quotepark.com/quotes/1155960-victor-hugo-you-have-enemies-good-that-means-youve-stood-up/

"If You’re Not Making Enemies, You’re Doing It Wrong"

I guess I'm doing it right because since I published my book I'm making a few enemies!

"If your communications involve walking on eggshells and you’re afraid you might make an enemy or upset someone, you’re not really embracing the social web. Making enemies is a natural byproduct of being a part of our society, and thus if you’re truly being social this will happen on the web. If not, how much personality are you really injecting?

This is not a negative thing so don’t take it as such. The web and the world itself involve balance: between enemies and allies, friends and strangers, supporters and defectors. We need enemies to push us to the next level, challenge us and cause us to think and improve. They give us perspective and remind us of our purpose.

Embrace the full range of emotion and possibility in your content and interactions even if it might involve creating an enemy. Letting that stop you inevitably means falling short of your potential as a creative." 

Yes, I'm constantly being targeted by trolls or malignant narcissists or sociopaths, they do push me to keep on writing, which I guess is good for me. 

Big Red Flag

 “Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.” ovo je za jos naprednije... zavrsni stepen

What does not contain real love must contain an illusion. Real love is eternally present. Only illusions come and go. We get deeply hurt when we mistake an illusion for real love. What do you contain - an illusion or real love?

“We cannot really love if we are forbidden to know our truth, the truth about our parents and caregivers as well as about ourselves. We can only try to behave as if we were loving, but this hypocritical behavior is the opposite of love. It is confusing and deceptive, and it produces much helpless rage in the deceived person. This rage must be repressed in the presence of the pretended “love,” especially if one is dependent, as a child is, on the person who is masquerading in this illusion of love.” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The search for the True Self) Page 23

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2013/07/most-peoples-love-is-nothing-but-farce.html?m=1

"Many people have fallen victim to the manipulative behaviors of a covert narcissist without realizing what has happened until they are already in emotional pain. Overt narcissists are so much easier to see coming as they are what you might expect - loud, obnoxious, and arrogant. 

It is not unusual for people to find themselves in long-term relationships with covert narcissists only to be hurt by a sense of a lack of partnership or reciprocity in the relationship." DR. MELANIE CABRERA, PSY

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=Covert+narcissists+&m=1

Yes, we can say this without any hesitation. Every behavior that is directed against the health of a person, that hinders the healthy functioning of the body and mind, is a repetition of once-endured mistreatment, neglect, confusion, lies, betrayal, perverted practices, and the exploitation of the child. Alice Miller

Mental Blockades

 Mental Blockades

Today there are so few people who do not take pills, smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol. Most of them resort to these things to achieve an artificial state of well-being that can divert their attention from unpleasant thoughts, rather than prompting them to try to understand them. 

So how can they appreciate their true meaning or even try to? How can they realize that these feelings are their true friends, attempting to put them on a track that would lead to self-knowledge? 

Experience is the only thing that can bring this home to them. You have this experience, and now, to your astonishment, you find that the quality of your life has definitely changed for the better. But you will not be able to explain this to someone in the grip of the products manufactured by the pharmaceutical industry. 

They will not be able to listen to you. They will carry on “loving” their parents until they run into a crisis and suffer from depression or attacks of panic fear or both. 

But there are allegedly ‘effective” remedies for that as well. Extreme intelligence is no safeguard. These people will use those remedies as a drug to help them deny their own truth. 

Why do they do this? Because they are driven by the panic fear felt by the children they once were at the prospect of more beating if they should dare to see the truth or speak out about it.

So all I can say in response to your question about why so few people want to uncover their own histories is that the overwhelming majority of people in the world were beaten in early childhood.

From the book: “Free From Lies: Discovering Your True Needs” by Alice Miller

www.alice-miller.com

Most People Lack Courage to Look in the Mirror

Communities are micros of the world -- if most people wanted a giant mirror to see themselves -- I would not have become -- a target of a mob of sociopaths at the community where I worked for nine and a half years after I published my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions.

Like Donald Warner Parker wrote on his review of my book; "What more can you give a person and this world, for that matter, than sharing your own hard-earned wisdom, experience and truth through telling your own story and holding up a mirror for others to capture their own reflection in it, while at the same time providing the vital information of Alice Miller’s body of work to free themselves from their denial and repression and the illusions that keep it intact. 

It is so true what you wrote in your Chapter False Hope on page 126, “Ultimately I realized that self-help books and 12-step programs offer a false hope at best. I’m convinced that people who put their faith in these types of things — or in psychologists, psychiatrists or any other cult leader for that matter — are avoiding the real causes of their problems and are just masking their symptoms instead. The seductiveness of the quick fixes offered by traditional treatments and therapies is very powerful and even if they don’t work they offer at least temporary relief from the fear and pain of our abused younger selves.” You make it crystal clear in your book..."

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2014/08/a-dance-to-freedom-book-reviews.html?m=1

When the targeted person is able to see and articulate what is really happing to her, the target person ceases to become a victim and he/she continues to be a threat to those wanting to destroy us... 

Morality and Performance of Duty

I have been saying it for a very long time. Most laws are created by sociopaths to protect sociopaths. These words by Alice Miller come to mind: 

"Morality and performance of duty are artificial measures that become necessary when something essential is lacking. 

The more successfully a person was denied access to his or her feelings in childhood, the larger the arsenal of intellectual weapons and the supply of moral prostheses has to be, because morality and a sense of duty are not sources of strength or fruitful soil for genuine affection. 

Blood does not flow in artificial limbs; they are for sale and can serve many masters.

What was considered good yesterday can---depending on the decree of government or party---be considered evil and corrupt today, and vice versa. But those who have spontaneous feelings can only be themselves. 

They have no other choice if they want to remain true to themselves. Rejection, ostracism, loss of love, and name-calling will not fail to affect them; they will suffer as a result and will dread them, but once they have found their authentic self they will not want to lose it. And when they sense that something is being demanded of them to which their whole being says no, they cannot do it. They simply cannot."

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2011/06/where-there-is-no-love-there-must-be.html

Psychologist Toby Watson—Psychiatry is Misleading the Public About Mental Disorders

Psychologist Toby Watson—Psychiatry is Misleading the Public About Mental Disorders

Dr. Toby Watson is a clinical psychologist and outspoken critic of the psychiatric/pharmaceutical industry's false claim that mental disorders are biological or medical conditions requiring dangerous drugs to "treat" them.

I'm making a stand against psychiatry's misleading information with my book. A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions. 

https://www.amazon.com/Dance-Freedom-Guide-Liberation-Illusions/dp/1539859886/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Because of the fundamental truths in my book, it's the reason I became the target of a mob of sociopaths, malignant narcissists, assholes, or whatever you like to call these evil people. Many were psychiatry doctors and in the mental health profession. Most mental health professionals use their intellectual knowledge in psychology to play with people's minds. Once a mind is truly free cannot ever be messed with by anyone. FREE AT LAST! 
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/04/most-therapists-keep-themselves-others.html

It’s very annoying to listen to all the talking heads discussing the mental health of the gunman, but no one is discussing the collective mental health of our society that produces and breeds disturbed young people that hurt themselves, others or both. Of course, questioning society would require all of us to look in the mirror and who wants to do that!? That’s why some people at my last job attempted to murder my soul, before reading my book they liked me because they only saw their own false images reflected back at them, but after reading my book they saw their true image and they didn't like their own reflections! They thought if they destroyed me, they could get rid of the mirror and go on with their facades, false images, lies and illusions as usual.

When society is going to wake up that in the long run medication doesn't help people resolve childhood repression, but actually, in the long run, makes it worse. Just as Alice Miller wrote in an answer to one of her readers about the Virginia tech shooting: “The Virginia Tech story is a flight from the own history with the help of drugs. They only help to flee and not to see. I am so glad for you that you dared to feel.”

Usually, you don’t find a true enlightened witness within the so-called “mental health professionals” in most cases, they are the most repressed people I know hiding behind their degrees, seductive theories and illusions deceiving themselves and others and aggravating their patients' conditions contributing for these extreme acts of violence to continue endlessly.

Just as I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions:

“I’ve touched on this a lot in this chapter and elsewhere in this book, particularly in the section about Dr. Julio Machado Vaz — the psychologist who used me for sex — but I really want to reinforce the idea that so-called therapists and gurus only substitute one dangerous illusion for another. As Alice Miller writes, “What can happen when a doctor doesn’t stop at self-deception in his flight from pain, but deceives his patients, even founding dogmatic institutions in which further ‘helpers’ are recruited to a faith advertised as scientific ‘truth,’ can be catastrophic.” 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/10/mass-shootings-we-are-all-responsible.html?m=1

I see Impostors Everywhere

 I have met many impostors in my life!!! I see them everywhere!!! The property manager at my last job is a great impostor!!!

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/03/narcissists.html?m=1

"The narcissist is not a being, but a doing. What I mean is that every affirmation, every bit of attention, every argument is about what the narcissist does. The narcissist believes that doing will outshine being. As long as he says the right words, it doesn't matter whether he means them. As long as she does acts of kindness, she doesn't have to be kind. As long as people think he cares, he doesn't have to care. It looks to most people like the narcissist is a caring, even loving person; but those who have come to know the being, even just a little, realize that there is nothing there. That caring person is an impostor."

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/search?q=Narcissists+&m=1