Saturday, August 20, 2022

These are Most Likely the Only Two Authentic Reviews of Martin Miller's book

The two reviews below on Amazon about Martin Miller's book, are most likely the only authentic reviews, all the other five-star reviews were written, most likely, by the cult leaders Barabara RogersDaniel Mackler, and their followers. Barbara Rogers is the very first five-star review!  What joke! 

"This book is shameful.

Reviewed in the United States on June 2, 2020

This may be the most peevish, callous, and unsympathetic biography of a Holocaust survivor ever written. Mr. Miller is clearly angry at his mother, and surely he has a right to be if, as he alleges, she was emotionally unavailable to him in his youth. But in recounting his mother's near-death and the destruction of her entire family during the Holocaust, he makes far more references to his own feelings than to hers. 

He uses words like "shocked", "stunned" and "amazed", but always in reference to his own reaction to the inevitable omissions and inconsistencies in her story. The death of his grandparents in the ovens does not stun him. The possibility of his mother having been raped by kidnappers at one point does not stun him. But the fact that she chose not mention all this in a blurb on her website in 2010? Stunning, he reports.

Clearly, Ms. Miller is an important figure in psychology, and it is understandable for readers to want to know the background that inspired her work. 

But while Mr. Miller is clearly well-placed to reveal that information, the job ought to fall to someone who possesses some iota of empathy and doesn't "identify with abusers", as Mr. Miller openly confesses to doing in his work as a psychologist.

Put more simply, any time you find yourself nitpicking how someone survived the Holocaust, even your own mother, you probably ought to be ashamed of yourself."

Piggybacking on his mother's fame, yet bringing her down. Pathetic!!

Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2020

First of all, the fact that this "writer" was able to write a book using all her mother's techniques, indicates very clearly that said techniques actually work.

I am really sorry to hear that this guy had such a difficult life with a traumatized mother who seemed to have lacked the ability to implement her theories with her own son. [Alice Miller could not have implemented her techniques with her own son -- because she developed her techniques later in life -- when her son was already an adult in his thirties. Once we reach adulthood we are responsible for our own healing and Alice Miller with her books gives us the enlightened information to guide us through our own healing] That makes her a flawed and fallible human being, but that doesn't take away the merits of her brilliant writings.

Whatever this guy went through in his own childhood, I am really sorry to hear. But what he is choosing to do with his own pain is a coward and self-serving strategy to make a name for himself by trashing his mother, because he knows very well he doesn't even have 1% of the talent, the courage, the insight, the brilliance that Alice Miller had, both as a healer (since she didn’t like to be called a psychoanalyst) and as a writer.

To me, it’s very obvious that he is shamelessly piggybacking on his mother's success and brilliance to make a buck and a name for himself.

The only way he could attract any attention to himself was by saying "I'm Alice Miller's son". Otherwise, nobody would have stopped to read anything he wrote. That must be a hard pill to swallow for him, yet he'll have to swallow it for the rest of his life.

This "Martin the Martyr" guy may have been an innocent child once upon a time, but as an adult, in my opinion, he is an untalented, self-serving, and coward. He didn't even have the decency to preface his book by saying: "I acknowledge that my mother has helped millions of readers (myself included) overcome the tragic effects of trauma and of being raised by narcissistic parents. I also acknowledge that she was a brilliant writer. However, she, herself, didn't have the time or the awareness to implement her own techniques when she was raising me, so she caused me much pain. This is the story of my pain."

Instead, he chose to put his mother down (that, I respect), without taking the time to acknowledge the unquestionable, undeniable, impressive merits of the writer he's attempting to put down (that, I do not respect). Whatever he wants to say about Alice Miller, the mother is his prerogative. But how come he doesn’t have the objectivity to preface all his comments by acknowledging the merits of the writer he’s criticizing, i.e. his mother?? Furthermore, how come he cannot at least acknowledge that the mother he is so disappointed with is the same writer whose tools, techniques, and theories he’s using to heal his own pain??

Had he had any objectivity, decency, courage, humility, and more importantly, talent, he would have extensively mentioned, not only the greatness of his mother’s talent but also the smallness of his own.

If you are the son of Shakespeare, and you tell me that Shakespeare was a jerk, and all you do is badmouth Shakespeare, and try to sell books doing that (without acknowledging the brilliance of Shakespeare’s talent) then I can only entertain two theories:

1) That you are very hurt about what your father did to you. If this is the case, then, that means you are too emotionally wounded about the whole thing. It also means you haven't done the necessary emotional work to recover from your own traumas, either because A) You haven't been able to, B) Because you lack the courage to do so or C) Because you're in a hurry to try to extract a benefit from your father's fame and brilliance.

What a coincidence that this guy published this book after his mother died. He didn't have the courage to publish it while she was alive. Perhaps he first wanted to make sure he could get his hands on his mother's will before trashing her, thereby trying to capitalize on both his mother’s brilliance and success and his cowardly attacks of her. There's always method in mediocrity.

To me, it is very obvious that, apart from his legitimate trauma, the bottom line is that this is the drama of the son of a Genius who, when confronted with the fact that he doesn't even have 1% of his mother's talent, he felt the sting of envy, and instead of just processing his envy, he decided to attack the genius with whom he will never be able to compete.

For a person who claims to have such a deep knowledge about the complexities of people's psyches, I think he missed that small detail about his own conflicted inner world.

I understand that this guy was emotionally injured, but what he decided to do with his pain lacked objectivity, contribution, insight, and talent. He may have had a really bad mother (most of Alice Miller’s readers had the same experience), but he also happened to be the son of one of the greatest writers and healers of the 20th century. He forgot to mention that.

The facts still remain: Alice Miller was a brilliant writer. Her son is a mediocre writer at best. The other fact is that Martin has made no original contributions to the field of psychoanalysis. I doubt that he ever will.

If you want to read a valuable, insightful book, pick up one of Alice Miller's books and enjoy the brilliance of her talented and courageous mind and heart!!"

"you will never forget a person who came to you with a torch in the dark!"

Amazon deleted some of my book reviews because their algorithms thought they were made by friends from Facebook that I never met in real life, but most five stars reviews made on Martin Miller's book are authentic, Not! I'm so tired of the bias in this world. 

"you will never forget a person who came to you with a torch in the dark!" 

Read my blog Martin Miller the Son of Alice Miller Is a Double-Edged Sword

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/08/martin-miller-son-of-alice-miller-is.html

There are two kinds of people, those that think: I don't want others to suffer as I did. And those that think: I suffered and I want others to suffer too.

If someone is telling a lie consciously or unconsciously it’s abusive. A lie is always abusive because it confuses people. Lies are confusing! Not to me anymore, because I can recognize a lie from a distance even if is hidden behind, pretty, and coated with a little bit of truth.

Nothing pisses me off more than lies coated with a little bit of truth, those lies are the most dangerous of all, because they ring like truth, but are only to manipulate and confuse emotionally blind people.

Nothing will ever change in this world as long people believe the pretty seductive lies of charlatans

Let's make it clear if you are an adult and you feel abandoned when another person leaves you. You are stuck in childhood without realizing it because only children are abandoned -- adults are left not abandoned -- If we are able to understand and consciously feel this feeling of feeling abandoned within the context of our own childhood -- we will grow ourselves up into a conscious adult -- and you will never again suffer when people leave you or ignore you.

It’s so nice when toxic people stop talking to you. It’s like the trash TOOK ITSELF OUT.

Until people resolve childhood repression, will always be the same shit different asshole!


Tuesday, August 16, 2022

Social media posts warn people not to call 988. Here's what you need to know

Social media posts warn people not to call 988. Here's what you need to know

"One Instagram post said, "988 is not friendly. Don't call it, don't post it, don't share it, without knowing the risks." The post, which had garnered nearly a quarter of a million likes as of early August, went on to list the risks as police involvement, involuntary treatment at emergency rooms or psychiatric hospitals, and the emotional and financial toll of those experiences.

Other posts on Instagram and Twitter conveyed similar concerns, saying that the hotline sends law enforcement officers to check on people at risk of suicide without their consent and that people, especially from LGBTQ+ communities and communities of color, may be forced into treatment. " Read more HERE

The system is taking advantage of people's vulnerability and using the suicide hotline to rein them in into the system. Once the system has their hands on you -- you are nothing more than a subject to study and to play with...

Just like I wrote in my blog post I Will no Longer Be on Social Media "remember the system doesn't want you to be free -- the system wants to keep you in an emotional prison and treat you with medications and manipulative therapies to keep you subdued, obedient and well behaved without a chance of breaking free from your emotional prison --- your freedom is the last thing the system wants --- It's a game they are playing, a cat and mouse game, a very dirty game they play to keep their own fears at bay of having to face and feel their own tragic repressed childhoods."
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/08/i-will-no-longer-be-on-social-media.html

I feel for the people that might not be able to find the strength and courage to stand alone on their  own two feet and need to lean on the system for help because once the system has the reins on you it will be very hard to find true freedom. 

No one should have to be alone when going through the intense or overwhelming feelings of the child we once were without an enlightened witness present.

But more and more every day I come to the conclusion that finding a true enlightened witness is near to impossible. And we must become the enlightened witness to the child within us and liberate the little boy or little girl in us...


Abuse in our society is systemic. 
I rest my case. 



Wednesday, August 10, 2022

Letter to College Students of all Nations

 Today, some best-selling books about child rearing pretend to be updated and to have integrated the new psychological knowledge, but they often look to provide parents with the same ways they themselves were brought up.

They give advice on how to control, reign, manipulate and humiliate children in the most effective and undetectable way.

Unfortunately, the readers often oversee the poison in this pedagogy because as children they were never allowed to see and name it.

If we are not looking for power, our children do want to cooperate with us, they are interested in cooperation as a way of communication. But for doing that, they need to trust us. We are by no means trustworthy, if we want to govern them, just to escape our helplessness.

http://www.alice-miller.com/en/letter-to-college-students-of-all-nations/

Hi P.,
Thank you for writing. Yes, I think we can be friends for sure. I always respected children and I knew the responsibility of bringing children into this world and that is why I never had children, because I felt I was not in a position to have children.

I always knew the reason everyone was sooo fxcked up was because of the way their parents treated them when they were very little, but I could not quite articulate it and I was alone until I read Alice Miller’s books and finally I gained the courage to face up and feel my own history and speak up.

Am amazed that I with 6-grade education that dropped out of school in the 7 grade can see this soooo clearly and all the so-called “educated” smart people in the world cannot understand and cowardly hide behind their "degrees" so they don’t have to face up and feel their own sad truth and go around spreading their psychological virus under the disguise of help, very sad.

Yes, I am an animal lover, animals were really my first love and if we really want to help animals in the long run it’s a must we become a strong children's rights advocate.

We cannot be for animals rights advocate without being for children’s rights advocate also, which most people trying to help animals seem not to care about children and unconsciously and compulsively are just using the animals to escape from facing and feeling their own sad truth and everything they do is just a temporary and superficial fix to make themselves feel better.

You said you are originally from Germany, how did you end up in Spain? Have you read Alice Miller’s books? If you did I assume you read them in the original language of German.

I read, of course, the English translation and sometimes I wonder if anything got lost in translation.

I find that when I read the only two books of Alice Miller translated into Portuguese a lot of the message got lost in translation and I prefer to read in English, it seems the message comes more clearly in the English language.

I find the Portuguese language very complex and abstract that uses a lot of words and one gets lost in it. Maybe this is one more reason why the Portuguese are so complex and clueless. I am looking forward to hearing more about yourself. Take care. sylvie

Tuesday, August 9, 2022

Martin Miller the Son of Alice Miller Is a Double Edged Sword

I have no doubt that Alice Miller's son Martin Miller was the trigger for all of Alice Miller's books. And if he had not been born we would not have had Alice Miller's enlightened books to help us liberate ourselves from the emotional prison of our own childhoods. And I would probably be dead NOW or still living in an emotional prison.  He is just like a double-edged sword. 

Martin Miller's book is nothing but smoke and mirrors. So sad to witness that Martin Miller joined forces with all those that betrayed his Mother, while she was still alive, trying to stand on Alice  Miller's head to make a name for themselves. And didn't reach out to anyone that is standing by the side of his mother. 

All they accuse Alice Miller of, that's exactly what they themselves are doing. They don't take responsibility for their own unresolved childhood repression and  have mastered the art of projection and transference to perfection. 

Throughout Alice Miller's books, she gives windows into the struggles she had with her adult son and how she tried to help him, but once children reach adulthood it's too late -- and no one can help adults children, not even their own mothers. Once we reach adulthood we are responsible for our own healing and Alice Miller with her books gives us the enlightened information to guide us through our own healing.

"As a child, I had to learn to suppress my entirely natural responses to the injuries inflicted on me, responses like rage, anger, pain, and fear. Otherwise, I would have been punished. Later, at school, I was proud of the skill I had developed in controlling and restraining these feelings. I considered this ability a virtue, and I also expected my first child to achieve the same kind of discipline. Only after I succeeded in freeing myself of this attitude was I able to understand the suffering of children who have been forbidden to respond to injuries in an appropriate way and to engage with their emotions in a benevolent environment, so that in later life they can take their bearings from the feelings they actually have, rather than fearing them." Alice Miller

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/07/drugs-and-deception-of-body.html

“As I’ve aged, I’ve grown more tolerant and patient; I find it easier to wait and let people take the time they need to follow my trains of thought. What helped me to become accommodating was the fact that in contrast to twenty years ago, I no longer feel alone in what I know. Since then, both experts and lay people have been able to confirm my conclusions by their own experiences. I no longer have to prove anything.

And yet I still feel a need to share with others things that came to me only late in life. The result does not claim to be literature, we are not dealing here with “art for art.” For my stories are actually based on simple, conscious intentions to inform people and encourage them to think. For me, as for many women, it was very painful to realize that as a young mother I had missed so much, not only for my child but also for myself, simply because I did not know enough. It hurts to see how with more information many things could have turned out better and that much cannot be made good again. My stories arose from the wish to spare other people what I have suffered myself.” Alice Miller ~ Paths of Life, preface


Alice Miller liberated herself from the labyrinth of the psychoanalysis world in her fifties. Now I understand when Alice Miller shared in one of her books that her intense discussions with her adult son helped her stop her compulsions, because of these intense discussions with her adult son, she was able to see clearly and confirmed how psychoanalysis keeps people stuck in their childhood drama and seeing her NOW adult son lost in the labyrinth of psychoanalysis had to be hard for Alice Miller. 

Also confirms Barbara Rogers' IFS therapy does not work either, because if it worked she would not be stuck in her childhood drama anymore and would not be reenacting her childhood drama endless by exploiting others the same way she was exploited when she was a defenseless child. Just like Alice said: it takes courage to face and feel our painful truths, intelligence alone is not enough, but it rather helps create a lot of seductive lies.

Barbara Rogers wrote on her website that she was "lost in a fog of admiration". It’s not Alice Miller's fault that she lost herself admiring Alice Miller, but the reality is, she did not lose herself, because she has never found herself, once we truly find ourselves we can never lose ourselves again, the little girl she once was still lost in the fog of admiration with her own mother now transferred into a substitute figure, Alice Miller.

It’s her problem if she is still a lost little girl and loses herself in admiration over others, she is another malignant narcissist that has memorized good knowledge hijacked from Alice Miller's books, but has not experienced it at a personal level and now is trying to cast herself in the role of parent figure over others and misuses this good knowledge to manipulate and use others as poison  containers to distract herself, so she does not have to face and feel the repressed excruciating emotions of the child she once was; reenacting her childhood drama all over again with the people she is trying to help, but now she playing the role of her mother and the people she is trying to help, playing the role of the child she and they once were and they all remain lost in a maze with no way out, staying prisoners of childhood for eternity.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2012/08/daniel-mackler-and-barbara-rogers-came.html

I feel Alice Miller’s experience is very similar to mine. My love for Marty and my desire to help him made me look for help so we could save our relationship and in the process I freed myself. 

Alice Miller too saw that her, now adult son, had problems, and how ironic they both have the same name, my ex’s name is also Martin! 

Alice Miller, like me, started lifting every rock to look for clues to help her son and in the process resolved her own repression and freed herself, just like me, that I went out looking for clues on how to help Marty and I ended up liberating myself in the process. 

And at the end, I had to let Marty go, and Alice too had to let her son go because once a person is an adult, no one, not even the mother, can make up for what we need as children and we didn’t get. 

Once we are adults only we can save ourselves and anyone that tells us otherwise is fooling us with false hopes and promises. 

Alice Miller was driven to write her books to warn society of the dangers of childhood repression, to save the children of the future, and help us to face and resolve our own repression. 

This is why it’s so crucial for people to face their own repression before having children or at least become aware of their own childhood repression before their children become teenagers and adults, because it’s not the trauma itself that causes long-term damage, but the repressed emotions caused by trauma that causes long term damage and if parents became aware of the damage done before their children became teenagers or adults, then they can help their children express their true feelings of anger, fear and hurt, because the children are still emotionally dependent on their parents, but once the children become teenagers or adults the defense mechanisms and walls have been built and it’s out of the parents' hands, they can become the most conscious parents, like Alice Miller did, but it will be too late, because they can’t force the teenagers and adult children to remove the walls to face and feel their childhood repression, if they don’t wish to do so. 

To warn us, Alice Miller made herself very vulnerable to all the full-blown malignant narcissists, sociopaths, bad players,  psychopaths, assholes, or whatever you like to call NOW these very evil people in the world -- her courage is astonishing! 

As Alice Miller wrote in the answers below to one of her readers:

"I am also glad that you have the hope that we can pass on our knowledge to the masses. I had this hope 30 years ago when I wrote the Drama. I thought that showing the truth can change so much. Meanwhile, I became more skeptical or just more impatient after I discovered the fear of the beaten child in all of us that built up the omnipresent resistance against the truth." Alice Miller

(Me too I had the hope with the writing of my book would help pass this knowledge to the masses, but like Alice Miller, I have become skeptical and with the writing of my book I too learned that people's repressed fears at their parents build omnipresent resistance against the truth. And people rather destroy others than face and consciously feel their own repressed fears to see the truth. And this is why I have been harassed, prosecuted, and ostracized since I can remember and in the workplace by very bad players since I published my book. I understand people's fears of their childhood pain that have been trying to keep repressed all of their lives, but it is still disappointing that pretty much everyone I meet doesn't have the courage to face their fears and become real)   

Malignant narcissists, psychopaths/sociopaths always feed on people's weaknesses to advance themselves and don’t care who they hurt, step on and destroy in the process as long as they get what they want. 

In an interview Martin Miller gave, he was speaking in German and of course, I don’t understand what he is saying, but the body never lies and the language of the body is universal, his body is telling his truth and you can see how this man has been repressing all of his life with the aid of food and probably also with all kinds of medications, and never allowed himself to consciously feel the full range of the repressed feelings of the child he once was within the context of his own childhood. 

And as long as we go on repressing our feelings the compulsion to abuse ourselves, others or both will go on endless overtly or covertly and you can see he has been abusing himself by overeating to numb his feelings when present situations trigger him because he is extremely overweight.  

The title of his book is “The true drama of the gifted child- the tragedy of Alice Miller” but the title of his book should have been: “The Drama of the gifted child - the tragedy of my life” because his life is the real tragedy and sad beyond words, because he still stuck in his childhood and probably will never break free, because he is already in his sixties and the older we get hard it gets to resolve our own repression. 

Alice Miller’s life is not a tragedy, because she broke free and died free, the beginning of her life was a tragedy, just like most people's lives, but not the end of her life, she became honest with herself and others and that is the most important achievement anyone can reach in this lifetime, not like most people in our society that are stuck in their childhood pretending and acting as if personality their whole lives, fooling themselves and others. 

As Alice says in her book The Body Never Lies, page, 86: ““… For how can I prove to someone that freedom is within reach if all his life he has clung to the constraints that were necessary for his survival and if he cannot imagine life without those constraints? I can say that I myself have achieved such freedom by getting to the bottom of my own story, but I have to admit that I am not a good example. After all, it took me over forty years to arrive at the stage I have reached now. But there are others. I know people who have succeeded in unearthing their memories in a much shorter space of time, and the discovery of their own truth has enabled them to emerge from the autistic hiding place that used to be their only refuge. In my case, the reason the journey took so long was that I was on my own for most of it.”

Me too, just like Alice Miller it took me over forty years to break free because I was alone in my journey most of it.
I am so glad I didn’t have children; otherwise, the sociopaths out there might try to use my children to get to me, to try to discredit me and my book, as they do with Alice Miller because if I had children without resolving my childhood repression first, me too, I would not have been a "perfect" mother and without a doubt, my children would have been wounded TOO and vulnerable to be exploited by sociopaths, like Martin Miller is being used by the sociopath Barbara Roges and Daniel Mackler to stand on Alice Miller’s head to make a name for themselves, so they don’t have to face and feel the painful repressed feelings of the child they once were. 
When we have children without resolving our childhood repression we will unconsciously transfer into our children our internalized childhood abusers, and then we will face them all over again in our children. Oh, I'm so grateful I didn't repeat this vicious circle. 
This is what happened to Alice Miller. she had to let go of her son to protect herself from the full-blown malignant narcissist her son had grown into.  
Alice Miller faced in her husband her childhood abusers and then faced them all over again in her own son. 
This comment made by Makus Roth is so true: “Alice Miller's life cycle is comparable to the conversion of Sau to Paul, from the unconscious to the conscious mother. when she wrote the first of her 13 books (drama dbk= Das Drama de begabten Kiindes, The drama of the gifted child), 1979, when her son was already 29 years old and she kept on developing every time clearer and clearer. Already years ago she apologized to her son for her misbehavior in his childhood, whereas her son had and still has trouble with it.” Makus Roth
In her interview given with Ms. Noreen Taylor. Alice Miller says: "I have two adult children. I never hit them but I was sometimes careless and neglecting to my first child out of ignorance. Fortunately not so much as my parents had been to me. It is very painful to realize that but this realization can also be liberating from a self-deception. I think that the love for the own children can bear the truth and can even thrive on it while lies and denial seed cruelty for the next generation."
I read online somewhere Martin Miller complained that his mother disowned him and doesn't know what happened to her money. So he is still dependent on his mother and is mad at his mother for not giving him her money. 
Dependency breeds anger, as long we are dependent on the family's money; we remain stuck with them, in their emotional prisons, and hate instead of being resolved increases. We have to work to find our autonomy and not depend on the family or others standing in symbolizing our parents. As long we are dependent on the family or others financially, we remain prisoners of our childhood. Read my blogs Dependency Breeds Anger and Liberating Ourselves from Dependency that Breeds Hatred. 
Martin Miller saying is not an accusation that’s exactly what it is, disguised as wanting to understand deep-seated trauma. Anyone that has read all his mother’s books and worked through their own repression understands deep-seated trauma and how hard it is to resolve it. 
He is being a great example of how difficult it is to resolve deep-seated trauma. He is still stuck in his childhood fighting and competing with his mother to make a name for himself by unconsciously attempting to destroy the great discovers and accomplishments his mother made late in life by stepping on his mother’s head to satisfy his own childhood narcissists needs and letting the unresolved repressed emotions of the child he once was, taking revenge on his mother for the wrongs she did to him when he was a small child by attempting to kill his mother in a symbolic way in the public arena with his book, creating a smokescreen confusing many people already confused looking for a way out of their own labyrinths.
Nothing can anyone ever say take away from the pioneering, courageous, and honest work Alice Miller did. She was a true heroine. 
As Alice Miller shared in her article, “The Longest Journey” published on her website: “It has taken me all my life to allow myself to be what I am and to listen to what my inner self is telling me, more and more directly, without waiting for permission from others or currying approval from people symbolizing my parents.” 
It took her all of her life, but she did it and exposed the lies and hypocrisy of society. My experience has been the same as Alice Miller. 

A reader of Alice Miller wrote to her saying: “Books do not help to break open the prisons, it is true, but there are books that give us the courage to rattle at the prison gates with new courage. Your book is such a one to me.” 

--- That is exactly how Alice Miller's books are to me. It has taken me, too, all my life, but thanks to her books as my enlightened witness I was able to gather new and tougher courage to remove the invisible shackles and break free from the emotional prison I was born into.

The two reviews below on Amazon about Martin Miller's book, are most likely the only authentic reviews, all the other five-star reviews were written, most likely, by the cult leaders Barabara RogersDaniel Mackler, and their followers. Barbara Rogers is the very first five-star review!  What joke! 

Just as these two reviewers wrote on Amazon: 

"This book is shameful.

Reviewed in the United States on June 2, 2020

This may be the most peevish, callous, and unsympathetic biography of a Holocaust survivor ever written. Mr. Miller is clearly angry at his mother, and surely he has a right to be if, as he alleges, she was emotionally unavailable to him in his youth. But in recounting his mother's near-death and the destruction of her entire family during the Holocaust, he makes far more references to his own feelings than to hers. 

He uses words like "shocked", "stunned" and "amazed", but always in reference to his own reaction to the inevitable omissions and inconsistencies in her story. The death of his grandparents in the ovens does not stun him. The possibility of his mother having been raped by kidnappers at one point does not stun him. But the fact that she chose not mention all this in a blurb on her website in 2010? Stunning, he reports.

Clearly, Ms. Miller is an important figure in psychology, and it is understandable for readers to want to know the background that inspired her work. 

But while Mr. Miller is clearly well-placed to reveal that information, the job ought to fall to someone who possesses some iota of empathy and doesn't "identify with abusers", as Mr. Miller openly confesses to doing in his work as a psychologist.

Put more simply, any time you find yourself nitpicking how someone survived the Holocaust, even your own mother, you probably ought to be ashamed of yourself."

Piggybacking on his mother's fame, yet bringing her down. Pathetic!!

Reviewed in the United States on September 8, 2020

First of all, the fact that this "writer" was able to write a book using all her mother's techniques, indicates very clearly that said techniques actually work.

I am really sorry to hear that this guy had such a difficult life with a traumatized mother who seemed to have lacked the ability to implement her theories with her own son. [Alice Miller could not have implemented her techniques with her own son -- because she developed her techniques later in life -- when her son was already an adult in his thirties. Once we reach adulthood we are responsible for our own healing and Alice Miller with her books gives us the enlightened information to guide us through our own healing] That makes her a flawed and fallible human being, but that doesn't take away the merits of her brilliant writings.

Whatever this guy went through in his own childhood, I am really sorry to hear. But what he is choosing to do with his own pain is a coward and self-serving strategy to make a name for himself by trashing his mother, because he knows very well he doesn't even have 1% of the talent, the courage, the insight, the brilliance that Alice Miller had, both as a healer (since she didn’t like to be called a psychoanalyst) and as a writer.

To me, it’s very obvious that he is shamelessly piggybacking on his mother's success and brilliance to make a buck and a name for himself.

The only way he could attract any attention to himself was by saying "I'm Alice Miller's son". Otherwise, nobody would have stopped to read anything he wrote. That must be a hard pill to swallow for him, yet he'll have to swallow it for the rest of his life.

This "Martin the Martyr" guy may have been an innocent child once upon a time, but as an adult, in my opinion, he is an untalented, self-serving, and coward. He didn't even have the decency to preface his book by saying: "I acknowledge that my mother has helped millions of readers (myself included) overcome the tragic effects of trauma and of being raised by narcissistic parents. I also acknowledge that she was a brilliant writer. However, she, herself, didn't have the time or the awareness to implement her own techniques when she was raising me, so she caused me much pain. This is the story of my pain."

Instead, he chose to put his mother down (that, I respect), without taking the time to acknowledge the unquestionable, undeniable, impressive merits of the writer he's attempting to put down (that, I do not respect). Whatever he wants to say about Alice Miller, the mother is his prerogative. But how come he doesn’t have the objectivity to preface all his comments by acknowledging the merits of the writer he’s criticizing, i.e. his mother?? Furthermore, how come he cannot at least acknowledge that the mother he is so disappointed with is the same writer whose tools, techniques, and theories he’s using to heal his own pain??

Had he had any objectivity, decency, courage, humility, and more importantly, talent, he would have extensively mentioned, not only the greatness of his mother’s talent but also the smallness of his own.

If you are the son of Shakespeare, and you tell me that Shakespeare was a jerk, and all you do is badmouth Shakespeare, and try to sell books doing that (without acknowledging the brilliance of Shakespeare’s talent) then I can only entertain two theories:

1) That you are very hurt about what your father did to you. If this is the case, then, that means you are too emotionally wounded about the whole thing. It also means you haven't done the necessary emotional work to recover from your own traumas, either because A) You haven't been able to, B) Because you lack the courage to do so or C) Because you're in a hurry to try to extract a benefit from your father's fame and brilliance.

What a coincidence that this guy published this book after his mother died. He didn't have the courage to publish it while she was alive. Perhaps he first wanted to make sure he could get his hands on his mother's will before trashing her, thereby trying to capitalize on both his mother’s brilliance and success and his cowardly attacks of her. There's always method in mediocrity.

To me, it is very obvious that, apart from his legitimate trauma, the bottom line is that this is the drama of the son of a Genius who, when confronted with the fact that he doesn't even have 1% of his mother's talent, he felt the sting of envy, and instead of just processing his envy, he decided to attack the genius with whom he will never be able to compete.

For a person who claims to have such a deep knowledge about the complexities of people's psyches, I think he missed that small detail about his own conflicted inner world.

I understand that this guy was emotionally injured, but what he decided to do with his pain lacked objectivity, contribution, insight, and talent. He may have had a really bad mother (most of Alice Miller’s readers had the same experience), but he also happened to be the son of one of the greatest writers and healers of the 20th century. He forgot to mention that.

The facts still remain: Alice Miller was a brilliant writer. Her son is a mediocre writer at best. The other fact is that Martin has made no original contributions to the field of psychoanalysis. I doubt that he ever will.

If you want to read a valuable, insightful book, pick up one of Alice Miller's books and enjoy the brilliance of her talented and courageous mind and heart!!"

"you will never forget a person who came to you with a torch in the dark!"

Amazon deleted some of my book reviews because their algorithms thought they were made by friends from Facebook that I never met in real life, but most five stars reviews made on Martin Miller's book are authentic, Not! I'm so tired of the bias in this world. 


 


Monday, August 8, 2022

I Will no Longer Be on Social Media

"The emperor's new clothes" is a fairy tale. In reality, the kid that points out that the emperor is naked will get murdered. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2022/08/the-emperors-new-clothes.html

And this is why I have been harassed, prosecuted, and ostracized by very bad players most of my life, starting with my first-grade teacher and especially in the workplace, since I published my book because with my book I point out that the emperors of the world are naked. In this world seeing and feeling people are the most discriminated against, no matter what color or background. I have been the target of bad players in every color and background. 

Never too late to get real! First with yourself and then if you choose with the whole world, but what's important is that you must become real, at least in private, with yourself if want to die free and not in an emotional prison. 

If you do choose to go public with your story make sure you really have resolved your childhood repression and you are no longer blinded by the repressed emotions of the child you once were.

Otherwise, you might not be able to see clearly the mind games and the traps the sociopaths of the world targeting you put in front of you to trap you and bring you back into an emotional prison. 

And you will be endlessly stuck in your story in an emotional prison with little chance of ever escaping. If I had not truly resolved my childhood repression I would not have survived a mob of sociopaths targeting me after I published my book. 

I don't have the patience and time any longer for people that use their sharp intellect - to go around in circles in their heads - to avoid facing their own painful truths.

All of my life I feel like I have been working undercover to witness the depths of humanity's repression and corruption.  I have learned humanity's corruption or evil it's bottomless -- it's very ugly -- most people are acting as if personality pretending to be good people but are wolves in sheep's clothing and if you trigger their unresolved childhood repression, their meanness, and cruelty, it has no end. Publishing my book was the ultimate test that gave me all the proof.

My work undercover is coming to an end and I will be retiring soon and walking into the sunset and live happily ever after in peace and tranquility!  I have given up on humanity and I consider myself divorced from humanity. 

I think Russia might have started world war 3 and we all might get nuked soon, anyway, so I'm going to enjoy all my days left on this Earth away from toxic people.

I'm tired of dealing with sociopaths at every corner I take and I will not get out of my way anymore to try to reach others that are in the same place I once was; if people want the naked truth and leave behind the world of lies and illusions, they will have to go underground and dig for the naked truth like I did because without the naked truth -- true liberation and healing --  is not possible. I will still try to write back to anyone, and mean ANYONE, family or not, that finds me and reaches out to me -- you might not like my answers, but you can be assured I will give you an honest answer. but I'm done with social media. Social media is all about creating pretty illusions and pretty seductive lies. 

If you have read my book you know who Marty is! Before I met Marty I used to be a very private person, sharing very little of myself with others. Now I'm going back to being the very private person I once was. 

For now, I will just keep this blog, if there is anything I like to share with the world I will only share it here, and if people find it and helps them gather the courage to leave the world of lies and illusions behind, and liberate themselves, great! Being a support to others that's all I ever wanted,   

I have deleted most of my social media accounts. Twitter and Linkedin I had no trouble deleting them but Instagram and my personal Facebook page are giving me a hard time deleting them. 

When I click the button to deactivate accounts I keep getting a query error which is very annoying because I feel like I'm being held hostage by Facebook/Meta and they are forcing me to just abandon my pages. 

They like to control and block my truthful posts but they don't want me to deactivate my accounts because I'm sure they just want to keep the numbers of subscribers up because that's how they make money -- it's all about the math for them -- and they could care less about truth and humanity. 

I have been on Facebook for over 10 years and have not gotten much out of it! With any other relationship, I would have broken up a long time ago. I can't believe I stayed with Facebook this long without getting much back.

All they care about is money, power, and control. Facebook/Meta blocks the truth -- and allows the lies and illusions to spread like wildfires feeding the violence and all the wars around the world, therefore, Facebook is part of the problem and is evil. 

Facebook has been censoring me for many years as you can see in the link below:

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2011/05/i-am-being-censored-by-facebook.html

The wall of silence is everywhere, and why would it be any different online?! And yes, self-censoring means a lot of important information never gets shared, but seductive pretty lies and illusions with disconnected half-truths, and feel-good disconnect stories that work like medication to keep us numb, they get a lot of sharing and likes. 

People love to be distracted from their own painful truths and from doing the most important work in their lives -- doing their own emotional work. 

“This kind of self-censoring can mean that important information is never shared. Some had hoped that social media might provide new outlets that encourage more discussion and the exchange of a wider range of opinions. But we see the opposite – a spiral of silence exists online, too.”

Where there is 'control' there is ALWAYS abuse.



On youtube, I only left the big brother video and deleted all others. 

As long as people are too afraid to face their own painful truths and consciously feel the repressed emotions of the child they once were within the context of their own childhood, they will be driven by the dead hand of their own repression into the state of repetitive compulsion and no matter what anyone says or does, and how well someone articulates great ideas and pretty theories -- nothing matters in this world -- humanity is on the path to self-destruct -- and with the aid of technology -- it's going to self-destruct much faster -- humanity it's doomed. And is nothing anyone can do or say to change this.

Every time a person goes off the deep end and takes others with them like many dictators and mass shooters do. People say the need to raise awareness about mental health, remove the stigma and make mental health a priority. But don't be fooled most people even those in the mental health field don't care about your mental health, if they did, they would not lie to you, they would not play mind games with you and they would find the courage to tell you the naked truth -- because without it -- true liberation and healing is not possible. 

"Children who are told the truth and are not brought up to tolerate lies and cruelty can develop as freely as a plant whose roots have not been attacked by pests (in our case, lies)" Alice Miller 

"Unfortunately, narcissists in positions of high visibility or power-particularly in the so-called helping professions (medicine, education, and the ministry) -often do great harm to others."

Communities are micros of the world and If people cared about mental health I would not have been the target of a psychological warfare by a mob of bad players at the community where I worked for nine and a half years after I published my book sharing my life experiences and psychological discoveries -- at this community -- they were medical doctors, psychologists, psychiatrist doctors and even the ones that were not part of psychological warfare, they stayed silent on the sidelines looking at me stone-faced waiting to see if I would burn and crash. The silence from those on the sidelines is worst.

If it was me, the little woman to commit a crime, and self-destruct my name and face would have been splashed all over the news stations! And then all the "experts" would come out of the woodwork and take ownership of my story to spin it in any direction they wanted. 

Probably all go on TV talking about how disturbed the little woman was -- to discredit me and my book --and make a name for themselves by standing on my head. And all probably say that you need "God in your life", my ex-boss was a Mormon, a man of God, but he was the one to lose his mind, but now is a big cover-upI could see their games and traps so clearly. I was their target to destroy, but when was one of them to self-destruct, all became silent and no one cares that these criminals with their projections and lies -- I lost my job and more than half of my income  -- AND they could have destroyed my life completely.

Most people's objective in life is not freedom for themselves and others. Most people's objective in life is to one day own their own slaves.

Most people only care about themselves and create bubbles around themselves to feel safe. They don't realize that their unresolved childhood repression will catch up with them and their bubbles and illusions will burst from within sooner or later in one form or another.

If you truly break free and the system finds out, it will gather all the forces at its command to try to bring you back into the emotional prison --- remember the system doesn't want you to be free -- the system wants to keep you in an emotional prison and treat you with medications and manipulative therapies to keep you subdued, obedient and well behaved without a chance of breaking free from your emotional prison --- your freedom is the last thing the system wants --- It's a game they are playing, a cat and mouse game, a very dirty game they play to keep their own fears at bay of having to face and feel their own tragic repressed childhoods.

There are many people online articulating very well how the narcissist's mind works and how to deal with them, but very few mention the reason why people become full-blown narcissists and sociopaths?! So most likely, many are narcissists, themselves - talking a good talk without doing the emotional work and liberating themselves first.

The reason many people become narcissists and sociopaths is that they grew up with lies and had very tragic traumatic childhoods and because they can't face and feel this painful truth and consciously feel the repressed emotions of the child they once were within the context of their own childhood -- this is why people grow into full-blown malignant narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths...

Most people rather idealize their parents and childhoods, and to survive, they have learned the art of projection and transference to perfection -- they go through life unconsciously and compulsively looking for scapegoats to use as poison containers to temporarily and superficially alleviate their own repression -- so they can have the illusion that they are perfect, better and superior to others and they rather kill and be killed than face and feel their own painful truths. 

They endless are driven by the repressed emotions of the child they once were to hurt themselves, others, or both. I don't see many saying that there is people's denial and the repressed emotions that turn many into -- people of the lie -- and become full-blown sociopaths, malignant narcissists, assholes, bad players, or whatever you like to call these evil people.  

Just like I wrote in my book on pages 144 and 145 "Thanks to Alice Miller, I came to understand that the widespread repression of early traumas is the great malady of
our society. If we look close enough we can see that this repression is responsible for most of our individual troubles, as well as our societal ills. It appears symptomatically in
illnesses, obsessions, addictions, violence, greed, deceit, and loss of meaning. And it can lead to cruelty, violence, and criminal behavior. So many of us carry on as if all this perverse behavior is normal, while most of us who really want to find a way out go down the wrong path. All too often, we follow false prophets who get us to believe that eradicating individual
symptoms is the way to solve our problems. Little do we know that in doing so we always fail to get to the real heart of the matter — the denial and repression of childhood suffering."

Let me make it clear if you have unresolved childhood repression you will be blind by the unresolved repressed emotions of the child you once were and if you become the target of a sociopath or a malignant narcissist you will not see the emotional manipulations and traps these bad players set up for you -- and no matter -- how many very well articulated advice and tips you get on how to deal with these bad players -- you will fall prey into their traps and it will be very hard to escape from and you might not survive.

Also, in my book on pages: 172, and 173  "Resolving childhood repression is the vaccine against the charlatans of the world who exploit those who are still emotionally blinded by the unresolved, repressed emotions of the children they once were.

Once you’re free, your whole outlook on life is going to change. This quote, from a patient of Alice Miller’s, expresses what happens perfectly: “The world has not changed. There is so much evil and meanness all around me, and I see it even more clearly than before. However, for the first time, I find life really worth living. Perhaps this is because, for the first time, I have the feeling that I am really living my own life. And that is an exciting adventure. On the other hand, I can understand my suicidal ideas better now, especially those I had in my youth — when it seemed pointless to carry on — because in a way I had always been living a life that wasn’t mine, that I didn’t want, and that I was ready to throw away.”80

I’ve removed all the barriers of false morality and am totally free to experience all my feelings, take them seriously and decide whom, if anyone, to share them with. I’ve faced my past and can deal with my present circumstances in the context of growing awareness instead of childhood fears. These words by Alice Miller express how I exactly feel: “If I allow myself to feel what pains or gladdens me, what annoys or enrages me, and why this is the case, if I know what I need and what I do not want at all costs, I will know myself well enough to love my life and find it interesting, regardless of age or social status. … I will know that I have
lived my own, true life.”81

It really is a powerful feeling, and you’re likely to find yourself possessing a power that will be threatening to a lot of people. Society is on the side of the status quo, so be prepared. As Alice Miller writes in Free from Lies, going against the parents “is a source of major alarm for others … They will sometimes mobilize all the forces at their command to discredit the former victim and thus keep their own repression intact.”82

But thanks to Alice Miller, I’m content to be who I am regardless of what other people think. This passage, from Breaking Down the Wall of Silence, sums it up so well: “To live with one’s own truth is to be at home with oneself. That is the opposite of isolation. We only need confirmation when we are alienated from ourselves and in flight from the truth. All the friends and devoted admirers in the world cannot make up for the loss.”83

When I die I will not be sad because I have truly lived and will die in freedom, no longer scared and no longer a captive of the emotional prison into which I was born." 

After I published my book all the sociopaths at my job felt threatened by my knowledge and sure enough, they all gathered the forces at their command to try to destroy me and discredit me and my book. 

I'm sure the sociopaths at my last job never had met anyone before me that truly had resolved childhood repression. And thought my knowledge was just intellectual, like theirs, 
They didn't believe what I wrote in my book that I had faced and resolved my childhood repression and I had broken free from my emotional prison. And I'm sure they were confident that they could bring me back into an emotional prison. Big mistake! Underestimating me has always been people's biggest mistake.

"Narcissists aren't inconsiderate of your feelings. On the contrary, they are extremely considerate of your feelings. Your feelings are exactly what they are trying to affect. They closely observe how you react every time they do something to hurt you. And they are like sharks, able to smell a drop of blood a mile away. Why? Because your hurt feelings are their pain-killing drug. They are addicted to it. Ever since childhood. That's what their illness is, an addiction." Kathy Krajco

Hurting and destroying others' lives is their pain-killing drug. It's an addiction that keeps their own childhood repression intact. Just like I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom page 118: "... as long our pain remains repressed we will unconsciously and compulsively do to others what was once done to us." 

As long as people's childhood repression goes unresolved they will endless unconsciously and compulsively look for scapegoats to take revenge for the wrongs done to them when they were defenseless little children to temporary and superficially alleviate their childhood repression...

And as Alice Miller wrote in the answers below to one of her readers:

"I am also glad that you have the hope that we can pass on our knowledge to the masses. I had this hope 30 years ago when I wrote the Drama. I thought that showing the truth can change so much. Meanwhile, I became more skeptical or just more impatient after I discovered the fear of the beaten child in all of us that built up the omnipresent resistance against the truth." Alice Miller

(Me too I had the hope with the writing of my book would help pass this knowledge to the masses, but like Alice Miller, I have become skeptical and with the writing of my book I too learned that people's repressed fears at the parents build omnipresent resistance against the truth. And people rather destroy others than face and consciously feel their own repressed fears to see the truth. And this is why I have been harassed, prosecuted, and ostracized in the workplace by bad players since I published my book. I understand people's fears of their childhood pain that have been trying to keep repressed all of their lives, but it is still disappointing that pretty much everyone I meet doesn't have the courage to face their fears and become real)   

I don't know a single person in this world I would like to switch places with! Until the day I die I have created a little heaven on earth for myself. And no one can steal that from me. I'm at home at last. 

"Sometimes people try to destroy you, precisely because they recognize your power - not because they don't see it, but because they see it and they don't want it to exist." Yes, this is another reason I get targeted by bad players since I published my book. They don't want me and my power to exist. 

"Imagine growing up treated as if you're hard to love... later realizing you were the most worthy of them all... finding you've been surrounded by toxic people full of self-hate who gained light by putting out yours. An insight that makes you invincible"  Yes, realizing that others are not more worthy and superior to me was very liberating.  

"Those who are able to see beyond the shadows and lies of their culture will never be understood let alone believed by the masses." ~Plato~

I have to agree. “A writer writes not because he is educated but because he is driven by the need to communicate. Behind the need to communicate is the need to share. Behind the need to share is the need to be understood. The writer wants to be understood much more than he wants to be respected or praised or even loved.” ― Leo Rosten