I'm Short but I Stand Taller

The game we witness being played on the stage of the world is being played all over the world to a degree. So ask yourself in a symbolic way where are you positioned in your life right now?! 

At my last job of nine and a half years, I was symbolically in the position of Ukraine between two great forces. 

The security company that employed me was symbolizing Russia and the Community where I was working was symbolizing NATO! 

For nine years I had NATO on my side and Russia could not touch me and I was safe, but after I published my book A Dance to Freedom: Your Guide to Liberation from Lies and Illusions, both sides saw me as a threat, and the enemy number one that needed to be eliminated and destroyed --- my book triggered their fears of exposure -- and both sides joined forces against me to have me eliminated and destroyed so they could keep their own repression intact and go on with their lies and illusions as usual --- and that's when all hell broke loose. 

Just as I wrote in my book on page 173 “It really is a powerful feeling, and you’re likely to find yourself possessing a power that will be threatening to a lot of people. Society is on the side of the status quo, so be prepared. As Alice Miller writes in Free from Lies, going against the parents “is a source of major alarm for others … They will sometimes mobilize all the forces at their command to discredit the former victim and thus keep their own repression intact.”

I survived two great forces and both sides had casualties. And I'm standing taller than ever! I hope Ukraine too will survive and stand taller between the two great forces -- Russia and NATO. 

Stop the War in Ukraine

 "You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common.

They don't alter their views to fit the facts.

They alter the facts to fit their views." Doctor Who (1977)

Altering the facts - lying and false reporting -- to fit their views is the fuel fuelling the wars around the world. 

What happens in families happens in the countries; what happens in the countries it happens in the stage of the world.  Everyone in this world is responsible to a degree in one form or another for the violence and the wars we are witnessing erupting around the world.

Stop lying and enabling the lies to spread like wildfires. If we are living a lie and we lie to ourselves and others and allow the lies to spread we are helping to fuel the wars around the world. 

"Children who are told the truth and are not brought up to tolerate lies and cruelty can develop as freely as a plant whose roots have not been attacked by pests (in our case, lies)" Alice Miller https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/07/terrorism-is-war-of-poor-and-war-is.html?m=1

You might be right in a lot of things but the moment you throw the first punch and resort to violence you lose the argument completely. Putin and all his enablers are the aggressors NOW and a bunch of cowards for killing and destroying the livelihood of innocent beings. 

Stop the war -- look in the mirror -- and take responsibility for your part in this madness and start behaving like mature conscious adults.

"He who does not know the truth is simply ignorant, but he who knows it and says it is a lie is a criminal." Bertolt Brecht

“If we hate hypocrisy, insincerity, and mendacity, then we grant ourselves the right to fight them wherever we can, or to withdraw from people who only trust in lies. But if we pretend that we are impervious to these things, then we are betraying ourselves.” Alice Miller

Free from Lies: Discovering Your True Needs page 55

The goal of abusive individual

 "The goal of abusive individual is to gain or maintain power by whatever means possible or else to mask his own incompetence. 

In order to accomplish this, he must get rid of anyone who impedes his progress or sees through him."  

Stalking the Soul: Emotional Abuse and Erosion of Identity by Marie-France Hirigoyen page 71

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2015/02/stalking-soul.html?m=1

How would you define abuse?

 How would you define abuse?

Abuse means to me using a person for whatever I want from her, him, without asking for their agreement, without respecting their will and their interests. With children, it is very easy to do so, because they are loving, they trust their parents and most adults, and they don’t realize that they were abused, that their love had been exploited. Especially if they were forced to ignore their emotions from the beginning, they might have lost their sensibility for the warning signals.

A small girl will follow to the cellar the neighbor who promised her chocolate, although she may feel uncomfortable. But if she learned from the beginning of her life that her feelings didn’t matter and that she should obey every adult person, even if she feels resistance, she will follow the neighbor. She will behave like the Little Red Riding-Hood in the fairytale. And she may later suffer in her relationship with men for her whole life if she didn’t work out this early experience in the cellar. However, if she does, she will no longer be in danger of becoming a victim of rape or any other kind of molestation.

https://www.alice-miller.com/en/how-to-combat-denial/

Lies Is the Fuel that fuels Wars

Let's make it clear holding information that can be helpful to others is a form of lying and is abuse. Being a passive liar is just as destructive as the people speaking out loud lies. Lies are the fuel that fuels conflict and wars. We are all responsible for every conflict and war in this world.

“This kind of self-censoring can mean that important information is never shared. Some had hoped that social media might provide new outlets that encourage more discussion and the exchange of a wider range of opinions. But we see the opposite – a spiral of silence exists online, too.”
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/aug/26/facebook-twitter-snowden-nsa-revelations-pew

The wall of silence is everywhere, and why would it be any different online?! And yes, self-censoring means a lot of important information never gets shared, but seductive lies and illusions with disconnected half-truths, and feel-good stories that work like medication to keep us numb, they get a lot of sharing. 

People love to be distracted from their own painful truths and from doing the most important work in their lives -- doing their own emotional work. 
https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2016/08/the-wall-of-silence-is-everywhere.html?m=1

These words by Alice Miller are so true: “… Rather than take the risk, they prefer to forgo information that might be of life-death importance for coming generations. So in order not to have to call their own parents into question for a single moment, they cling to outdated, destructive opinions. …Clearly, the prospect of confronting one’s own personal history, in this case, is an alarming experience. And, as always, the fear of facts is stilled by a fascination with intellectual terms and abstractions aimed at concealing and masking the truth—the truth of facts that appear so threatening… At every attempt to share the new discoveries I made with the public, I ran up against the most determined resistance on the part of the media. It is true I can go on publishing these discoveries in my books because my publishers are already aware of the growing interest in this topic. But there are other people who have important things to say, and they are dependent on the press. They and their readers rely on essential information not being torpedoed. All too often, however, the media buttress the wall of silence against which all those who have begun to confront their own childhood rebound.”

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/04/the-silence-from-media-is-deafening.html?m=1

We Must Learn to Stand Alone

 "There's a reason narcissistic and psychopathic individuals withhold support, validation, healthy praise, and credit from those they feel threatened by, but "gush" over people they perceive won't threaten their ego and will make obedient members of their harem. Make sure you validate and reparent yourself so you stay away from these harmful people and are repelled by their lack of authenticity. You never have to seek the approval of toxic people, especially those doing less than you." Shahida Arabi, MA. @selfcarewarrior

Thank goodness, NOW I have two healthy legs to stand on my own two feet.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2020/02/correspondence-with-alice-miller.html?m=1

And this is why I survived psychological warfare in 2015.

"The ideal outcome for the abuser is to succeed in making the other 'evil,' which transforms the evil into something more normal because it is now shared. He wants to inject the other with what is bad in him. TO CORRUPT IS THE ULTIMATE GOAL" 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2024/06/to-corrupt-is-ultimate-goal.html?m=1

The world is full and run by sociopaths -- they will not change -- It's us that have to become enlightened to see clearly the traps, mind games, manipulations and become emotionally strong -- to not let ourselves be corrupted and manipulated by sociopaths -- their goal is to corrupt others and drive others to commit crimes -- so they can point the finger at others to cover up their own crimes. 

They hate real, authentic people, and they want to corrupt us so we become corrupted and soulless like them. 

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/09/to-corrupt-is-ultimate-goal.html?m=1

We live in a world of puppets and puppeteers.  

I wish sociopaths, psychopaths, and malignant narcissists would stop targeting me and leave me alone --  and they would give up on trying to bring me back into an emotional prison -- but I understand that nothing triggers their jealousy and hatred more than seeing a truly happy and free person. They are driven blindly by jealousy and hatred.   To protect myself, I have to keep long bridges from people and not cross them too often, so I can enjoy my freedom and peace for the rest of my life.

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2018/06/we-live-in-world-of-puppets-and.html?m=1

Being on the receiving end of a person who lacks empathy reveals a harsh reality about the human condition that we didn't want to believe existed. Watching people side with your abuser, disbelieve you, and even worse, bully or smear you along with the narcissist is highly traumatic and isolating. It's in our human nature, or socialization, to side with the crowd. The abuser gains momentum by getting to the crowd earlier and then playing up to them, which is their perverse talent.

Narcissist n): a more polite term for a self-serving, manipulative, evil asshole with no soul.

Isn't it freakin' Frustrating when you're the only person who can see how evil and manipulative someone is, and everyone else is blind to it?

Just a friendly reminder that abusers don't abuse/target everyone they come in contact with, so placing doubt on the people being targeted by the abuser based on your experience with that person is irresponsible and unkind. Thanks.

I'm Amazed how Many People Feel Free to Show me their True Colors

I was asked if I would write the letter below to help with a court case. 

Because I’m extremely dyslexic writing is one of the most difficult things for me to do in life! So once I write something down I just want to publish it and share it with others. Of course, keeping the people involved anonymous. 

 Dear Dr. T,

Let me introduce myself a little bit. I have been working for the last 17 years as a gate attendant for upscale gated communities in and around the Scottsdale area in Arizona.

I’m a survivor of childhood traumas and in 2015 I also survived being the target in the workplace of a psychological warfare. So you could say in my heart I’m a child advocate and an educator of how people with unresolved childhood repression can become, as adults, very dangerous people, like I encountered at the last company I worked for and keep encountering in the workplace. The workplace can be a very dangerous place to be in.

I met the P family six years ago when I started working at the gated community where they used to live.  I’m writing this teary-eyed because when I started working at their gated community I was suffering from PTSD from the psychological warfare I just had gone through at my last job. And I will never forget Mrs. P, C’s Mom, kindness that was very helpful in my recovery from the very recent traumatic experience.

 For the last few years while working at the community where the P family lived I only witnessed C being an excellent mother, talking with her daughter with patience and kindness, and no doubt the welfare of her daughter is her number one priority.

 I have not witnessed Mr.  X, A's father, interact together with his daughter, but he didn’t leave a positive impression on me. He was annoyed that I didn’t give him access into the community right away, but it’s part of my job to check the resident’s admit list and if the guest is not on the list I have to call the resident for permission to admit.

It’s amazing to me how many people feel free to show me their true colors, every day, just because they suffer from the illusion that some people are less than them, like for example security guards.  To me, we are all equals in this journey of life.

 Sincerely,

 Sylvie Imelda Shene