Narcissists are Secretly Suicidal and Homicidal

Comments on a Facebook post

Sylvie Imelda Shene: I just like to share that sharing our experiences can save someone's life or prevent them from losing it mentally. The young reporter who killed his colleagues on live television lost it mentally because he didn't understand what was happening to him. His intense feelings, which I am sure without a doubt, were triggered by a recent betrayal on the job. 

And yes, malignant narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths always play the victim role and make the real victim appear to be the abuser. 

It's all a game for the malignant narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths, and they don't even care if they put their own and the lives of others in danger in the process; it's all about winning the game at any cost. 

Malignant narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths are secretly suicidal and homicidal. Still, they don’t have the courage to do it themselves, so they play mind games, trying to manipulate others to do their evil acts, so they can go out playing the ultimate victim role. They don’t care if innocent victims are hurt or killed in the process; also, it’s all collateral damage in their eyes. They only care that they themselves are seen in the public eye as the victim, and their real victim is seen as the abuser. We need to educate the public about the malignant narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths' games and how they are wolves in sheep’s clothing.

Just as Marie–France Hirigoyen says in her book Stalking the Soul: “The victim needs to act, but because she is blocked by the hold over her, she can only find her freedom in an extreme gesture. To an outsider, any impulsive action, especially a violent one, is considered pathological. The person's reaction to provocation seems responsible for the crises. Guilt in the eyes of the abuser; she appears like the aggressor to outsiders, who don’t understand that she can no longer live trapped in a horrible situation. Whatever she does, she can’t set herself free: if she reacts, she is responsible for starting the conflict, and if she doesn’t react, the deadly stalking of her soul continues. 

As he drives his victim to destruction, the abuser gets that much more pleasure from pointing out her weakness or unleashing her violence. He makes her feel debased and unworthy. Depending on her reaction, she is described as temperamental and neurotic, alcoholic, or suicidal. The victim feels defenseless and tries to justify herself as if she were, in fact, guilty. The abuser’s pleasure doubles: he bamboozles or humiliates his victim and subsequently rubs her nose in her humiliation.
While the victim dwells on her guilt, the abuser benefits from the situation, making sure to cast himself as the victim. 

Justification becomes impossible when nothing is said and no reproach is made. Desperate to find a solution to this horrifying impasse, the victim may be tempted in turn to use innuendo and manipulation. The relationship then becomes ambiguous: who is the abuser and who the victim?
The ideal outcome for the abuser is to succeed in making the other “evil,” which transforms the evil into something more normal because it is now shared. He wants to inject the other with what is bad in him. To corrupt is the ultimate goal. 

His greatest satisfaction lies in driving his target to destructive acts or, in a larger framework, leading several individuals to finish each other off. 

All abusers, sexual or emotional, try to drag others into their orbit and distort the rules. Their destructive capability depends on the propaganda they disseminate among victims’ families, friends, and associates, showing to what extent the victims are “evil” and that it is, therefore, normal to blame them. Sometimes they succeed and seduce allies by ridiculing and scorning moral values. Not leading others into a circle of violence means failure for abusers and, therefore, becomes the only way to stop the spread of the abusive process. ...Physical violence can be testified to be outside evidence: eyewitness, police, and medical reports. With emotional abuse, there is no proof. It's a clean violence. Nobody sees anything."

Yes, many professionals out there are sicker than their patients, and they transfer their own unresolved repression into their patients, making them sicker than they already are!

Many professionals out there do great analyses and understand well the reasons for mental illness, depression, addictions, and chronic disease, that is linked to childhood loss and trauma. I quote few other professionals in my book to prove that are out there, other professionals saying what Alice miller says, but how they go about to heal those traumas, they use the same old tools like yoga, meditation, 12 steps, and controlled drugs, that all it does is manipulate people's feelings, and repress their authentic feelings all over again. And as long as people go on repressing their authentic feelings, they will be driven by them into the state of repetition compulsion of doing to others, themselves, or both, especially their own children, what once was done to them when they were defenseless little children. 

It’s the repression of our authentic feelings that causes us long-term harm and not the trauma itself.

Just as I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom, pages 61 and 62: “Alice Miller often talks about the 'life-saving function of repression.”27 As defenseless little children, we have no choice but to subconsciously repress our negative feelings for two reasons. First of all, we need support from others. And second, we just don’t have the ability to understand how the people we must rely on could actually be cruel to us. In the short-term, repression can have a positive effect in traumatic circumstances. But the subconscious actions that we think are saving our lives as children are what really keep us down as adults. In fact, Alice Miller believed that it wasn’t so much the traumas we experience that harm us, but “the unconscious, repressed, hopeless despair over not being allowed to give expression to what one has suffered and the fact that one is not allowed to show and is unable to experience feelings of rage, anger, humiliation, despair, helplessness, and sadness.”28 Abused and otherwise traumatized children are forced to repress their true feelings unless they’re lucky enough to find someone to comfort them. But because enlightened witnesses (and even helping witnesses) aren’t always readily available, most of us develop what Alice Miller calls a false self — usually for the sake of our parents — only to pay for it later in life. In an article entitled “The Essential Role of an Enlightened Witness in Society,” Alice Miller writes that “it seems clear to me that information about abuse inflicted during childhood is recorded in our body cells as a sort of memory, linked to repressed anxiety. If, lacking the aid of an enlightened witness, these memories fail to break through to consciousness, they often compel the person to violent acts that reproduce the abuse suffered in childhood, which was repressed in order to survive. The aim is to avoid the fear of powerlessness before a cruel adult. This fear can be eluded momentarily by creating situations in which one plays the active role, the role of the powerful, towards a powerless person.”29 This is how the vicious cycle of parental abuse continues for generations. And in extreme cases, the repetition compulsion can lead to violent atrocities against humanity.”

Also, I wrote in my open letter to the journalist Don Lemon: "Hi Don,
I agree with your comments about the shooting of the Virginia television journalists killed by a former co-worker that the shooter's lifestyle is irrelevant. And I also agree with you that people need to learn to manage their emotions. Feelings and emotions don’t kill anyone; only actions hurt and kill, and if people understand their emotions and learn how to consciously feel them in the right context, they will not be driven by them to hurt themselves, others, or both. I don’t know if you received my letter that I sent you a while back, and I published it on my blog as an Open Letter to the Media.

One of the reasons people resort to violence is because violence works to get the media’s attention to pay attention to their despair and to listen -- but sadly the media only pays attention to the criminals' last act -- if society learns to recognize the red flags of their despair and listen to them before they resort to acts of violence in a final attempt to get the world to pay attention. I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom, page 137: “Every adult in the world has the capacity to give up these illusions and free themselves from the chains of depression that result from emotional repression. Unfortunately, most adults do the opposite. They cling to the false hope of illusions, only to let current events trigger depressive episodes whose root causes are the lingering pains of childhood that haven’t been dealt with. Everything we become as an adult is connected to our childhood: Our experiences are a chain of events that bring us to the present moment, for better or worse. A criminal is never guilty just by himself. If society at large could ever find the courage to learn from the chain of events that occurred in each criminal’s life from day one, we could prevent many future crimes and a lot of unnecessary suffering.”

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job, read my blog, Experienced Knowledge.  

Never Trust a Person that Proclaims to Having Wonderful Parents and Childhood

Since writing this blog, my ex-boss, who the property manager recruited to do her dirty work, killed himself in a standoff with the local police after robbing a bank on March 11, 2016, which was my birthday! So, the property manager does have blood on her hands after all, because I know without a doubt, if she had not started this psychological warfare against me, he would still be alive – he was her collateral damage – when people start wars, someone always gets hurt or killed!!! I was her target to destroy, but when one of her helpers lost his mind and self-destructed, everyone involved became silent, and now it's a big cover-up that involves the FBI, the US Marshals, and the media. It's a shame he was not strong enough to stand up and do the right thing, and let himself become a puppet of the property manager — he paid a high price for it. Puppets never have a good end. If it were me, the little woman to commit a crime, my name and face would have been splashed all over the news stations! And then all probably go on TV talking about how disturbed the little woman was—to discredit me and my book—and make a name for themselves by standing on my head. And all probably say that you need God in your life. My ex-boss was a Mormon, a man of God, but he was the one to lose his mind, and now it's a big cover-up. I could see their dirty games and traps so clearly.
Read more in the link below:  

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/09/big-cover-up-by-sociopaths-at-my-ex-job.html

The property manager at my last job could never talk about childhood and proclaimed that her parents and childhood were wonderful. It took nine and a half years to stab me in the back and show her true colors! Publishing my book triggered her jealousy and revealed her true face, and she stabbed me in the back big time!!!

Yes, parents love to hide behind the "addiction" label. With all the information at our fingertips, parents today can no longer claim innocence, as our parents did not have the right information available. But sadly, people choose to reject this very important information, and I don’t have much hope for humanity.

“Our parents and grandparents are not to blame for having passed on to us misleading messages because, at that time, they had no better information at their disposal. But we do have them today. We can't claim the same innocence when the next generation blames us for having rejected information that was available to us and was easy to understand. Parents of today can no longer claim the unlimited freedom to be ignorant, nor can a responsible government do it. It must take into account the most recent scientific discoveries. Damages in the brain structure of beaten children can already be seen on the screens of computers. Violence to children produces a violent and ill society. True authority dismisses humiliation. Its discipline is based on listening and talking, on trust, respect, and protection of the weaker. It gives children the assistance they need to become responsible adults who will not turn to vengeful actions like wars and dictatorships because they will simply return to others what they once received and what they learned by example: protection and respect.” Alice Miller --Read the full article here

"If the repression stays unresolved, the parents’ childhood tragedy is unconsciously continued on in their children” Alice Miller (The Drama of the Gifted Child: The search for the True Self) Page 23

Heroin Project

"Your personal attacks on myself have absolutely no effect other than to show a level of lack of any character. More homeless kids on our streets and communities than ever before, and most of them girls. Child and sexual abuse, teen suicides, and domestic violence are at record highs. Parent groups who Refuse to go out into their communities and engage teens before it's too late. They blame it all on that magical word of addiction. Yet more and more very young teens of 12-13 years old in middle-upper-class communities are turning to heroin and other drugs daily. And of course, none of these social issues are going on in their communities and if they did what could that possibly have to do with kids turning to drugs? Definitely not parenting because 'addiction' has become the free pass and scapegoat even though the most extensive 60 years of combined research by the American Pediatrics Association program of Reaching Teens shows a very definite and direct connection. But if parents no longer have the veil of 'addiction' to hide behind, they offer zero programs to reach teens. When you proclaim yourself as a perfect parent yet have to resort to name calling and personal attacks on me throws the myth of the perfect parent out the door. Blaming the heroin or the drugs, the dealers, the cops and everybody else while looking to legislate, incarcerate and educate your way out of this has not made one dent in this ever-growing epidemic. Since you have no effective programs to offer and our prevention programs have a 97% success rate I remain unaffected."

Mor: This is how victims become abusers: not dealing with their own pain, avoiding the discomfort of recovery and then venting their triggers on others, usually children, because they can't leave and have no voice in the matter. EVERY victim needs to understand that ALL that stands between them and being the next perpetrator is the amount of recovery work they are willing to do.. Grief is a process, not a license to freak out. 

Sylvie Imelda Shene I agree, Mor, this is how victims become abusers. Behind every crime a personal tragedy lies hidden. No matter how many programs people come up with to teach parents to communicate with their children in a nonviolent way, parents will keep abusing their children in one form or another, as long their own childhood repression goes unresolved, covertly and silently with seductive lies to manipulate children and others behavior by masquerading with the illusion of love or overtly with physical abuse like spanking, beatings, and emotional insults. Never trust a person that can’t talk about their own childhood and always say that they had wonderful parents and a beautiful childhood, most likely this person is living a lie, masquerading with the illusion of love and sooner or later they will stab you in the back, it’s just a matter of time. Just as I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom page, 82 and 83 “Alice Miller wrote a lot about how destructive the impulse to protect our parents — especially our mothers — can really be. She believes that women are permitted to be tyrants in the home, punishing “millions of people who will never accuse them of their crimes because almost every child loves his or her mother and would never, never put her in troubles.”47 Facing personal pain is a lot more difficult than putting mom or dad on a pedestal and blaming ourselves for being a problem to them, or thanking our parents for the cruelty that we’ve come to believe was necessary to keep us in line. 

Alice Miller was frustrated by the fact that the path from being a misled victim to becoming a misleading perpetrator is totally ignored worldwide. She concluded that it’s because “almost ALL of us were beaten, and we had to learn very early that these cruel acts were normal, harmless, and even good for us. Nobody ever told us that they were crimes against humanity. The wrong, immoral, and absurd lesson was wired into our developing brains, and this explains the emotional blindness governing our world.”48 If we could just see with clarity what the false idealization of our childhoods can do to us, it would be easy to admit that our parents were cruel. Because when we refuse to admit it, we do nasty things to ourselves and to others. We repeat the cruelty that was done to us and find insidious ways to justify it, whether through religion, power, status or some other success marker. Dictators, cult leaders, and mass murderers are all links on the same idealization chain. “In order to understand how Mengele was able to remove the eyes and other organs of healthy people, we only have to know what was done to him in childhood,” Alice Miller writes. “I am convinced that something almost inconceivably horrible to outsiders would be uncovered, which he himself no doubt regarded as the best upbringing in the world, one to which, in his opinion, he ‘owed a great deal.’”49

People who idealize their childhoods, or otherwise ignore their pain, have limitless cravings for scapegoats on whom they can avenge themselves for the fears and anxieties of childhood. This is why some people have a lot of children because unconsciously they want to make sure they have an endless supply of vulnerable, defenseless new victims.” 



Unseen wounds
"An important study finds that children who have been psychologically maltreated suffer effects that are equal or greater than children who have been physically or sexually abused."

Few great quotes that describe the property manager at my last job so well! She spent 9 and half years waiting for an opportunity to try to destroy me. She never had me fooled. I always knew if she had the opportunity to cause me harm, she would of, because she always was jealous of me. Never trusted her.

The quote above also describes the property manager at my last job to a T! She didn't like it that I stood up to her. She accused me of things that she was doing. Her hypocrisy was epic.


The words below articulate the dark ploy of the property manager and members of the board who attempted to do to me at my last job:
"Another dark ploy is that narcissists contact your relatives, in-laws, friends, and anyone who will listen to broadcast blatant lies about your character. This doesn’t happen in all instances, but it is remarkable the lengths these malicious individuals exceed to trash you, put you at fault, and lead others to believe that you are “crazy”; you need immediate psychiatric help; you have always been unstable, etc. Even people whom you have trusted —family members—can be flipped to the narcissist’s side, especially if he/she has influence over them and deep pockets."

Dr. Linda Martinez-Lewi, Malicious Narcissists Convincing Others You Are At Fault Or Crazy 
Narcissists have a sinister side, especially if they want something that you have and you refuse to comply. This becomes very ugly during the severing of a marital relationship. Many non-narcissistic spouses who have been treated abominably still want to believe that when it comes to ending the marriage, the narcissist will be civil and fair just for the purpose of watching you exit quickly. The plays are opposite–Bring on the army of shark-toothed lawyers and go for the jugular. To protect yourself, study and research in-depth the true nature of the narcissistic personality, including examples from real life. Get to know this personality profile intimately. It will be a strong reminder when you start to bend or buckle to the narcissist’s tricks, tactics, strong-arming techniques, and charm offensive.

Another dark ploy is that narcissists contact your relatives, in-laws, friends, and anyone who will listen to broadcast blatant lies about your character. This doesn’t happen in all instances, but it is remarkable the lengths these malicious individuals exceed to trash you, put you at fault and lead others to believe that you are “crazy”; you need immediate psychiatric help; you have always been unstable, etc. Even people whom you have trusted —family members—can be flipped to the narcissist’s side, especially if he/she have influence over them and deep pockets.

Read the full article here. 

To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job, read my blog, Experienced Knowledge  

Open Letter to Don Lemon

Hi Don,

I agree with your comments about the shooting of the Virginia television journalists killed by a former co-worker that the shooter lifestyle is irrelevant. And I also agree with you that people need to learn to manage their emotions.

I wrote a book with the help of a ghostwriter sharing my life experiences and psychological discoveries, and how to consciously feel and understand our emotions triggered by present injustices. But after I published my book I became the target of a mob of psychopaths at my job of nine and a half years and I lost my job because of it.

I have been documenting my experiences about the injustices I suffered at my last job on my blog Sylvie’s place. I tried to get the media’s attention to my story to help me reach a wider audience to help others deal with their emotions and prevent future tragedies like this one.

Feelings and emotions don’t kill anyone, only actions hurt and kill and if people understand their emotions and learn how to consciously feel them in the right context, they will not be driven by them to hurt themselves and others. I don’t know if you received my letter that I sent you awhile back and I published on my blog as an Open Letter to the Media.  

One of the reasons people resort to violence is because violence works to get the media’s attention to their despair and to listen if society learns to recognize the red flags of their despair and listen to them before they resort to acts of violence in a final attempt to get the world to pay attention. Just I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom, page 137: “Every adult in the world has the capacity to give up these illusions and free themselves from the chains of depression that result from emotional repression. Unfortunately, most adults do the opposite. They cling to the false hope of illusions, only to let current events trigger depressive episodes whose root causes are the lingering pains of childhood that haven’t been dealt with. Everything we become as an adult is connected to our childhood: Our experiences are a chain of events that bring us to the present moment, for better or worse. A criminal is never guilty just by himself. If society at large could ever find the courage to learn from the chain of events that occurred in each criminal’s life from day one, we could prevent many future crimes and a lot of unnecessary suffering.”

Almost everyone at my last job started treating me differently after I published my book. They couldn’t stand the fact that someone who they considered inferior — a guard gate manager — could get a real book out into the world and understand the human condition so much that their own lies and illusions were exposed.

It was a combination of jealousy and fear that led a group of sociopaths to begin a campaign of emotional harassment against me in hoping of getting me to self-destruct. The sociopathic behavior ramped up almost daily, and after six months they decided to fire me without cause.

It saddens me that someone can actually lose their job for exercising their right to freedom of speech. I think what my former employer and co-workers did was a disgrace, and I want as many people to know about it as possible. And maybe will help others deal with injustices and discrimination in the workplace in a healthy way without hurting themselves and others.

If you think you can help me get my story told, I’d really appreciate it.

Thanks so much for your consideration.

Sincerely,

 Sylvie Imelda Shene

Narcissism Comes from Pain suffered in Childhood

Since writing this blog, my ex-boss, who the property manager recruited to do her dirty work, killed himself in a standoff with the local police after robbing a bank on March 11, 2016, that by coincidence was my birthday! So, the property manager does have blood on her hands after all, because I know without a doubt, if she had not started this psychological warfare against me, he would still be alive – he was her collateral damage – when people start wars someone always gets hurt or killed!!! I was her target to destroy, but when was one of her helpers to lose his mind and self-destruct, everyone involved became silent, and now is a big cover-up that involves the FBI, the US Marshals, and the media. It's a shame he was not strong enough to stand up to do the right thing and let himself become a puppet of the property manager -- he paid a high price for it. Puppets never have a good end. If it was me, the little woman to commit a crime my name and face would have been splashed all over the news stations! And then all probably go on TV talking about how disturbed the little woman was -- to discredit me and my book -- and make a name for themselves by standing on my head. And all probably say that you need God in your life, my ex-boss was a Mormon, a man of God, but he was the one to lose his mind, but now is a big cover-up. I could see their dirty games and traps so clearly.
Read more in the link below:  

https://sylvieshene.blogspot.com/2017/09/big-cover-up-by-sociopaths-at-my-ex-job.html

                                           No, I will never look at anyone the same way!

Amy Kamis Tarshis Narcissism comes from pain. Be compassionate to everyone.

Mor: Compassion for a scorpio can get you killed...  That's why it is important we learn the FBI profiling technique.. we need to discard what we were taught [love conquers all, everyone is decent etc] and SEE what is going on around us, not assume we live in a world full of people with best intentions, but learn to spot the lion's tail among the grass.. not their eyes , their smiles or their tales, but their actions betray the predator. It's like fishing, watch for the critical moments when the mask slips.. how they talk to a waiter, how they react to a spillage, how they react to someone bumping into them.. how well they keep their promises... 

Sylvie Imelda Shene Thank you, Mor, for your insightful comment. It’s nice to know that are others out there with their eyes wide open. Yes, compassion for a narcissist or a sociopath can get you killed and not just you! Others also... I have discarded my belief that love can heal all wounds. And now I see people clearly as they really are and no longer fooled by the pretty masks and the veils people wear.

I can see behind the pretty masks and veils. But in the workplace is not always easy to stay away from these narcissists, because in every workplace there are always narcissist people around. I would have been able to stay under the radar of the narcissists at my job of nine of half years if I didn’t have written my book sharing my experiences and psychological discoveries and how I freed myself from lies and illusions. 

But after the narcissists read my book and found out I could see through their pretty masks, veils, facades, and illusions that’s when they started the methodical and very well orchestrated plotting to destroy me because it triggered their fears of exposure. 

Narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths what their fear most is being exposed and will try to destroy anyone that sees them as they really are and might remove their masks and expose them. 

Yes, narcissism comes from repressed pain in childhood and these people become dangerous because of their denial of childhood suffering and the idealization of their childhoods. They rather destroy others than face their own painful truths. I have compassion for the children they once were, but I have no compassion for the dangerous adults they have become. Just as I wrote in my book A Dance to Freedom: your guide to liberation from lies and illusions, page 144 and 145: 

“Thanks to Alice Miller, I came to understand that the widespread repression of early traumas is the great malady of our society. If we look close enough we can see that this repression is responsible for most of our individual troubles, as well as our societal ills. It appears symptomatically in illnesses, obsessions, addictions, violence, greed, deceit and loss of meaning. And it can lead to cruelty, violence, and criminal behavior. So many of us carry on as if all this perverse behavior is normal, while most of us who really want to find a way out go down the wrong path. All too often, we follow false prophets who get us to believe that eradicating individual symptoms is the way to solve our problems. Little do we know that in doing so we always fail to get to the real heart of the matter — the denial and repression of childhood suffering. When I read about these ideas in Alice Miller’s books, I felt as if this amazing woman was talking directly to me! For once, someone was finally able to cut through all the BS pushed on me by people I could never figure out and through techniques that never worked — that could never work. All these people and techniques did was cement and strengthen the walls of my repression, making me feel like I used to feel as a child — that I was stupid and that something was wrong with me. The fact that I couldn’t do the techniques correctly or follow the advice of these people only added to my feelings of guilt and shame. By the time I had fully committed to Alice Miller’s teachings I was already starting to feel what I learned I had to feel — the pain I had repressed from my childhood.”

Yep! This was one of the big reasons i was target by the sociopath that was the property manager at my last job because I am a truly happy and a free person, but she was not able to destroy me and she didn't walk away wearing my skin. But instead, her true self-was revealed.

Narcissistic Mind Games of ASPD - Psychopath Violence - Victim Syndrome

Keep on being the threat and articulator spreading awareness of Narcissistic Anti Social Personality Disordered perpetrators and the evil that is in their nature to cause harm and fatality to their own families and countless innocent others, animal and human! NPD/ASPD is often co morbid together with other personality disorders, Sociopathy, Narcissists and Psychopathy together in one individual makes them very very covertly dangerous, they want to stay unexposed and undetected destroying lives.. Your awareness and education is a threat to them, anti-social behavioural knowledge is a victims salvation and instrumental in life's survival ... Maintain power over your own life knowing that toxic dangers and evil exists in individuals who could be in any type of relationship with you (parent, spouse, friend, sibling, neighbour) with the dead soulless eyes, aggressive surly apathetic unsmiling faces who have a Narcissistic Anti Social Personality Disorder! NMG


Yes, I'm a threat that's why the narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths at my last job tried every wicked mind game possible to destroy me, but I will never be a victim again and I will do all I can to expose their wicked mind games. Thank you, Donald Warner Parker, for posting this to my Facing childhood Traumas Facebook page.


To read more about my experiences with the mob of sociopaths or narcissists at my last job read my blog Experienced Knowledge  

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